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Chapter 19
“How do you know whether I dislike sharing a bed with you, my Lady?”
His voice didn’t particularly sound displeased with Amber’s suggestion, so she felt somewhat relieved.
“Of course I know. You dislike me, don’t you, Duke?”
“I don’t—”
“As I’ve said many times, it’s really fine.”
Amber spoke while looking directly at Calix’s face.
Because she had pulled him closer when she made him sit down earlier, the distance between them was close.
“I dislike you too.”
At Amber’s words, Calix’s eyes opened wide.
He pressed his lips tightly shut, as if lost for words, and stared at Amber.
His gaze was so intense and fearsome that Amber felt her body grow warm.
*Is he that shocked?*
Amber, who had thought Calix was fully aware of her feelings, was surprised.
*Come to think of it, this is the first time I’ve said with my own mouth that I dislike him.*
It had been true in both her past life and this one.
In her past life, she had always been walking on eggshells around him and hadn’t dared say she disliked him. And in this life, the feeling was so worn and familiar that she hadn’t thought to bring it up.
*So my attitude seemed strange because I never said I disliked him.*
Now she understood the strange behavior her husband had shown throughout the day.
After all, he was from the East, where it was common for a married woman to obey, respect, and follow her husband. So he probably hadn’t thought that Amber disliked him.
And because he didn’t know that, his attitude toward her had been ambiguous.
*Let me make it clear once and for all.*
Things that seemed perfectly obvious to Amber must have seemed puzzling to her husband.
“Do you… dislike me, my Lady?”
Just as Amber made that decision, Calix asked with perfect timing.
“Yes!”
Amber answered without a moment’s hesitation.
“I dislike you very, very, more than words can express.”
Thinking that being clear would make things more comfortable for both herself and Calix, Amber spoke without restraint.
Calix’s reaction was very different from what Amber had expected. He seemed genuinely shocked. He also seemed flustered.
Amber found his reaction surprising.
Everyone in Thales Ducal Castle knew that they looked at each other like strangers.
*Though that was in my past life.*
But soon enough, it would be the same in this life.
“So please don’t worry about me disliking you.”
Calix pressed his lips tightly shut and did not answer.
Amber didn’t attach much meaning to his silence.
It was entirely Calix’s fault that Amber hadn’t noticed his feelings. Since he always shut his mouth and said nothing when faced with an unfavorable situation, it was only natural that Amber didn’t try to dig deep into his silence.
“So that settles everything, right?”
At Amber’s question, Calix had no choice but to nod.
Amber stretched to relieve her stiff shoulders.
“Then I’ll go to sleep now. I’m tired after so much happened today.”
Amber busily moved to the top of the bed, got settled, and pulled up the duvet.
“Please sleep comfortably as well, Duke.”
The bed in the ducal castle was plenty large. Large enough that no matter how restless their sleeping habits, they could sleep through the night without so much as a fingertip touching.
Covering herself up to her neck and wriggling to the edge of the bed, Amber slowly closed her eyes.
She had been through so much that day and was dead tired. Falling asleep was easy.
She didn’t lie awake feeling unfamiliar, nor did she fail to fall asleep due to tension.
Until she was falsely accused of treason and dragged to the capital, she had spent ten years in this bedroom. So of course it felt familiar.
Soon, Amber’s soft breathing could be heard.
Calix was flustered to see Amber fall asleep so quickly.
He carefully walked around the bed and approached Amber, who was lying on her side. Seeing his wife’s eyelids, which had closed like a butterfly’s wings, and her rising and falling chest, Calix looked utterly lost.
“My Lady…”
He called out to Amber in a very small voice, just in case, but she didn’t move an inch.
“How can you fall asleep and leave me like this…”
Calix sighed deeply and rubbed his face.
That night, Calix could not sleep a single wink.
—
The next day, Amber woke up in a daze.
Perhaps because she had relaxed after sleeping in a comfortable bed for the first time in a long while, her whole body felt heavy and limp.
But her mind was clear.
She could feel the dawn sunlight seeping through the curtains over the window, slowly brightening the room.
“Mmm.”
Amber let out a small, complaining groan and slowly opened her eyes.
As she sat up, the duvet that had been covering her up to her neck fell away, revealing her white nape through the loose nightdress.
Amber rubbed her eyes and checked the spot beside her.
It was empty. When she touched it, it was cool.
*Did he leave already?*
Amber took her hand away without much thought and got out of bed.
Even if Calix had left first, as long as he pretended that they had spent their wedding night together, it didn’t really matter.
Thinking this, she started walking toward the vanity when she saw Calix sitting on the sofa in the corner.
Amber stopped in her tracks without meaning to.
Calix was sitting with his eyes closed, leaning against the backrest. The dawn light streaming through the window illuminated him, making him look like a knight from a story.
Looking at him, Amber felt a strange sensation again, just like the day before.
She tried to figure out what that sensation was, but it was no use.
“Duke?”
Calix opened his eyes as soon as he heard Amber’s voice, as if he hadn’t been asleep. His navy irises caught the light.
“You’re up early.”
His complexion looked perfectly fine, so it didn’t occur to Amber that he had stayed up all night.
“My Lady is up early as well.”
After gazing blankly at Amber for a moment, Calix spoke.
“The knights are leaving for an expedition this morning. I’m going to see them off.”
Amber, who had been about to pull the bell cord, paused and turned her head toward Calix.
“Shall I call a maid…?”
“Of course not. I’ll be going first.”
Calix said as he rose from the sofa. Amber noticed that he was already dressed in a perfect set of outdoor clothes.
Before Amber could ask about his attire, Calix opened the door and left.
Amber pulled the bell cord, and soon Xenia and Luna entered carrying warm water and breakfast.
Sonya, they said, was organizing the belongings Amber had brought from the West.
“Good morning, my Lady!”
Both Xenia and Luna looked genuinely happy to attend to Amber.
With their help, Amber ate breakfast and changed her clothes.
The dress she wore that day was one of the few she had brought with her when she married. It was made of flowing ivory fabric with wide sleeves and a long skirt, fastened with a sash tied just below the chest. It suited Amber very well.
“What did you do with the wedding dress I wore yesterday?”
Amber asked Xenia while Luna fastened the sash.
“We brushed off the mud stains and stored it separately. You can’t imagine how grateful we were that we’re experienced with laundry.”
A wedding dress made of delicate fabric cannot be washed like ordinary cloth; stains must be removed by hand, one by one. And no matter how hard you try, once a stain sets, it doesn’t fade easily.
“If you wish, I could redo the hem and bring it back out?”
“No, that’s fine. I won’t have any use for that dress anymore.”
Her father had spent a fortune of tens of thousands of stars to make that dress, but to Amber, it meant nothing.
In her past life, she had worn it once and never again.
“Ah, but I suppose the jewels and fabric used to decorate the dress could be detached and attached to a hat or something. You girls can have them if you like.”
At Amber’s terribly practical words, Xenia and Luna looked surprised.
“Dismantle it? Even so, it’s a wedding dress…”
“I’m not going to get married again wearing that dress, am I?”
Amber looked genuinely unconcerned. She had something else on her mind.
“Did you have any trouble with Grace or the other maids while retrieving the dress?”
“The butler accompanied us personally. So no one tried to stop us, but…”
Xenia trailed off.
“You received unpleasant looks.”
Just then, Luna finished tying the sash, so Amber had the two maids stand side by side in front of her.
Xenia and Luna hesitated, glancing at each other.
To put it nicely, neither of them had a talent for tattling. To put it badly, they were too kind and couldn’t easily open their mouths even when wronged.
Amber neither urged them to vent their grievances nor excessively soothed them. She simply waited in silence.
Strangely enough, the two maids found courage in Amber’s silence.
It was Xenia who spoke first.
“While we were cleaning the dress, some maids under Grace came and picked a fight with us. But it really was just a few words, and thanks to Heinrich blocking them, nothing worse happened.”
Amber was slightly surprised to hear that Heinrich had personally protected the maids.
His actions would surely be reported to Bella without omission. By protecting the maids, he might have made an enemy of Bella.
*I didn’t expect him to help this actively.*
What had moved Heinrich’s heart?
Amber thought about it, but she couldn’t figure it out.
Amber turned her head toward Luna.
“I want to hear what happened to you too.”
While Xenia had been speaking, Luna had kept her lips tightly shut. From that, Amber guessed that Luna had something she hadn’t said.
“I, I…”
Luna was visibly flustered, confirming Amber’s guess.
Again, Amber smiled gently and waited in silence.
Luna looked at Amber’s smile as if mesmerized, then opened her mouth with a somewhat calmer face.
“A few maids I used to be close with came to see me at night. They asked me… why I had joined my Lady’s service.”
“Did you answer honestly?”
Luna’s face turned red.
“I… I had to tell them. They wouldn’t accept just saying that I’d come to admire my Lady…”
Fearing that Amber would scold her for telling other maids about the special treatment she had received, Luna stammered in fear.
