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Chapter – 19
At my uncharacteristic behavior, he widened his eyes slightly in surprise. I let out a small sigh.
“You must not do something like this again. This time, we were lucky and it was overlooked, but it was truly dangerous. Do you not know why I was invited to this place?”
“…….”
“I know that the young lady is wiser than anyone else. That is why I ask you—please do not do things like this in the future. I say this because I am genuinely worried.”
I removed my hand from her cheek. Then, clasping the young lady’s hand in both of mine, I pleaded earnestly. I wanted her to refrain from reckless actions, to stay safe. As the priest responsible for her education, it was my duty to protect her.
After slowly stroking my hand, the young lady finally spoke.
“Alright. I’ll try not to do things like this next time. I can’t promise I’ll never do it again, though.”
“It’s a relief that you’re at least willing to try. Please promise me.”
I extended my little finger. At my childish gesture, the young lady burst into laughter. She hooked her little finger with mine and shook it up and down.
“Still, it makes me happy to know that you’re this worried about me, Priest. Earlier, your own safety could have been at risk, yet you protected me first.”
“That is because I am the priest currently assigned to you.”
“I think it’s because you like me.”
I shook my head vigorously. There was no way I had acted like that because I liked her. I had only done what was right. What had to be done.
My feelings toward her must not be tainted with personal emotions. I am a priest who has devoted everything to God, and she is a young lady of a noble family whose future shines brightly ahead of her.
Had I still been a noble, harboring feelings for her might have been permitted. But the past was the past. No matter how much one yearned for what could not be undone, nothing would change.
“Young lady, are your feelings toward me sincere? Do you love me?”
“Of course. I always tell you, don’t I? I like you, Priest.”
“Why do you like me?”
“Because you’re cute. You’re fun to tease, handsome, too.”
Her tone was light, as always. If her feelings toward me were merely a joke, then it was fine to keep pushing her away like this. But if her feelings were genuine, then this relationship could not continue.
“I am not joking. Young lady, I am a priest. I can never return your feelings for the rest of my life. There are many men in this world who are better than me. Someone like you will surely meet a wonderful person and live a happy life.”
The smile faded from her face. This was not something she was unaware of. All priests of the Terium Empire were forbidden from marriage and romance.
Unless they abandoned the priesthood, those who loved while remaining priests all met ruin.
It did not end with merely being stripped of their position. They lived their entire lives branded with a scarlet letter, and some were even exiled from the Terium Empire.
I wished that she would never fall into despair because of loving me. In the past, in the present, and in the future—I wished only for her happiness.
“Even if you’ve come of age, you are still young. Since you grew up at the academy, you likely haven’t had many chances to meet good men. That’s why you mistake simple fondness for love.”
“You really don’t know anything about your own heart, Priest. Well, that’s normal. Humans are ignorant creatures who can’t see even an inch ahead.”
She stepped forward and rested her hands on the terrace railing. Beyond the horizon, the mountains were swallowing the sun.
“I know that resisting fate is a meaningless act. So please, Priest, accept it already.”
“Young lady, but—”
If spilling the wine was fate, then hadn’t you already resisted fate?
Before I could continue, she clapped her hands lightly, as if forcibly cutting me off.
“That’s enough talk. Come on, let’s go back. If we don’t return quickly, people might misunderstand again, Priest. You don’t want to be misunderstood, do you?”
Without waiting for my answer, she opened the terrace door. The atmosphere of the party looked far brighter than before. Thankfully, it seemed that everyone had already forgotten the earlier incident.
The moment we stepped out from the terrace, Lady Anthea came running toward us from afar. Perhaps because she was short, she really did look like a little mouse scurrying over, just as the young lady had described.
“Young lady!”
Tearfully, she wrapped her arms tightly around the young lady’s neck. Spoken kindly, it was an expression of affection; spoken harshly, it was a complete lack of decorum. It certainly was not behavior befitting the fiancée of the Crown Prince.
The young lady looked down at Lady Anthea with a bewildered expression.
“Lady Anthea, what is this all of a sudden?”
“I was worried! I thought something terrible might have happened to you. Did the priest scold you a lot? Are you okay?”
The one who had poured wine onto His Highness’s face was the young lady, yet Lady Anthea was worrying about her. I felt a headache coming on.
At least it was a relief that Lady Anthea was not her enemy. But if the future Crown Princess was this soft-hearted, what would become of the empire?
“Catherine, I’d appreciate it if you worried about me instead of the young lady.”
At some point, His Highness the Crown Prince had approached us with an awkward smile.
“I’ll worry about you later, Your Highness! Getting wine spilled on you won’t kill you, after all!”
“By that logic, Lady Anthea, being scolded by me won’t kill the young lady either.”
“I suppose that’s true….”
I began to sincerely worry about the future of the Terium Empire.
After leaving the terrace, the young lady was caught up in conversation with Lady Anthea for quite some time.
By the time the moon rose into the sky, the party came to an end. Exhaustion was clearly written on the young lady’s face. Though some stayed overnight at the imperial palace due to the late hour, the young lady and I decided to return to the temple.
In the carriage, we passed the time with trivial conversation—more accurately, I listened to the young lady’s complaints.
She grumbled about how nobles only talked about pointless things, how foolish men kept approaching her and made her want to punch them, how uncomfortable the dress was and how she wanted to take it off immediately…. I barely managed to stop her when she actually tried to remove her dress inside the carriage.
As soon as we arrived at the temple, the young lady headed to her room, and I went to the chapel. Too much had happened today. I wanted to organize my tangled thoughts by offering a prayer to Ataras.
Perhaps because it was so late, the chapel was silent. Most of the priests would already be asleep.
Relying on a single candle, I stood at the front of the chapel. Moonlight filtered in through the stained glass. Inside the chapel, where I thought no one would be, I saw a pale silhouette.
At first, I narrowed my eyes, unable to tell who it was. But as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I recognized the figure.
“Your Holiness?”
“It has been a while, Johan. Have you been well?”
“Yes, Your Holiness. I have been passing each day safely under Ataras’s grace.”
Good heavens—why was His Holiness here at such a late hour? Even if the Salute Temple was within the capital, it was still quite far from the Central Temple. I had heard nothing about his visit. Moreover, there wasn’t a single holy knight guarding him. Something was strange.
“I heard about the incident at today’s banquet, where wine was spilled on His Highness. I came because I was concerned.”
“How did Your Holiness hear about that…?”
Instead of answering, His Holiness smiled meaningfully. The incident had occurred only a few hours ago.
No matter that it was His Holiness, it would be difficult to hear of an imperial matter so quickly. I tilted my head slightly.
“Considering your parents, it is only natural that you would feel that way. You did well. However, now is not the time. In order for our believers to spread God’s will far and wide, we must first lay the groundwork.”
“Your Holiness.”
“Johan, do you still suffer nightmares every night because of that incident?”
The moment I heard those words, the color drained from my face. My breath caught.
Blood-soaked visions flashed through my mind. Raging flames. Charred corpses burned beyond recognition. I screamed as I shook my parents’ unmoving bodies. Even now, the sensation of my throat burning from the acrid, scorching smoke felt vividly real.
Yet the surroundings were eerily silent. No one answered my screams.
Of course not.
Everyone in the estate—including the servants—was dead.
Among my family, only one survived.
Me.
