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Chapter 68
Bread Eleven. Just Admit It, You Won’t Die (4)
For a moment, while his attention was distracted by the pain in his arm, Ellie had disappeared without even a shadow left behind.
If this keeps up, she’s going to get hurt again.
“How long has it been since your ankle healed, and you’re already running…”
She was even fast. It wasn’t like Ellie, who usually said it was better to be late than to run. It was clear how much effort she was putting into escaping.
When he realized he couldn’t catch her no matter what, the strength in his legs, which had barely been holding him up, drained completely. Maurice gasped and collapsed to the ground.
‘All this just from having a bit of a fever…’
His vision swirled. The wound must have become infected. Maurice groaned and banged his head against the wall.
He had failed.
He should have gently refused and soothed her, but there had never been a failure like this.
“Damn it… pathetic…”
When he saw Ellie crying at the door, it was like someone had slammed the back of his head with all their might. Maurice was genuinely flustered.
Even his sharp tongue, the kind people said could bargain with demons in hell, was of no use. Stiff and frozen, he just repeated dumb words.
Ellie was crying in front of him at a completely unexpected moment, having caught his true feelings which he hadn’t intended to reveal. That last part—the shock—was the worst.
If Ellie hadn’t been crying, he might have been able to respond with his usual brazen composure.
He thought that if Ellie liked him, it might be convenient in some ways, but that was only a tool for a short-term relationship. In fact, Maurice had never even considered that possibility until Edmund asked.
Moreover, he never imagined she would cry even if she were rejected. He thought Ellie would hide her heartbreak behind a sulky face and say plainly, “I knew it, I didn’t expect anything anyway.”
“That Ellie…”
Maurice repeated her words in his fevered mind.
‘I never misunderstood.’
‘It wasn’t a delusion either.’
Her eyes, wiped with the sleeve of her dress, were red. Even as he listened to her voice, Maurice felt sorry for her eyes.
If you rub them too hard, they get red… she should put a cold damp cloth on them before bed to ease the sting. I’ll make sure to leave it in Ellie’s room later.
Even though her face was soaked from crying, Ellie showed no expression. Her voice didn’t tremble either.
If it weren’t for the tears, Maurice wouldn’t have even realized she was confessing.
‘I liked you.’
When he first heard that, he was too flustered to focus on the meaning, only thinking about stopping her, but now he truly grasped what those words meant.
In other words, Ellie liked him.
Ellie.
Immediately after saying it as if to vent her frustration, she pressed her lips together and glared at Maurice.
As if annoyed at herself for liking someone like him. Adorably.
“This is troublesome…”
Part of him felt sorry she was crying, while another part worried about awkwardness or growing distance. It had taken considerable time and effort to get this close to shy, cat-like Ellie.
‘It wasn’t boring or exhausting because it was fun.’
Ellie was truly cute. Even her teasing chatter and the slightly painful punches were so endearing that he could always make time for them no matter how busy he was.
She had maintained a seemingly indifferent expression, yet she liked him all along.
Maurice covered his face with his large palm.
“This is really troublesome…”
Why did he keep smiling?
‘I’m so embarrassed, aahhh!’
Ellie immediately went straight to bed and buried her face in the pillow.
She ignored half-questions like “Are you going to sleep?” or “Where have you been?” from Edmund and lay down, letting out a silent scream. A small escape of sound, hoping the pillow would swallow it.
‘I should’ve just pretended I didn’t know…’
No, as soon as she realized they were talking about her, she should have just left.
But people naturally listen when their name is mentioned, whether in praise or insult. Pausing unknowingly to hear the conversation, she realized feelings she hadn’t fully recognized… If she had known she’d be caught right there, she would have run away immediately.
For a while, she struggled face down on the bed, punching the innocent pillow and bedding, until she finally paused. Then, flipping over like turning a pancake, she stared at the ceiling and muttered:
“No… this isn’t my fault…”
Was it her fault that her feelings were discovered even though she never intended to confess? No.
Even if she had developed feelings without being treated well, this was clearly unfair to her.
“Who told me to be nice, damn it…”
Maurice was the first real, trustworthy person Ellie had met since leaving the MacClure estate. There had been the loan contract with Gori, but he had clearly given her much more than that.
Though it hurt her pride to admit, she had been lonely growing up in that estate. Her distrustful and cautious attitude wasn’t entirely good either.
If he hadn’t looked in on her frequently under the pretext of interest, playfully teasing her while giving little things, she wouldn’t have received anything from Maurice.
Only later did she realize that Maurice didn’t need to pay attention to her.
The money he lent her wasn’t much to him.
Even the interest, taken in scones, wasn’t a huge amount. Compared to what he did for her, it was practically free.
Moreover…
“Isn’t it humanly wrong to randomly touch someone’s head?”
Is he my brother? Am I his dog?
Even though he teased and hit her enough to hurt, he never got genuinely angry. After serving as a target for her venting, he would lower himself, meet her eyes, and grin. Saying, “Feeling better now,” he would pat or press her hair before leaving.
He knew he was handsome and played it slyly.
Strict but kind, kind but never overly close. Never viewed as a romantic interest, yet touched without distance, sometimes laughing freely. And even saved her life once—who could resist that?
Looking back, she was proud of herself for enduring this far.
‘If it weren’t for me, it would’ve been chaos by now.’
Not just chaos. If someone had played with him, she might have deserved a stab for it.
‘It’s because it’s me that it’s come this far. I’ve handled it well enough. From now on, just do well so it doesn’t get messy. No point in dwelling on the past.’
Sitting up, she punched the innocent pillow a few times. Only after rationalizing and letting herself feel victorious did her embarrassment finally ease.
Then Edmund came in.
“Ellie, not sleeping? You said we’d leave early tomorrow.”
“Eddie…”
“…Did you cry?”
Even without turning on the light, he noticed. Edmund immediately grabbed Ellie’s chin. Seeing her red eyes, he muttered fiercely:
“Who? Who made you cry? Who lives where? Tell me quickly, Ellie. No, we should call Ban too…”
“Probably you, Eddie.”
Ellie pouted as she noticed his trembling violet eyes.
“I went to get Eddie and heard everything.”
“….”
Even with her already pale, slender face, the color drained further.
If Edmund hadn’t probed Maurice, Ellie wouldn’t have realized her feelings, been caught, or been forced to run away.
Though Edmund didn’t tell Maurice about Ellie’s feelings, she had lost the chance to hide or discard them.
Even if rejected, Maurice could have used gentler words. No need for raw words at an unprepared moment.
“S-sorry, Ellie.”
“Why are you apologizing so seriously? It just happened…”
It’s not your fault I got rejected… Ellie chuckled. Seeing this, Edmund stepped back.
“…Go to sleep first.”
“Ah, where are you going? What are you going to say!”
“….”
“Don’t say anything, it’s embarrassing. And forget it, please.”
Ellie held his wrist tightly, stopping him.
“Thank you. For letting me avoid being pathetic. Lucky it ended early…”
“…Sorry…”
“If you apologize, I’ll feel worse.”
Ellie deliberately laughed out loud. The more she laughed, the more Edmund slumped like a drenched cat, looking miserable.
“Please forget it, seriously.”
“…But he made you cry.”
“I didn’t cry because of him, I just did…”
Did Maurice stab her eyes or rub them with onions?
‘He just didn’t like me.’
It wasn’t Maurice’s excuse, nor Edmund’s place to scold him.
No need to feel miserable. Ellie rubbed her red nose and made a promise to herself.
When she returned to Rayad, she would work like crazy.
Eventually, she’d forget everything.
