TFSG 104

Chapter 104

As the wind blew again, I smiled faintly.

Yeah, it’s fine. Even if it was only for a short while, I got to have a dad.

“Thank you.”

“……”

“Uncle.”

Uncle Heukbiwon’s eyes widened.

Countless emotions flashed through his big eyes — regret, tenderness, and affection toward me most of all.

But soon, like the dependable uncle he was, he quickly erased his feelings and smiled, lifting me up high.

“Ah!”

His laughter filled my ears, as though he were delighted to give me a piggyback ride.

“Did you know? I always wanted to have a daughter.”

I was about to say something but closed my mouth.

Because I suddenly remembered my aunt — who had died while pregnant with their second child.

“Hang in there. You’re the one who brought hope to someone’s life full of despair, my dear niece.”

For the first time in three days, I felt a little better. Actually, maybe a lot better.

* * *

After parting ways with my uncle, I went straight to my father’s house.

Brother Gye-won was terribly worried when he found out where I was going, but… I couldn’t stay gloomy forever.

I hope Bi-yu can do what she truly wants. And I hope it all works out.

That’s what Raon said when he saw me off. It surprised me, and I was grateful — those were exactly the words I’d needed to hear.

He’s still a kid, but he speaks so maturely.

Soon, I’d have to sit down with Uncle and talk about how we should educate Raon.

Though honestly, neither Uncle nor my other uncle are very reliable…

My father had been the only one who seemed rational and balanced among them — that was comforting.

My younger uncle had a bit of a temper, so I was always worried he might actually beat someone up if he got angry while working.

As for my older uncle — he was sly and still not fully recovered from his bouts of mania. So, I always had to consider timing when asking him to handle anything important.

Not that my younger uncle was much better.

Guess there’s no helping it. I’ll just have to keep working hard on their treatment.

I had to assume Father wouldn’t be around.

When I first decided not to look for him, I’d planned to rely on those two to handle things anyway. I’d simply come full circle.

At last, I stopped walking.

Even so, I had come here to finish things properly.

“Ah…”

Father was standing alone in the yard.

I’d thought he would be by the tree, but I came here anyway because I needed closure.

This was where I’d last been with him.

I’d only meant to stop by briefly… but I guess it didn’t matter.

“Hello.”

When I spoke, Father turned his head sharply — his expression one of shock, as if he’d just seen something impossible.

Why does he look like that?

He’d apparently gone to see Uncle every night, and even visited my other uncle yesterday.

Why, though?

No, better not to wonder.

“I’m sorry for visiting so suddenly, sir.”

I spoke clearly on purpose. A light breeze brushed by.

“…No need to apologize. Really, none at all.”

His voice held a trace of confusion.

It struck me — how different his tone was from how I remembered.

Well, at least I wasn’t crying this time.

‘…Your dad talks differently now. Kind of like how he used to when he was alone with your mom.’

That’s what Uncle had told me after Father had visited him one night.

So I supposed it must be true.

Now that I think about it, yeah — it’s similar to how he looked and spoke in my memories.

When someone loses their memories, do they revert to an earlier version of themselves?

I realized how much I didn’t know.

“A few days ago, I’m sorry… I cried then. I was a mess. I must have startled you.”

“……”

“I got lost.”

Yeah — I was just lost for a little while.

“I got lost and ended up here.”

I’d tell myself it was all just a dream about our memories. That way, it hurt less.

“But there’s a reason I came back today.”

When I first met him, Father had shown a strong aversion — even hostility — toward physicians and apothecaries.

How would he react now?

“I’m a physician. A very skilled one.”

“……”

“That day, I came to diagnose you.”

After thinking deeply about what Uncle had told me, I realized he’d been wrong.

Whether or not I had information about the illness made a huge difference in treatment.

And the method I’d used to heal Father wasn’t something a normal doctor could do — I’d used part of my life span to do it.

Even I didn’t fully understand what that entailed or what side effects it might cause.

At the time, I’d just been desperate.

So I should’ve given him a proper diagnosis afterward. But I hadn’t.

I’d ignored my instincts as a doctor — that was my failure alone.

I got carried away.

Even if he wasn’t my real father, I’d been happy.

Happy to see him slowly regaining bits of memory.

Happy to see him try to act like a father to me.

Now that I faced him again, I realized I’d lost the one thing I’d always been proud of as a doctor — my objectivity.

No matter how harsh life got, I’d always held onto that pride.

But Father… he’d shaken that. He really was amazing.

“You probably don’t remember, but before you lost your memories, you allowed me to diagnose you.”

I’ll admit it.

“Will you let me examine you once more?”

After this, I’d let him go for good.

I didn’t want to heal him again by spending my life, only to see him love me and then forget me all over again.

Call it cold if you must.

…but this is my fourth life. Haven’t I already waited and tried enough?

“…Is that all you need?”

I flinched — his voice was calm, without resistance. I nodded slowly.

I didn’t know why he so easily offered his body to a stranger.

Maybe he knew a diagnosis couldn’t hurt him.

Or maybe he was just confident — after all, he was a powerful wind mage. What could I possibly do to him?

“Go ahead.”

…Still, I couldn’t quite get used to this.

He’d given permission, but the kindness in his tone made me uneasy.

Kind, even without memories — what a sinful man he was.

“…Thank you.”

Of course, there were strange things about this.

Like how he didn’t ask who I was after I suddenly appeared.

Or how he didn’t even question my claim of being a doctor.

For a moment, I wondered if maybe he’d remembered something… but then I shook my head.

If he had, he would’ve come to find me.

No, stop thinking about useless things.

Focus. I dipped my hand into the water I’d brought.

A familiar wave of power spread, wrapping around him.

A diagnosis shows me only the information I want to see.

Before, I’d only focused on how much better his condition had gotten since we met.

I hadn’t really checked his past medical history.

That was my failure — letting my emotions cloud my professionalism.

As I carefully examined him now, I slowly smiled.

…It’s true.

The answer was in his medical history — just as Uncle had said, and just as Mother once told him.

My mother must have been an even greater doctor than me. I could only barely understand what she had already known.

I closed my eyes tightly.

Even as I smiled, tears threatened to fall.

So… he really did forget me because he loved me. That’s just cruel.

Yes, it was cruel — to both of us.

I ended the diagnosis neatly.

“Thank you for your cooperation.”

I bowed politely, keeping my tone formal. I didn’t look at his face.

“…Is it an illness that can be cured?”

It was the gentlest voice I’d heard from him yet. My shoulders trembled as I bowed deeper.

“No. I’m sorry. I don’t think I can cure it.”

No more tears came. Only exhaustion. But that was fine — it would end today.

“But someday… I’ll cure you. When I find a way, I’ll come back.”

Even though he’d lost his memories, I would still keep my promise — as a physician.

I should go home.

Even if only briefly, I’d seen my father — a man who loved me and held me warmly.

Even if I were to regress again, I’d thought maybe I’d stay here and live quietly.

But that had been a mistake.

I’d made up my mind. Rather than watch him forget me over and over, I’d go home.

I might not have family there, but I had friends who cherished me like one.

Uncle, my other uncle, Brother Gye-won — I knew they all loved me deeply. I was grateful, but…

I couldn’t stay here anymore, trapped in this endless cycle of remembering and losing.

I must have really longed for a family of my own.

Like a child.

“Please… stay healthy. Thank you.”

I bowed once more and turned away.

Step by step, I walked forward, pressing my feet firmly into the ground. I needed to get back to Uncle’s house — we’d have dinner together.

Then I’d arrange to meet with the family head. I should probably ask Uncle to handle my escort.

That was when a shadow fell across my path.

I looked up.

Father was standing in front of me, blocking my way.

“…I don’t know why,” he said, his expression a mix of coldness and confusion,

“but I feel like I shouldn’t let you go.”