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Chapter : 05
Harten’s words pulled me out of my thoughts.
Once again, he was staring at me as if he could see straight through me.
If there was one slight difference from before, it was this: this time, it wasn’t instinctive attraction—he was observing me as a person.
So now you’re finally curious about what Eani Nassel is like after losing her memories.
I met Harten’s gray eyes for a moment, then slowly opened my mouth.
“Just… I was thinking how peaceful everything feels right now.”
“!”
As if he hadn’t expected that answer, Harten’s eyes widened.
I turned my gaze away from him and looked out at the sea beyond the balcony.
The emerald-colored ocean sparkled in the sunlight as always, welcoming me.
“When I first opened my eyes, the unfamiliar surroundings were so frightening. But the moment I saw this sea, my heart warmed. It felt like the ocean itself was comforting me.”
“……”
“I’m happy I can see this beautiful scenery together with you, Young Duke.”
Well—those words were a careful mix of truth and lies.
When I naturally looked back at Harten, his face showed a complicated swirl of emotions.
Watching him, I took a sip of tea.
Is he turning my words over in his mind?
Honestly, there was no such thing as “peace” between Harten and Eani.
And yet, paradoxically, Harten often felt a strange sense of stability whenever he looked at her.
In the original story, Harten recalled their first meeting like this:
“Harten could never forget the shiver that ran through his entire body the moment his eyes first met Eani’s.
He had lived his entire life solely as the heir of House Seind.
In childhood, he endured his parents’ harsh demands and control. As an adult, he had no choice but to ensure that those who sought to tear him apart never dared to look down on him.
But living that way, he eventually lost the human being known as ‘Harten Seind’ completely.
There were times when he wasn’t even sure if he was truly breathing.
The shock he felt when he saw her in those days made him feel alive.
It felt as though only the two of them were left in this world.
For the first time, he cast aside the responsibilities and pressure that had clung to him like a shadow, and felt a sense of liberation.
In that moment, Harten felt a most peculiar kind of peace.
And so he wanted to see her again.
He wanted to meet her gaze and talk with her.
‘Perhaps he even harbored hope,’
—hope that if he stayed by her side, he too could live as a proper human being.
Of course, that hope was soon shattered beyond all recognition.”
Oh my, now that I think about it again, that’s a little different from the peace we usually imagine, isn’t it?
…Well, whatever.
Either way, the destination I’m heading toward is the same.
Only when he was with Eani could Harten escape the burdens that constantly suffocated him.
He liked that simple, blind sensation where all other choices disappeared and he could focus solely on Eani Nassel.
Unfortunately, as misunderstandings piled up, he’s come to find that very sensation unpleasant now.
Still, it was true that early in the story, Harten wanted to get along with Eani peacefully.
The problem was that both of them were terribly immature and clumsy when it came to dealing with people.
Just look at him now.
His lips were tightly sealed like that.
Even though there must be so many things he wants to ask me.
Perhaps the Harten of the past also became lost in thought like this and fell silent at crucial moments—without ever imagining what the other person might think in that silence.
Well, what can you do?
I’ll just have to gently coax this awkward man along.
I’m not the real Eani, who was hopeless with relationships, after all.
Smiling quietly to myself, I lightly changed the subject.
“I heard roughly how my ankle ended up like this.”
Caught off guard, Harten flinched.
From where I sat, I reached out and lightly touched my ankle.
“They said it was an unavoidable accident.”
If it was caused by someone, it still counted as an accident, right?
Harten’s gaze followed to my ankle.
“An unavoidable accident,” he murmured bitterly.
From that murmur, I clearly decided the direction I needed to take.
Harten Seind is strongly on guard against me right now.
I could understand why.
The person he’d torn into again and again suddenly lost her memories.
And on top of that, his own obsession—something he thought had vanished—seemed to be resurfacing.
Of course he’d feel uneasy.
But just as much as that, he feels guilty about this ankle.
If I used that, I could loosen his guard easily enough.
I withdrew my hand from my ankle and met Harten’s eyes.
“But I heard that thanks to your consideration, I’ve been able to recuperate comfortably on this island. I’m truly grateful.”
“……It wasn’t really consideration. I just did what I was supposed to do.”
“Hehe. Even so, I’m very thankful.”
I lowered my voice, as if sharing a secret.
“And honestly, I don’t really mind that my ankle is like this.”
“You don’t… mind?”
“Yes! With Elin and the other children around, it’s not inconvenient at all, and it doesn’t actually hurt. Besides, thanks to this ankle, I get to stay on Tadibna Island—and I like that. I really love this island!”
“……”
Harten said nothing, simply staring at me with an expression that clearly said he couldn’t believe it.
I began counting off a few more reasons I was fine, folding my fingers one by one, then slowly looked back at him.
“Most of all, you came to see me, Young Duke, and all my anxiety just vanished.”
“!”
“I didn’t realize it myself, but I think ever since I lost my memories, I’ve been relying on you without even noticing.”
“Hah.”
Harten let out a hollow laugh, as if he were dumbfounded.
“That’s the most meaningless thing I’ve heard all year.”
“Hmm? But it’s true. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have been so happy to see you when we first met, would I?”
“……”
At my words, Harten sharply turned his head away and frowned.
But judging by how the tips of his ears had turned red, he seemed quite pleased.
I looked at him warmly and curved my lips into a gentle smile.
“So if you’ve been feeling guilty about my ankle… you don’t need to.”
After all, Harten Seind wouldn’t be able to resist the instinct that drew him to me.
If I left him alone, he’d cling to me on his own.
But to get what I wanted, I had to take one more step beyond that.
I can’t let him feel like he’s being forced to want me, like last time.
That would just be repeating the past.
And since I knew this ankle wasn’t actually his fault, the lies came smoothly.
“I don’t think it’s because of you at all.”
At that, he stiffened.
Without looking at me, he fell into thought for a moment, then slowly spoke.
“What if your ankle really did end up that way because of me?”
“What?”
“If it wasn’t an accident—if it was entirely my fault that you’re limping now. Would you still not blame me?”
Even as he tested me with those words, Harten never turned his gaze toward me.
It seemed he didn’t have the courage to hear the answer face-to-face.
Smiling inwardly, I willingly gave him the answer he wanted.
“Even if that were the case, I wouldn’t resent you. Because I can see that you’re doing everything you can to fix my ankle.”
“!”
“I don’t know what kind of answer I would’ve given before I lost my memories. But now I can see it—your efforts, and your heart. That’s why I don’t feel resentment.”
“……”
“Harten.”
When I called his name, his hand resting on the table clenched tightly, clearly startled.
The original Eani had always called him Young Duke, so this must have been the first time he’d heard this.
I slowly closed my eyes, then opened them again, and reached out with both hands, placing them over his clenched fist.
His large hand, filling mine completely, gave a sharp twitch.
