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Chapter 78
“ I wondered why you insisted on standing in the rain—turns out you were hiding your tears with raindrops.”
“…You caught me. That’s right. When it rains, I become a faucet.”
I didn’t even feel like wiping my tears, so I just laughed foolishly.
A woman crying and laughing while drenched in the rain—unmistakably the figure of a lunatic.
There’s a kind of history to why I do this every time it rains.
At first, I cried because I felt wronged. Even though I devoted myself entirely to rebuilding Blansk after the war, the people of the territory hated me. I knew their hatred was justified, and yet it still hurt. For someone who was once admired at social gatherings to suddenly face the contempt of the masses—it wasn’t easy.
As time passed, I cried from helplessness. No matter how much effort I poured into governing, I could never truly reach them. And I shouldn’t reach them. I am the bloodline of an invading king. My hand could never be a source of comfort. All I could do was repay in silence.
Once I realized all of this was the karma I had to bear, the punishment I had to endure, I started crying for no reason at all. I hated crouching alone in my room, weeping whenever it rained, so I began standing on the rooftop instead, letting the storm drench me.
When lightning flashed, my shoulders trembled. When thunder boomed, my whole body quaked. I was terrified it would strike me dead, but I endured it. I thought—maybe if I endured this, someday I’d be forgiven before death.
I had been a bystander for too long. I drained every sweet drop from war, and only at the very last moment, when I saw its raw face, did I finally stop the king’s rampage.
Still, at least I saved Padon Island. At least this terrifyingly beautiful man was alive and safe with me…
“ I won’t ask why you’re crying.”
The Grand Duke spoke.
His gaze burned unbearably hot. It felt like if it touched me, I’d be scorched.
If last night hadn’t happened, I probably wouldn’t even recognize this warmth.
His hot hand suddenly seized my shoulder. He lifted me up from the railing. My rain-soaked shoulder pressed against his crisp uniform, dampening it, but he didn’t seem to care.
The heavy downpour pounded against his umbrella. Listening to it, I looked up at him. I remembered last night, when we hid together in the narrow gap between walls. His breath was just as close now, yet the air around us felt different—more humid, sticky.
My heart raced wildly, though no one was chasing us.
His strong arm settled over my shoulder, slowly pulling me into his embrace. Very slowly—so gently that it felt soft, almost warm.
I closed my eyes.
“Thank you for not asking. I don’t even know why I’m crying anymore.”
The tears didn’t stop. If anything, being comforted only made me cry harder. Using that as an excuse, I sobbed against the Grand Duke’s chest.
“ I can hide you too.”
“…”
“ If you’re in my arms, no one will know you’re crying. I’m taller than you, with broader shoulders and chest—I can be a solid shield.”
…So this is what he meant, when he said he wanted me to see him as a man?
That when I was struggling, he wanted me to lean on him?
“…Shall we go to the bedroom?”
The words slipped out impulsively.
I wanted to test him. To see if he really was drawn to me. If everything he confessed to the pawnshop owner yesterday was truly sincere.
The Grand Duke didn’t answer easily. His violet eyes, fixed on me, trembled without direction.
It must have been too sudden—after all, a woman crying in the rain suddenly suggesting the bedroom would throw anyone off.
“…Are you asking for comfort?”
“Can you give it?”
Instead of replying, he smiled faintly.
He pulled off his gloves and took my hand. My rain-chilled fingers slowly warmed in his grasp.
We descended the stairs together and entered my bedroom.
The Grand Duke summoned the maids and ordered towels.
“Prepare bathwater as well. I’ll attend to her myself.”
The maids curtsied and withdrew.
He gently patted away the rainwater dripping from my hair and clothes.
When the bath was ready, he lifted me in his arms and carried me inside.
“…I’ll undress.”
After all, a man like him wouldn’t be skilled at removing women’s clothing.
I unfastened the buttons myself. My soaked, heavy garments fell one by one at my feet.
Soon only my undergarments remained.
The wet fabric clung to my skin, revealing nearly everything. Yet the Grand Duke simply watched in silence.
Some strange stubbornness rose in me, and I stripped away the rest without hesitation.
It was my first time exposing myself like this, but I didn’t feel particularly embarrassed.
His eyes slowly traced over me, as if touching with sight alone. Starting from my neck, sliding down my curves—until his brow furrowed at a certain point.
His gaze darkened. Then his eyelids shut tight, as though suppressing something unbearable.
…He must have seen the scar.
Without a word, he supported my waist and legs, placing me into the bath.
The hot water enveloped me, already making my body feel languid.
He lathered soap onto a sponge, the scent of freesia filling the room, and gently washed my hands, my hair, everything—meticulously tender.
When the bath ended, the maids brought fresh water. The Grand Duke rinsed the last traces of foam from me, then lifted me out and carefully dried every inch of skin.
I felt strange. Like a helpless infant in his care.
He reached for the robe placed beside the towel.
“…Why the robe? We’re just going to end up tangled in bed anyway.”
“I have no intention of comforting a sick person in that way.”
“….”
So he thought of me as someone wounded?
“You’re not the type to suddenly want me overnight.”
He smiled gently as he said it.
Two possibilities remained: either his attraction to me had been a lie… or his self-control was simply extraordinary.
“…Then at least allow me a kiss.”
He suddenly knelt on one knee.
I thought he meant to kiss my hand, but he didn’t take it. Where, then—?
He leaned forward, encircled my bare waist softly.
Then his lips pressed lightly… against my scarred side.
“Ah—why there…!”
Startled, I shuddered violently.
The touch of his lips against the long scar was vivid, sharp. My nerves jolted alive. My eyes squeezed shut.
Now I understood. That was where his gaze had stopped earlier.
The Grand Duke said nothing. He simply dressed me in the robe, carried me to the bedroom, laid me neatly on the bed, pulled the blanket up to my chin—
—and left.
That night, I was consumed by a fever unlike anything I’d ever known.
I was bedridden for a whole week.
I’m usually healthy. I’d never been so sick I thought I might die. That made it even harder to endure.
Every time I opened my eyes, my vision swam. The Grand Duke’s face hovered before me—hallucination, or reality, I couldn’t tell.
I survived only by swallowing spoonfuls of lukewarm porridge forced past my lips, buried in bed.
Of course, I couldn’t visit the pawnshop.
When I regained a sliver of clarity, I asked Katarina about things. Though I hadn’t given her any orders, she had managed the pawnshop by herself.
“…And the Grand Duke? Has he come by?”
“Only once. He just asked about progress and left quickly. But the pawnshop lady told him not to come for a while, since you were busy.”
“…And from Vera?”
“Yes. She’s been rescued safely and is on her way back. They’re coming by carriage from Bedef. This is fresh news, so I haven’t informed the master yet.”
A deep sigh of relief washed over me.
At last, I could breathe again.
I trusted Vera, but I had still feared the possibility of failure.
“…That’s such a relief.”
“Indeed. Now it’s time to show the Grand Duke his place.”
Katarina still believed he was lying. Of course—since I hadn’t shared everything we talked about.
“That girl—where should Vera bring her when they arrive?”
“…Tell them to come to the pawnshop basement first. I want to see her face myself.”
“Yes, I’ll pass that along.”
Katarina rose briskly.
“…You must have been exhausted, handling the pawnshop alone and still caring for me. Thank you, Katarina.”
“Lady Alisa, what are you saying?”
“Hm?”
“The one who nursed you… wasn’t me. It was the Grand Duke.”
