TESL 22

Chapter 22

“People really have to hit rock bottom at least once…”

I muttered absentmindedly, staring at the ceiling.

“Only then do you have nothing left but to climb back up.”

These were the words my father, Duke Wildenbistone, once said to me, patting my shoulder after I had been dumped and shut myself in at home, refusing to meet anyone.

Personally, I think it’s a profound saying. It actually helped me pull myself together many times…

“But the question is… how far down is my bottom?”

And whether I could even climb back up.

I sniffled loudly.

I’m in the Imperial Palace right now.

To be exact, I’m in a room near the inner quarters. I think it was next to the Mirror Room on the third floor.

Truthfully, this part of the palace is so restricted that only His Majesty can enter it. Even though I’d been stirring up trouble in the palace for the past twelve years, I could never come here before.

Ever since the emperor’s knights politely escorted me here, I’ve been confined to this room.

The room has a soft bed and lots of books that I like.

Even a limited-edition collection of dolls by the capital’s craftsman Francis, which I adored until I was sixteen, was here.

I hadn’t managed to get them before… I had thrown them all away, thinking I should act more grown-up, but now I missed them terribly. I even felt like playing with them again.

But I’m not so out of my mind that I would touch them now. I fully understand my position. In fact, speaking for myself:

“I am a criminal about to be executed for insulting the Emperor.”

…Am I not?

Ah, just saying it aloud makes it hurt even more.

Anyway, I’ve committed such crimes, so now is not the time to get distracted by comfortable, indulgent things.

I should be lying flat on the floor, like a proper criminal, reflecting and repenting. Exactly like now.

Ah, I am truly a child in peril.

I lay flat, blinking up at the ceiling and looking at the paintings above me.

The ceiling is adorned with golden vine decorations, and beautiful paintings summarizing the mythology of the Zahard Empire are drawn there. That’s… an eagle… that’s… a white serpent… those are the monsters summoned by the white serpent… and the sorcerers who defeated them… that’s magical energy…

“Beautiful…”

I sniffled again, though truthfully, no matter how beautiful, it didn’t really register in my eyes.

Hmm… no, I should still try to see it. I sighed pitifully and muttered again.

“Let me take it all in… This is probably one of the last sights I’ll see before I die.”

Right. I should at least look. After all, I’m about to vanish at the hands of the Emperor, having insulted him at the tender age of nineteen, so it makes sense to take in every last detail.

I tried to observe the ceiling slowly. Okay, I’ve seen most of it. Even so, seeing the palace before dying feels like a small luxury. I could go now and…

No, wait, there’s one thing left.

My will.

I struggled to sit up from the floor where I had been lying flat.

“Ah… my will… I need to write my will.”

Right. I have to write it. How shocked my family would be when they find out. Of course, if I leave it like this, the Pacific Times or some paper might grab it and run a headline like: “Shocking Discovery! Girl Who Spoke Rudely to the Emperor Leaves Will!”

I walked over to the tea table, where cookies and cakes were neatly arranged. Ah, I noticed it earlier—it really was there. Paper and a pen were neatly placed.

Can I even write it?

Since I have paper and a pen, surely they would let me write a will.

“They’ll let me write it.”

I nodded, sitting at the table.

I had reason to believe I could at least leave a will.

Because the treatment I’ve received since being confined here has been surprisingly gentle and humane.

Honestly, let’s be real. I know what I did. I really don’t want to admit it, but I barged into an ongoing court session and insulted His Majesty.

I don’t even remember exactly what I said. Either way, insulting the ruler of this country makes me a serious criminal.

And even though I’m a noble, a serious criminal should be locked alone in an empty room, stripped of all belongings, waiting only for punishment.

But throughout my transfer to this room, the knights were exceedingly polite.

Even after being confined, palace maids subtly signaled to me and started dressing me up with the help of other maids.

They cleaned the dust, sweat, and tears off my face and body, dressed me in beautiful clothes, and even adorned me with quite precious jewelry.

And the dress I’m wearing…

It’s a white low-bust gown with lace so finely woven it covers my shoulders like a delicate armor.

It’s truly beautiful. I thought I knew about expensive dresses, but I had never seen lace as light and beautiful as butterfly wings.

How much more would they have had to spend for this?

“Could this be a shroud?”

They say the last meal before execution is given freely, right? Could this be it? Do they usually treat someone sentenced to execution this well?

I rested the paper on a book as a makeshift writing board and held the pen, lost in thought.

Suddenly, a small laugh came from the doorway.

“That can’t be.”

“…Hah!”

Reflexively, I turned my head—and there he was. His Majesty!

The Emperor was leaning against the doorway, coat draped over his shoulders, arms crossed.

Still as handsome as ever. I thought that with the Emperor’s face, the country’s peace would be assured.

But… since when had he been there? He appeared out of nowhere, as if teleporting. Come to think of it, when we met in the great forest, he appeared in a similar way…

“You cursed me before, and now you don’t even show respect.”

“…When did I curse you? The daughter of the Wildenbistone family greets His Majesty.”

I snapped back indignantly but naturally rose from my chair, bending one leg behind me in a formal bow.

As if I had intended all along to show proper respect, regardless of whether he noticed. Of course, whether he would accept it was another question…

“That was a surprisingly natural bow, given your delayed realization. Very well. Sit back down.”

…It didn’t work.

I hid my awkward expression poorly and sat back down. His Majesty strode toward me and sat in the chair directly across from mine.

“You didn’t touch these, did you? They were things you liked.”

“The Francis collection? Yes… Did I mention them before?”

“Hmm.”

For a moment, he didn’t respond, but took the writing board I was holding with a dissatisfied look.

“‘A will’?”

He must have noticed the two words I had written. Suddenly, a frown appeared on the Emperor’s face.

“Why are you writing a will?”

“I’ve committed a capital offense… I spoke rudely to Your Majesty. I’m risking my life by protesting. I just hope my actions don’t harm my family.”

“…”

His Majesty looked at me quietly. His previously amused eyes turned serious. Then, suddenly, he tore the will off the writing board in pieces.

“…If you’ve committed a capital offense, you should ask for forgiveness. Why write a will?”

“I wanted to ask for forgiveness through my death.”

“…”

His expression darkened slightly.

…Could it be that even in death, I won’t receive forgiveness? I realized the gravity of the situation.

“Your Majesty, can I not even write my will? Should I just be sent straight to the underground prison?”

“…”

The silence only made me more anxious. I clasped my hands in front of me and started pleading.

“Surely my family won’t be harmed too, right? Normally, only I would be expelled from the family. I could be demoted to a commoner while my family survives. After all, only I committed a crime—what did my family do wrong? Then I’d just become a commoner, right?”

His Majesty’s eyebrows twitched. He didn’t respond to my rambling but instead asked me slowly:

“…Where did you learn that? You seem quite interested in our country’s judicial system.”

“No, I just read it in a book. It was an old famous Harlequin novel called How to Become a Radiant Empress. In it, the heroine suffers under a cruel emperor…”

At that moment, the Emperor’s eyes suddenly flashed. He seemed to gather his emotions, exhaled, and asked very slowly:

“…Isn’t the emperor the male lead?”

“Yes. The heroine ends up with the emperor’s half-brother. The emperor is rather harsh—he is cruel to the heroine and the half-brother, ruling with tyranny, then suddenly dies of high blood pressure. The half-brother succeeds to the throne, and she becomes the empress. Oh… I think that was in the stack of books over there…”

I pulled a book from the pile and held it out in front of Emperor Rubellus. It was part of my old romance novel collection that I loved as a child.

Yes, I thought it was a must-read to become an empress, but like most romance novels, it didn’t really help with a relationship with Emperor Rubellus.

Honestly, the part where the emperor dies of illness seemed unlikely to me. In my view, it would have made more sense as a full-blown rebellion, but I suppose for the sake of the imperial subjects, they changed it.

“…Give it here.”

“Do you want to read it?”

“No, just ban it from publication.”

“Huh?”

I didn’t hear clearly. I asked again, but His Majesty didn’t answer, only staring at the book intently, moving only his lips.

It seemed like he was saying something like “You brought it because you liked it,” or “You thought it would lead to being with the Emperor,” but I wasn’t sure.

Then… suddenly, silence fell.