PHIM 06

Chapter 06

This time, I frowned. Seeing that, Ribael let out a light laugh, took a sip of his tea, and said it was just a joke.

“……Right. Anyway, it’s definitely not me. I just happened to pick up a kid.”

“Lady Luisa, picking up a child? My goodness. The sun must be rising in the west. Oh, gods above.”

No—was it really that shocking that I saved a kid?

I stared at Ribael in disbelief as he made the sign of the cross and began praying.

I picked up a child, not ate one!

His prayer went on for a full ten minutes. At this point, I was seriously wondering if he was possessed.

I barely held back a yawn as I waited. Only then did Ribael slowly open his eyes, wearing a benevolent smile.

“It seems even the gods are pleased. They say you’ve finally discovered your human side. Haha.”

……So he really was possessed?

Judging by how brightly he was smiling, it didn’t seem like a joke.

No—seriously, just tell me it’s a joke. Gods, all of a sudden? It feels like the scale of my life just jumped several tiers.

“……Anyway, about the kid.”

I desperately wanted to escape the god-related conversation even a second sooner, so I hurriedly changed the subject. Thankfully, Ribael didn’t seem interested in continuing that topic and nodded.

“I did hear rumors that you handed over a young boy to Merihen some time ago. I suppose you brought him back?”

“That’s right. It’s him.”

“I see. But why are you telling me this, Lady Luisa?”

Ribael tilted his head. Judging by his expression, it seemed like I might be able to leave the child with him. So I asked as casually as possible, pretending it was no big deal.

“It’s nothing serious. I was just wondering if the temple could take care of a child out of compassion.”

“Oh? So you picked him up and now you’re dumping him on me because he’s a nuisance?”

……This is why I hate perceptive people.

“I did think it was strange—Lady Luisa suddenly doing a good deed.”

Leaning deeply back into his chair, Ribael added that remark. I cleared my throat awkwardly.

“Well, it’s just… the kid looked like he was about to die. But raising him myself is a bit…”

“Then why didn’t you just let him die? That would’ve been the natural course.”

For a priest whose job is saving lives, that’s a hell of a thing to say.

I frowned slightly and stared at Ribael, but he showed no intention of correcting himself. Instead, he spoke first, firmly.

“I can’t do it.”

“Why? All you ever do is kill people anyway.”

“I’m about to begin ascetic training. And honestly, a child even you hesitate over—I don’t want that responsibility either.”

“When did I ever say I hesitated over the kid?”

If I had, I wouldn’t have picked him up in the first place. It’s just that… I don’t think it’d be good for a child’s mental and emotional health to be raised by me.

Even as I continued making excuses, Ribael’s expression remained indifferent.

“If that were true, you’d have called him by name at least once. Looks like you haven’t even given him one yet, have you?”

“…….”

“Well, I suppose that fits. Lady Luisa would keep her distance so thoroughly she wouldn’t even name the child.”

His words pierced straight through my psyche.

It felt like a heavy blow to a blind spot.

I wasn’t exposed to danger, yet my breath caught in my throat.

Muttering “just as I thought” while looking at my stiffened expression, Ribael poured himself another cup of tea.

“He’s a child you brought back. At the very least, give him a name.”

“……If I name him, it feels like I’m taking on too big a role. I hate that kind of trajectory.”

I tried to argue back, but I could feel the balance shifting. I was helplessly getting dragged along by Ribael’s logic.

“The moment you saved him, his entire world became you, Lady Luisa. Compared to that, a name is nothing.”

……I couldn’t argue with that either.

Meeting my gaze, Ribael narrowed his eyes with a smile. It felt like he was asking me to agree, and that left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Seeing my reaction, Ribael laughed out loud, drained the rest of his tea in one gulp, and stood up.

“Oh dear. I need to depart immediately for training. I’ll excuse myself to pack.”

Leaving me sitting squarely in his reception room, Ribael bowed elegantly and exited.

He was the one who left—but somehow, I felt like I had been thrown out.

* * *

I sat there for a while longer before downing the now-cold tea in one go and leaving the temple.

I must have spent quite some time talking with Hart and Ribael, because the sky was beginning to lighten.

Dragging my feet home, I opened the door—and spotted something wedged in the doorway.

“Why are you up so early?”

It was the kid.

The child, curled up and leaning against the door, snapped his head up the moment he heard my voice and stared at me.

“Lady Luisa? Where—where did you go?”

“Just went to meet someone for a bit.”

“Who?”

His voice trembled as he pressed the question again, more insistently than usual. I hesitated, then decided there was no point lying.

“Someone who might raise you.”

“Raise… me?”

“Yeah. I can’t exactly raise you myself.”

“……Why? Do you hate me? Did I bother you?”

The child jumped to his feet in terror. His legs wobbled, nearly giving out, but he staggered toward me anyway, desperation written all over him.

I slowly shook my head.

“No. It’s not that.”

“Then why? Please tell me. I can fix anything.”

That’s not something you can fix.

As my expression faltered, tears welled up in his eyes. Feeling a tug at my arm, I looked down to see the child gripping the hem of my sleeve.

The silence stretched on.

After staring up at me desperately, the child bit his lip and slowly shook his head.

“……No. I’m sorry. It’s all my fault. Please forgive me.”

Anyone watching would think I was abandoning you for real.

I could’ve pushed his hand away—but Ribael’s words echoed in my mind. My chest felt strangely uncomfortable.

Letting out a sigh, I patted the child’s head. He flinched and ducked his head, his grip on my sleeve tightening.

“It’s not like that……”

“I’ll do anything you tell me, Lady Luisa. I won’t complain—please… please don’t abandon me. I’ll be better.”

—

“Please don’t abandon me! Please! I’ll behave! Mom! Dad! Please!”

—

……This kid really knows how to press the cliché button.

The moment he spoke, it felt like I was being dragged back into the nightmares I’d had for days.

Compared to me—who had survived alone in the middle of a battlefield ten years ago—his situation might actually be better.

But even then, I had Hart. An escape route. Someone who would grab my hand the moment I reached out and support me.

But you……

“……Yeah. You’re not like that.”

“Lady Luisa?”

Feeling the child’s sweat soaking into my sleeve, I placed my hand gently on his head.

His eyes were still drowning in anxiety.

Seeing them shook my resolve—and in the end, I did something I knew I’d regret again.

“If you want to stay here…… fine. Do whatever you want.”

“Really…?”

That was basically surrender. The child stared up at me with wide eyes, hope and fear mixed together.

I ruffled his hair in a gesture of acceptance. His bangs poked at his eyes, but he didn’t seem to mind—he just broke into a beaming grin.

What’s so great about being with me? Still, the warmth he gave off wasn’t unpleasant, so I smiled back.

His warm, sweat-dampened hand curled around my pinky, just like on his first day in my house.

“I’m really good at guarding the house! I can see blood well, and if you want, Lady Luisa, I can even kill people!”

“You might die doing that. Remember the woman who owned the house you stayed in for four days? She sends chimeras to my place regularly.”

Even though I was trying to scare him, he just nodded eagerly with bright, unblinking eyes.

Did I bring home a person—or a puppy?

I could practically see floppy ears and a fluffy tail wagging behind him. His messy hair, the blind devotion in his gaze……

“Lady Luisa?”

“Mm. You’re a dog. A puppy.”

“A puppy…? Is that a name?”

The unfamiliar word made him react immediately.

“Puppy… is that the name Lady Luisa is giving me?”

Like hell it is!

“No. You just look like a dog. Woof. A dog.”

“Oh. A mutt?”

Why turn it into an insult?

Is this some advanced form of sarcastic retaliation for almost abandoning him? Calling me a bastard?

Unable to follow a child’s thought process, I shook my head. When I glanced over, his shoulders seemed to droop slightly.

Did he want a name?

I’d already talked to Ribael, and the kid seemed to want one, so… I supposed I had to give him one.

Looking into his clear eyes, a word suddenly flashed through my mind.

“Adele.”

“Huh?”

“Not ‘puppy.’ Adele. That’s your name.”

At my offhand declaration, his already large eyes widened even more. His lips moved soundlessly for a while before he asked blankly,

“My name… is Adele?”

“Why? Don’t like it?”

“N-no! I love it! I really, really love it!”

“Adele. Adele.”

He rolled his name around in his mouth again and again. Seeing the flush spread across his cheeks, he must’ve liked it a lot.

Then, after murmuring his name for a while, Adele glanced at me shyly and asked,

“Lady Luisa… may I ask what my name means?”

“Uh……”

It doesn’t mean anything. I literally just thought of it.

‘But I can’t hurt a child’s feelings.’

After agonizing for a moment, I chose to run away. Mimicking Ribael’s usual sly smile, I lowered my voice and spoke mysteriously.

“It’s a secret. I’ll tell you when you become an adult.”

“Yes! Hehe.”

As if you’ll still be sticking by my side until adulthood.