TDSM 23

Chapter – 23

Serdian could have been a great help on the magical side, but since he was working at the Mage Tower, it was extremely difficult to ask him for assistance.

My eldest brother was just as busy, so I wasn’t sure whether I’d even be able to meet him, but fortunately, I received a reply saying he had time tomorrow.

To be honest, the question of whether it was right to tell my eldest brother about what had happened to me kept circling in my mind.

But still, I was no longer just a child.

So I chose to trust that my eldest brother would be able to make a rational judgment after hearing my story.

And this was about dark magic—something heavy and frightening.

Of course, I planned to test the waters slowly at first, and if it seemed like a bad idea, I’d stop talking immediately.

“Didn’t Lenia say she was stepping out for a bit?”

“Yeah. I have plans with my eldest brother.”

“I see. Guess we won’t see your face tomorrow.”

“Why, will you miss me?”

“Yeah…….”

“You see my face every day—what’s there to miss!”

I burst out laughing at his answer, and Ignis smiled as he looked at me.

“Lenia!”

“Brother!”

My eldest brother, whom I hadn’t seen in a long time, came up to me and pulled me into a tight hug as he asked how I’d been.

“Have you been well?”

“Of course. You finally have a day off—you should be resting. I’m sorry I asked you to meet me.”

“Don’t think like that. You’re the one who had a hard time coming all the way here.”

“Still……”

“But it’s nice to see your face again after so long.”

“Thank you, brother. But… what’s that you’ve got hanging behind you?”

I noticed a man quietly watching us while hiding behind my eldest brother.

Hearing my words, my brother turned around, then called him out as the man awkwardly revealed himself halfway.

“Serdian, you’ve been found out. Come out already.”

“Lenia… are you hurt anywhere?”

“No, I’m fine. Brother, weren’t you at the Mage Tower?”

“Huh? Ah—yeah, I was.”

“Then how are you here?”

Serdian drooped his eyes slightly as he began to answer my question.

“Well… I had some business in the capital, so I came, and I was going to stay one night before leaving. Then I happened to hear that my elder brother was meeting you.”

“But if you have work, shouldn’t you go straight back to the Mage Tower? How can you still be here?”

“No! It’s fine. I finished everything before coming, so it doesn’t matter.”

“…….”

Still wearing that expression that tugged at people’s hearts, he carefully took my hand in both of his.

“You’re meeting my brother one-on-one—how could I just leave? If I went, who knows when I’d see you again!”

“Well, since it turned out this way, there’s nothing we can do.”

“…….”

“Let’s talk a lot, the three of us. It’s been a while.”

At my words, Serdian beamed and pulled me into his arms.

My eldest brother quickly separated him from me, then wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

“Let’s go inside. I prepared what you said you wanted to eat in your letter.”

“Wow, really?”

“…….”

I quickly reached for Serdian, who had moved to sit on my other side, and grabbed his hand—trying to stop him from prying my brother’s arm off me.

Watching us, my eldest brother opened the door to the place where we usually drank tea and spoke.

“Since you said to prepare just a little, Lenia, I really only prepared a little—so don’t worry.”

“Ah… I’m not worried, brother. I just said it in case.”

Normally, my eldest brother was simply kind and dependable, but for some reason, when it came to things I asked for, he had no sense of limits.

I hadn’t wanted to bring it up this time either… but I figured I needed at least some dessert made by our chef to calm my nerves.

Still, I’d emphasized really, really, really to prepare just a little in the letter.

So by my brother’s standards, there should have been just enough for the three of us to eat—

“Brother.”

“Hm? What is it, Lenia?”

“I told you to prepare just a little.”

It seemed I had underestimated my eldest brother far too much.

Beyond the opened door, desserts were piled on the table like a mountain, glittering brightly.

…Was it because I only said “really” three times this time?

I’d added one more than last time, since even twice hadn’t worked before.

“I prepared just a little, like you said.”

“…I see. Yeah. Thank you, brother.”

Faced with my brother’s completely innocent expression, as if he truly didn’t understand what the problem was, I simply sat down and put one of the mountain of desserts into my mouth.

Serdian, sitting beside me, watched me eat for a long while before suddenly pulling something out of his inner pocket.

“What’s that?”

“I made it again for you, Lenia.”

“Wow, it’s a marble. It’s pretty.”

As he placed the marble into my hand, he said,

“If there’s someone you don’t like, throw this at them and hit them.”

“What happens if it hits?”

“Who knows? Oh—and just in case, don’t touch it too much.”

Watching Serdian smile playfully, a small sense of doubt rose in the back of my mind.

But thanks to the dessert he fed me, that doubt quickly vanished like smoke.

As I savored the desserts Serdian offered, I began to properly share updates with my brothers.

They had many questions about my daily life, and because of that, our conversation went on for quite a long time.

Just as the discussion was winding down, my eldest brother finally asked me a heavy question.

“So, Lenia—what did you want to ask?”

“Huh?”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to meet because you had something to ask?”

“Ah… well.”

Serdian, who had been gently brushing crumbs from my lips, also looked at me with eyes full of curiosity.

You practiced saying this calmly as much as you could yesterday. So it’ll be fine.

In fact, I’d spent several nights practicing hard so I could speak as maturely and calmly as possible.

Right. After all that practice, I can do this.

Taking a small deep breath, I steadied my rising nerves and slowly opened my mouth.

“Well… actually, I wanted to ask a little about dark magic……”

“Lenia.”

“Did something happen?”

“Huh? Ah, well……”

I’m not just a child anymore, so they’ll listen to me rationally.

Let’s trust that.

Seeing my brothers ask what had happened, I briefly felt confident that it would be okay to tell them everything.

That confidence lasted only until I heard what they said next.

“Lenia, if anything happened to you, don’t worry. We’ll take care of everything.”

“We won’t let anything harm you. So tell us, okay?”

“…It’s nothing.”

“Huh?”

“What did you say, Lenia?”

“It’s really nothing. I was just reading a book and suddenly got curious…… that’s all.”

I joked lightly and smiled, and they let out relieved sighs before sitting back down.

“Lenia, you scared us. We thought something really happened to you.”

“If something does happen, you have to tell us right away. Got it?”

“Yeah. I understand. Ah, I should get going now.”

“Already?”

They stood up again to follow me, wearing disappointed expressions.

“Yeah. It would’ve been nice to have dinner together, but something suddenly came up.”

“…That’s too bad. Nothing we can do.”

“Little brother, you should hurry back to the Mage Tower too.”

“I will. If you’re not here, there’s no reason for me to stay.”

After that, I went outside with my brothers and got into the carriage that was waiting.

They kept waving until the carriage moved so far away that they were no longer visible, even as tiny dots.

Only then did I rub my face with dry hands and let out a deep sigh.

“Even if I’ve grown a bit… nothing really changed.”

The way they tried to cast everything aside and focus only on my well-being was exactly what I didn’t want—and what I feared most.

Whenever something dangerous happened to me, they never thought at all about the danger that might come to them.

That was why, if I’d told them everything in that moment, it was obvious they would once again think only of my safety and nothing else.

And what if something happened to them?

If they were harmed because of something I dragged them into, I’d never be able to overcome the guilt that followed.

That was why I hadn’t told my friends a single word about what had happened to me, either.

My brothers were adults who could at least protect themselves, so I’d thought about asking them for help just a little…

But if I were truly scared of the dark magic that approached me and thought only of my own safety, I would have told them everything and let them act that way.

However, the reason I wanted to recover my memories and investigate what happened to me was also because I thought it might provide a clue about dark magic—to prepare for the war that would come someday.

Since my memories of the original story were fragmented, it was possible that someone precious to me could be hurt in that future war.

I had even had an ominous dream related to it.

If I couldn’t recover my memories and didn’t know what would happen to them, I’d rather cut off the possibility of such events entirely—if I could.

In other words, every reason behind my actions was because I feared my precious people might get hurt.

That was why I didn’t want relationships where my loved ones sacrificed themselves for me.

I wanted us to solve this together, on equal footing, helping each other.

“Still… I did it because this was all I could do for now.”

Anyway, what I learned deeply from this was that I needed to find people who wouldn’t sacrifice themselves for me—people who stood on equal ground.

Letting out another deep sigh, I leaned my head against the small carriage window.