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Chapter 30.
Six Breads. The Hardship I Thought I Escaped Comes After Me (2)
Ellie didn’t truly hate Elaine.
She just didn’t not dislike her.
Recalling the memories of her previous life, Ellie believed she was an adult.
She didn’t remember exactly when she died, but she thought she had lived until roughly her mid-twenties, so her mental age should have been around there too.
But mental age couldn’t help but be influenced by physical growth.
Even though she knew in her head that it wasn’t something to feel resentful about, there were times when tears burst out anyway.
Reborn, Ellie was still a child, she needed a guardian, and at times it was unbearably hard.
The only reason Ellie endured from the age of eight until she turned nineteen was because she had decided that one day she would leave this mansion and cut ties with “those people.”
And “those people” included the heroine, Elaine.
Ellie tried to erase her presence so as not to be hated, tried to smile as much as possible, but honestly, she didn’t want to see Elaine’s face if she could help it.
So I wasn’t as grown-up as I thought, huh.
It wasn’t that she envied Elaine for receiving her father’s love.
That man’s love? She’d refuse it even if offered.
But even knowing Elaine wasn’t guilty of anything, whenever Elaine clung to their father’s leg and looked at Ellie with eyes as if pitying something miserable, she couldn’t help but feel her blood boil.
No, but seriously, isn’t that infuriating as hell?
Who’s pitying who, huh? The audacity.
Elaine was kind. Righteous and clever.
Unlike the novel, since she had grown up carefree under her father’s love, she lacked tact, but that was something that could be learned, so it couldn’t even be considered a flaw.
Maybe to Elaine, kind as she was, Ellie’s circumstances naturally stirred pity—but Ellie hated that even more.
When Ellie saw that teary, trembling face, her mouth itched to snap back with something cutting.
And all that patience endured, all for nothing.
“Ellie, you’re safe!”
Elaine cried out with tearful joy. Ellie gave a lukewarm nod.
“Well, obviously.”
Elaine stretched out both hands to grab her shoulders, but Ban and Edmund stepped in threateningly to block her.
Ellie slapped the broad backs of the two men like wooden posts and pushed them aside. Ugh, why. Edmund glared at her with dissatisfaction, but she ignored him.
Elaine looked suspiciously at Ban and Edmund, then turned her gaze back to Ellie.
“Where on earth have you been, Ellie? Goodness, you’re so thin. How much you must have suffered! I was so worried. Why did you disappear without a word….”
“Are you seriously asking me that because you don’t know?”
“Huh?”
Ellie let out a short sigh.
The heroine Elaine was tactless, righteous, and…
Damn it, this is unbearable. Enough with the sugar-coating already.
Selfish.
“You’re asking because you don’t know? Then what, was I supposed to hide in the mansion kitchen for the rest of my life?”
Her sharp retort came out harsh. Elaine froze stiff, as if she couldn’t even imagine such a response.
“N-no, what I meant was….”
“I disappeared quietly so I wouldn’t be a bother, so why are you making a scene?”
“……”
“From what I hear, you ran away from home to look for me, didn’t you? Am I right?”
“……”
“So I am right.”
Ellie swallowed down the curses that had risen to the tip of her tongue.
“You know just how obsessed the duke is with you, don’t you?”
“…I do.”
“Did it not occur to you, not even once, what kind of retaliation he’d take out on me if he found out the reason you risked everything to run away was me?”
“……”
Elaine hesitated, eyes dropping to the ground.
She really hadn’t thought about it even once.
Ellie wanted to bury her head in her hands. Elaine’s intentions might have been good, but the results always ended up harming Ellie.
When Elaine tripped while rushing over just to say a word to her, Ellie would be locked in her room for a week. It was always like that.
“But, but… that place isn’t mine. I… I shouldn’t be stealing your place.”
“And what place is that?”
“…The McClure family’s….”
“Not sure I ever really belonged to that family. All I ever got was treated like some leech living in their kitchen.”
“…Ellie. No. Nobody thought that. In truth, we all knew. Everyone…”
“I don’t know who you mean by ‘everyone,’ but it doesn’t matter what they knew. The only one who mattered was the Duke of McClure. And he treated me worse than a leech, so that’s what was true in that house.”
“I just… I just thought you shouldn’t lose everything.”
“Great. Thinking. If you’ve got a head, maybe try using it for thinking. That’s what it’s attached for, isn’t it?”
She knew her words were getting harsher. But her raging mouth wasn’t listening to reason anymore.
“What changes, exactly, because you found me?”
“……”
“Did you really think being dragged back to the house I barely managed to escape from was what I wanted?”
“…I thought you might be dead. I couldn’t find you no matter what, so I thought I had to search myself….”
“Dead or alive, what does it matter?”
“How can you say it doesn’t matter…?”
In the end, large tears welled and spilled down Elaine’s eyes.
Watching Elaine sob with her cheeks wet through, Ellie felt suffocated.
Crying only solved problems when you were under five years old.
“Now that you’ve confirmed I’m alive, so what? Maybe you just wanted to ease that pathetic guilt about stealing someone else’s place, I don’t know—but let me be clear, it’s a nuisance. Don’t ruin my life just so you can feel better.”
“That’s not it. I wanted to stop hindering you! I wanted to return everything you lost because of me and beg your forgiveness!”
“There’s nothing to forgive.”
Ellie felt she needed to speak more firmly.
“And there’s nothing to pity either. I’m proud and confident in myself. I just want to cut ties because I find you all disgusting and unbearable. Whether it’s the damn duke’s surname, or his cursed wealth, or whatever the hell else—take it all. I don’t need a thing.”
“Ellie, you dropped honorifics.”
Edmund burst out laughing.
“Yeah, I know. Phew, gotta control myself.”
Ban kept staring fixedly at Elaine with a blank expression.
Is he falling for her? Is he?
Ellie briefly hoped, but when she saw Ban’s eyes, she let out a dry chuckle.
There was no warmth in those green eyes, much less love. That wasn’t affection or interest—it was wariness, suspicion of what Elaine might do. Guess not yet.
Then Elaine spoke through her tears.
“Then what should I do? I was so happy when you called me sister… isn’t there really anything I can do for you?”
“……”
Get out of my sight and let’s each live our lives separately.
Ellie wanted to say that, but barely held her tongue.
The heroine is supposed to prevent the war…
Together with Ban and Edmund, she was supposed to protect the kingdom of Rosso.
But… will she really?
Edmund, delighted by Ellie’s sharp words, was cheering her on, while Ban glared at Elaine like she was some dangerous criminal.
Felt like the first button had been fastened very, very wrong….
“I’ll say this again: I don’t hate you.”
Edmund looked at Ellie and silently mouthed: Lie. Ellie, annoyed, kicked him in the shin.
“Whether you go back or not, that’s up to you. But don’t look for me again. Don’t even say you want to. Just pretend I never existed from the start….”
“I can’t do that!”
“Think, just think! If you tell the duke you risked your life to find me, we’ll both end up dead!”
“…I won’t say that….”
From the outside, it might look like Ellie was the one bullying Elaine.
After all that running away, this was the result of finally facing her—Ellie felt the cruel weight of fate.
Before Elaine, Ellie seemed destined to be nothing more than a petty villain.
But even so, she had endured quite a lot. She’d been downright gentle.
“I already told that pig-nosed ugly—tell him you gave up looking for me and go home. Then whether you leave again or not…”
Preferably leave again and get rolling….
Heaven gave you talent. You’ll snatch up Sword Master in no time. Fighting.
“Even if we meet by chance someday, don’t act like you know me. That’s the only thing I ask of you.”
“……”
Elaine didn’t answer, but it seemed she understood enough.
Ellie signaled to Edmund.
Edmund, standing behind her, slung an arm over her shoulder and signaled to Ban.
Make sure she never comes near again—“say” it clearly.
Ban gave a cold smile and nodded.
Looking at Elaine with her head bowed, Ellie clicked her tongue.
Hurting her left an uncomfortable pang—but honestly…
Guess my true nature really is that of a villain.
And yet, she felt refreshed.
