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Chapter 4
In the morning, the Empress and Helene came to visit. The Empress was probably here to “heal” after seeing me sick.
“Laila, are you alright?”
Golden hair neatly pinned up caught the sunlight. Her saint-like, angelic appearance gave me a strange sense of déjà vu.
I looked up at the Empress and gave a small nod.
“Thanks to Your Majesty’s concern, I’m much better now…”
“Oh dear, your voice has no strength.”
The Empress lowered her eyes slightly and gently grasped my hair that had fallen over the blanket.
Helene, standing beside her, looked like she wanted to place her hand on me but kept clenching and unclenching her fingers in agitation.
Seeing how desperate she was to use healing magic on me made my chest itch.
Helene, who had been looking down absentmindedly, flinched when our eyes met. She seemed startled that I had been watching her all along.
I wanted to comfort her, who looked so helpless.
“Sister.”
“……”
“I’m okay.”
Helene bit her lip tightly. Her lower lip turned pale.
“I really don’t hurt at all.”
My attempt to reassure her only made Helene’s eyes turn red.
What kind of emotions was she feeling to look at me like that, as if she were in pain herself?
I looked at the two beautiful women, similar yet completely different in atmosphere, and thought:
This is all so annoying.
I just wanted to quickly exit my role as the neglected imperial princess. If I disappeared, everyone would be happy anyway.
Let’s all live happily. And never meet again.
I began serious preparation for running away. First, I wrote down the conditions for where I would live.
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Far enough that the Imperial Palace cannot find me
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A place with many shops and restaurants
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Not too cold and not too hot
Wait a second. Aren’t there tons of places like this? Why am I so modest?
Once I listed the conditions, I felt oddly happy—there were more options than expected.
The problem was that I didn’t know the geography at all.
With neither palace maps nor maids I could trust, there was no one who could tell me where a good place to live was.
“…sigh.”
I groaned, thinking about Laila’s completely useless network of connections, and pulled at my hair.
In the end, I headed to the imperial library as my next best option. I planned to find maps and travel books there.
The library was inside the Imperial Academy building. It was an institution that taught history, philosophy, accounting, magic, geography, martial arts, horseback riding, piano, and many other subjects—but sadly, Laila could not attend any of them.
The Empress had declared that because her body was weak, she should rest instead of studying.
What a hypocrite.
She clearly knew I was suffering from poison she herself had given me, yet acted like that anyway.
Golden sunlight poured over the red carpeted hallway.
As I walked toward the deepest part of the building where the library was, I passed three lecture halls.
I could hear a girl reciting poetry in a clear voice, the sound of a bright piano melody, and two boys fiercely debating war from opposing sides.
Looking through the gaps in the doors, I suddenly wondered:
If the 14-year-old Laila had come here instead of me, how would she have felt?
Would she have felt wronged, being left alone in an isolated palace despite having greater magical talent than anyone else?
My chest tightened slightly as I absentmindedly brushed the hair that fell over it. Maybe because I had possessed this body, my pity for Laila kept growing.
Why are you such a tragic character?
The imperial library was far larger than I expected. It was like these kids lived only by reading books—shelves two stories high were packed tightly with volumes.
I pulled out a book and skimmed it. The language here strangely used alphabet-like symbols. It wasn’t English, but I could still understand it.
It felt as if Laila’s body automatically interpreted the text.
Thank goodness.
Otherwise I would have ended up unable to read or speak at all.
Thinking about Laila having no one to help her made me shudder. Escape would have been impossible.
Just imagining staying in this palace forever made my shoulders tense.
I shook off useless thoughts and focused on finding a good place to spend money.
In the geography section, I pulled out a book.
According to the map, the Belliana Empire was a peninsula surrounded by warm seas like Greece.
To the north was the Kylon Empire. Most of it was mountainous, famous for lakes and valleys, and home to various types of monsters.
The temperature difference between the two countries was striking.
Then I noticed a town right on the border.
It was a trade hub between the two nations, with a well-developed commercial district. It was said that food from all over the continent could be tasted there.
“Food from all over the continent.”
This… sounds exactly like my style.
Noel
Even the name was appealing.
A lively town filled with the excitement before the New Year came to mind.
I hugged the illustrated travel book about Noel to my chest.
With so many books here, taking one wouldn’t even be noticeable, right?
While wondering how I could steal it discreetly, a thought suddenly struck me, and I clapped my hands without realizing it.
Couldn’t I just duplicate the book with magic?
I closed my eyes, placed my hand on the book, and slowly poured in mana.
The book split into two.
Wow! This is seriously overpowered. Laila, why have you been living so quietly all this time? Such wasted potential…
I’ll make good use of it for you.
Feeling a strange sense of responsibility, I left the library.
By the time I came out, the sun was already setting.
Outside the corridor window, the sky glowed in a soft orange hue.
The imperial palace surrounded by pale green shrubs looked like paradise today—no, even more beautiful than usual.
“Princess Helene, fighting!”
At the horseback riding grounds, my half-siblings and noble children were cheering someone on.
Following their gaze, I saw a goddess-like girl riding a white horse.
Her fair face, tinged with peach-colored blush, made it hard to tell she was real and not a doll.
Golden hair flowed down to her waist, glowing under the sunset, and her emerald eyes sparkled as she smiled.
Even from afar, her bright energy was dazzling.
I remembered something I had once heard—that children who are loved grow up with a natural brightness.
So this is what a loved child looks like.
I stared at Helene in a daze, feeling a strange sense of déjà vu. I envied that light-filled smile that neither I nor Laila could ever have.
People often say you should avoid those from troubled families, claiming they have a twisted way of seeing the world.
They don’t realize how painful those words can be.
People had said such things to me too. Of course, they probably didn’t mean harm—I must have looked like someone who grew up in a good, loving home.
Parents who met in medical school, married, and had children who all entered medicine after studying diligently in a loving household.
But I was not part of that family.
The sky gradually turned violet. My reflection became clearer in the window.
Long silver hair, pale face, and light violet eyes.
A frail body with shoulders habitually hunched forward, making Laila look even more delicate.
It was ironic for me to think this after just complaining about prejudice, but looking at Laila’s face, I thought:
The face of an unloved girl is truly fragile and pitiful.
Maybe because it resembled my childhood self.
I wanted to love Laila.
Fwoosh—
As all the chandelier candles were lit, the academy auditorium brightened.
Every quarter, students held performances here.
Seeing the red velvet seats and large stage, I could already imagine noble ladies watching their children perform.
No matter the world, parents enjoying their children’s talents seemed to be universal.
I walked onto the stage and sat in front of the grand piano.
Ding—
I pressed a key. A clear note rang out, and my lips curved slightly.
The royal piano was well maintained.
Has it been six months?
Unable to contain my excitement, I placed my hands on the keys.
A bright, lively melody filled the hall.
It was a cover of “The Town Where the Sea Is Visible” from my life before.
I was a piano nerd. I had even wanted to study music in college.
If I had known I would end up like this, I would have chosen music school.
Why did I try so hard to be acknowledged by them? It wasn’t my fault I wasn’t loved—I didn’t need to try so hard.
As the familiar melody flowed, memories from before I possessed this body surged back.
Other people adapt quickly when they fall into a novel, but I still couldn’t get used to this world.
That’s why whenever I saw Piane or Helene, I felt strangely calm regardless of their emotions.
The piano was the same.
Being immersed in familiar music slowly filled the emptiness in my chest.
Laila was too unfamiliar to me.
I didn’t know anything about this girl, so I didn’t know how I was supposed to act.
In fact, even this moment was a future that didn’t exist in the original story.
I had so many questions about her.
Why did she die despite having such power? She could have healed even the Empress’s poison herself.
The more I thought about it, the more I reached one conclusion.
Laila committed suicide.
