TCHB 26

Chapter 26

About five years had passed since Shuri disappeared.

Time—something I once believed would never move forward—flowed on like water, and I grew up along with it. Along with that growth came thirst.

At first, after she vanished, I tried to find her. No—more precisely, I traced her whereabouts and followed the remnants of her trail. But midway through, I stopped.

I became afraid that if she learned I was searching for her, she might end up hating me. It was ridiculous—after spending so long avoiding her, I was now doing something like this.

I didn’t even understand why I cared about being disliked by someone other than Lotte. What was it about “liking someone” that could make a person so miserable and unstable?

“Brother? May I come in?”

Just as I was lost in thought, a knock sounded at the door, followed by Lotte’s voice. I glanced at the time—it was when we’d planned to have tea together.

“Come in.”

A year after Shuri left, Lotte had begun addressing me formally again. Both of us had grown, so in a way, it was only natural.

“Were you covering Father’s work again? That’s workaholism, Brother.”

After agonizing between my selfish desire not to be hated and my longing to see her again, I’d temporarily stopped searching for Shuri.

Still, I couldn’t stop worrying about her. So I threw myself into other things—namely, Father’s work.

I was the heir, after all. Learning things ahead of time wasn’t a bad idea. From an efficiency standpoint, it was actually reasonable.

“Thanks for worrying, but I’m fine, Lotte.”

I reached out, tidied her slightly disheveled hair, and lightly tapped her head. She frowned in displeasure.

“Tch. Are you still treating me like a child? I’ve grown up too, you know?”

“Yes. You’ve grown a lot compared to before.”

Even as I said that, Shuri crossed my mind.

How much had she grown? She used to be taller than Lotte. If we met again, would she still be taller? Would she be happy to see me—or would she run away?

I shook my head.

If I kept thinking like this, my longing would only grow, and bitterness would fill my mouth. This was enough. I had to stop here.

“Brother… you still haven’t found anything about Shuri, right…?”

“No. Don’t worry too much. She’ll be fine.”

I forced a smile, and Lotte smiled back. I felt guilty for always showing her such an unpleasant side of myself.

Thinking about it, the reason Lotte and I started having tea together was because I hadn’t been in good shape mentally.

“Right now, I’m more worried about you than Shuri. Your face was already thin, but now it’s half-gone.”

I welcomed her concerned nagging. As always, mundane conversations passed, and even without Shuri, time moved on quickly.

“I should go now. The Viscountess Ostalre is coming.”

After learning etiquette for several years, she’d become quite adept at imitating an elegant lady—more refined than a noble young lady, yet less so than a seasoned matron of high society.

Of course, to me, she was still nothing but a little girl.

“Alright. Call a maid on your way out.”

“Yes, Brother. Ah—and don’t sit back down at your desk again just because I’m leaving. And don’t worry about Shuri. Our Shuri is strong and amazing! She’ll definitely come back soon and greet us with a smile! She must’ve had a reason for leaving so suddenly!”

Beaming, Lotte reminded me once more to rest instead of working nonstop before leaving.

All I could do was smile awkwardly. Once she was gone, I’d obviously return to work—I couldn’t possibly honor her request.

“Young Master, shall I clear this away?”

I didn’t answer and sat back down at the desk. Less than a minute had passed since Lotte told me not to, but immersing myself in something—anything—was better for my sanity.

“What? You’re working again?”

Lukain’s voice came from the doorway. Just as I was about to start working, an annoyance appeared.

“What do you want.”

“Wow. That’s cold. Is that how you talk to a friend?”

Pointless chatter. I ignored him and lowered my gaze to the documents. This one would need Father’s seal.

“Hey. Why.”

He suddenly covered the papers I was reading with his hand, forcing me to look up.

This guy should be busier than me due to the succession struggle—how did he have time to wander around like this? I frowned.

“Get a grip. Your sister is extremely worried about you. She asked me to stop you. Said that as soon as she leaves, you go right back to paperwork.”

“Get to the point.”

I asked again, irritation creeping in.

“My father doesn’t like your family.”

“That senile emperor never has.”

I replied indifferently.

The first time I attended a banquet was when I was twelve, in winter. My parents dragged me out of my self-imposed isolation. There, the emperor insulted me to my face.

“Ah, so you’re the duke’s son. You look rather insignificant—like some pampered pretty boy.”

My father stepped in front of me.

And what did the emperor say again?

“A joke. Too scary to try twice. Why isn’t anyone laughing? Was my joke not funny?”

Silence fell, then one noble started laughing, followed by others who forced laughter despite the chilling atmosphere, praising the emperor. The look in his eyes as he watched my father—pure delight.

My brief impression back then was simple: His brain hasn’t fully grown.

“Even so, he’s biologically my father. Is that how you talk about him?”

“Yep.”

I answered lazily, and Lukain snickered.

What a weirdo.

“Well, same for me. Biologically my father too, but I don’t like him much. Though he adores me.”

“So what’s your point?”

“Looks like he’s plotting something. I came to warn you.”

He shrugged, completely carefree despite issuing a warning.

“You don’t know what it is?”

“Nope. Just overheard something in passing. And you—shouldn’t it be about time you moved on? She left to travel with another boy, didn’t she? Were you really that serious?”

“Shut up.”

My teeth ground together. When I glared at him with killing intent, he grinned obnoxiously and waved his hands.

“Oh my, darling. That’s so pathetic!”

I wanted to punch his face.

In front of others, he acted gentle, kind, impeccably well-mannered—but alone with me, he pulled this vulgar nonsense.

Disgusting.

“Get out.”

“Wow. Ever since taking lessons from your mother, you’ve been pretty good at acting gentle—but there’s the old you again. At this rate, will you even be able to treat Shuri kindly when you meet her again? Same with Lotte—you’re not being kind, you’re just pretending.”

“Don’t cross the line.”

“There’s a difference between the real thing and a fake. People notice. Genuine kindness and pretending to be kind are the same. Anyone who knows you well would spot it immediately.”

She might’ve already noticed.

I acknowledged that calmly inside. I knew. I knew genuine kindness and pretense were different—and that if the recipient realized it, they could be hurt.

But I didn’t have the emotional leeway to be truly kind to my precious sister Lotte. This was the best I could do.

“Be careful. If you meet Shuri and treat her kindly ‘for show,’ she’ll notice immediately. She was a girl who followed you around because she liked you, remember?”

Whether that was still true, I didn’t know.

As if he’d said everything he needed to, Lukain raised a hand in a casual farewell and left.

Silence filled the room once more. As always, something felt hollow.

Lonely. Tired. Longing. Missing her.

The complaints rose to my throat—but as always, I swallowed them back down.

“…Let’s work.”

I gripped the pen firmly again. I needed to write, but nothing came out.

Maybe because it had been so long since I’d faced it—I couldn’t contain myself. Unsorted emotions ran rampant.

Ever since my feelings for Shuri had been labeled “love,” I’d been unable to move forward. I was still stuck on that day.

Like a clock that had stopped.

And I was still waiting for someone to turn its hands again.

* * *

“Father, what did you just say?”

The next day, after lunch, Father summoned me to his office. I frowned as I questioned him about the emperor.

“Relax your face. You’re frightening, my son.”

“I apologize. So you’re saying His Majesty suddenly granted you leave and ordered you to visit a small island in the south?”

I tried to soften my expression, but it only stiffened further.

It had only been a day since Lukain warned me—and now this order? Just as he said, the emperor clearly had ulterior motives.

“He must be scheming something, Father.”

“But it’s an imperial command. If we refuse—”

“He’ll accuse us of treason. That deranged old man wants to control our family completely.”

The current emperor was greedy and vile.

The Richard family had been blessed with wealth since our ancestors’ time. Mountains turned into diamond mines. Every investment flourished.

Because of that, an agreement had been made generations ago—the duke would support the imperial family, and in return, neither side would turn on the other.

Meaningless now.

The reason the emperor was desperate to swallow our family was simple: most of the southern region belonged to us, and it generated enormous wealth.

The south was ideal for resorts, rich in minerals, had fertile land, and access to the sea—perfect for profit.

Even so, the Richard family never sought independence for one reason:

To honor the old agreement and keep faith.

That alone showed how incompatible Father and the current emperor were.

“Have you told Mother?”

“Not yet. She’d worry immediately, and I hate that. That’s why I’m telling only you. Don’t tell Lotte or Clarier.”

“Yes, Father.”

We discussed various scenarios deep into the night. Even so, no clear conclusion was reached—and the day to leave for the southern island arrived.

“I’m so happy you finally came out of your room, Brother! You’re always buried in documents—I was going to explode!”

Lotte smiled brightly at me. I tried to return her sincere smile—but stopped.

Don’t pretend to be kind, you hypocrite.

The words stabbed at me.

“Brother?”

“…Ah. Yes. Let’s go out together again sometime.”

I quickly smoothed my frozen expression.

As I boarded the ship, a glimpse of white silver hair beneath a hood made my heart drop.

Could it be… Shuri?

Without realizing it, I reached out—but Lotte grabbed me.

“There are too many people. We’ll lose each other. Hold my hand tight, Brother!”

Led by Lotte toward Mother and Father, my gaze remained fixed on where I’d seen the silver hair.

Was it really Shuri?

My heart fluttered with excitement—then cooled just as quickly.

I shouldn’t expect anything. If I did and it wasn’t her, the disappointment would be unbearable.

This had happened more than once before. Each time, I’d been crushed.

I didn’t want to be disappointed again.

“Father, I’ll go get some air.”

I stood up from what might’ve been breakfast or lunch and walked away.

One step, then another. With no destination in mind, I wandered until I realized I was lost. Just as I turned back—

I heard a voice.

Soft. Familiar.

“Go to Venters.”

I didn’t like the name—but I knew it. The voice was slightly different, but unmistakable.

It was Shuri.

I moved carefully. Thankfully, she hadn’t noticed me.

A few seconds later, she suddenly collapsed, nausea twisting my stomach in sympathy—then easing quickly. I approached her cautiously.

When her hood slipped off, the white silver hair that had barely been visible burst into full brilliance, shimmering in the sunlight.

Driven by a single desire—to see her more clearly—I stepped closer.

That’s when she noticed my presence. Her gaze lifted from the ground, violet eyes swirling with emotion.

The face I’d missed so desperately.

When she recognized me, her eyes widened—adorable.

I found you.

After a long, relentless chase—

I was the one caught by you.