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Chapter : 03
“This old man should be on his way now.”
“Where are you going?”
“His Highness has awakened, has he not? I must report this happy news to His Majesty. We should also summon a physician. He must be hungry, so I’ll have the kitchen prepare some thin soup.”
“Ah…”
The moment I realized Gote was leaving, my heart dropped heavily.
I wanted to cling to the old man’s sleeve and beg him not to go.
It felt as if some unseen, rough hand had seized my heart and was shaking it violently.
‘Is this because of the princess’s memories?’
There was no real connection or bond between Gote and me.
So this reaction was clearly abnormal.
I lifted a hand to the corner of my eye.
‘I’m about to cry, even.’
Perhaps Aeyrencia’s reactions in certain situations had remained in the body like a conditioned reflex.
‘Even in the memories, she would burst into tears whenever Gote tried to leave.’
Maybe it was both.
Even now, my hand was itching to shoot out, but I held myself back.
‘I shouldn’t trouble him.’
Though only fragments came to mind, in every memory so far, Gote had suffered endlessly because of the princess who refused to be separated from him even for a moment.
“Wrinkly! You—don’t go! You have to sleep here, eat here, and poop here too!”
“But, Your Highness… there are mountains of urgent matters awaiting approval.”
“No! You can’t go! Wrinkly is mine! Why won’t you listen to your owner?! If you move even one step, I’ll jump out the window! I really will jump! I swear I will—waaaah! Huuuuh!”
Because she threw tantrums and cried like this every time, Gote could only handle his duties in the early hours after the princess had finally fallen asleep.
The biggest problem was that whenever Gote left, she would throw palace furnishings, smashing them, and injure the servants.
“Nella was struck by a paperweight the princess threw—she’s bleeding!”
“Today it was Isabel. Her arm was cut by a letter knife.”
“Hanson has submitted his resignation. Forgive my boldness, but he says he can no longer endure the princess’s temperament.”
“…Bring the injured children to me.”
Fearing that her already poor reputation would worsen, Gote spent his days compensating injured attendants and replenishing staff who slipped away like sand through his fingers, wearing down his aging body until even his cartilage felt ground away.
“…Okay. I understand. Please come back quickly.”
When I didn’t throw a tantrum and withdrew quietly, Gote blinked in surprise before smiling gently.
“I’ll leave Isabel here in my place. Surely Your Highness would prefer the company of a young woman closer to your age than an old man like me.”
At that, I peeked my head up from where I’d been crouched on the bed.
The maid with reddish-brown hair, who looked barely in her early twenties at most, curved her eyes kindly when our gazes met.
‘…She doesn’t really look my age.’
She didn’t seem particularly close in age to either Aeyrencia or me.
“Mm…”
Rather than protesting, I nodded awkwardly.
To someone that old, ten or twenty years probably all looked the same.
“I’ll return shortly, so you must stay quiet, all right?”
Still uneasy, Gote repeated his instructions several times before leaving the room.
“……”
“……”
Left alone with the maid, I fidgeted with my fingers. It felt like a cartoonish draft of cold air was blowing between us.
‘I should… say something…’
No—why am I like this?
I couldn’t even lift my head, fidgeting nervously, until I suddenly snapped back to my senses.
Silence that I normally wouldn’t have cared about now felt so awkward my heart was pounding uncontrollably.
The more Aeyrencia’s memories surfaced, the more it felt like they were slowly eating away at me.
If my mind regressed too, there would be no saving me.
The worst case scenario would be losing all my memories of my previous life and becoming “Villain Aeyrencia.”
‘Get it together.’
I bit my lip.
Losing my memories was frightening, but imagining myself throwing tantrums on the floor at this age was downright horrifying.
“…Your legs must hurt. Why don’t you sit down for now?”
I finally gathered enough courage to speak. I pointed to the single sofa Gote had dragged next to the bed for his own use.
Isabel, who had been standing blankly by the door staring at me, approached and sat down without a word.
And once again, silence fell.
“……”
“……”
‘Did I… do something wrong?’
No—had the princess done many things wrong?
Perhaps Isabel was also a victim of Aeyrencia’s past misdeeds.
‘I won’t hurt you.’
Praying my smile looked as harmless and innocent as possible, I awkwardly tugged my lips upward.
That was when my stomach betrayed me without mercy.
Grrrkk.
Now that I thought about it, I hadn’t eaten anything. So much had happened that it had completely slipped my mind.
Feeling my cheeks heat up, I stole a sideways glance at Isabel—only to meet her eyes directly.
“……”
But Isabel only continued to stare at me in silence.
No—rather than just “staring,” it felt more like a researcher observing a butterfly specimen.
“Um… miss—”
I hesitated before carefully opening my mouth.
“Have you lost your mind or something?”
Huh?
Her voice, cutting me off, was far colder than I’d expected. Isabel stared directly at my clearly flustered face, leaned back against the chair, and crossed her arms sharply.
“…Miss?”
“Why would I be your ‘miss,’ Your Highness? That’s disgusting.”
“Then… what should I call you…”
“Don’t call me at all. Did you lose your memory or something? Why are you suddenly clinging to people like this?”
The gentle smile from earlier was completely gone from her prim face.
“Wait—”
“I said don’t bother me.”
With an irritated sigh, Isabel tapped my forehead with her index finger.
The world tilted slowly.
At the same time, a splitting headache struck, and scattered whispering voices flooded my mind.
“We have to take care of that thing?”
“They say they don’t even know who her mother is. Who knows if filthy blood’s mixed in?”
“Ah—she pooped again! Disgusting! She barely eats, so why does she go so much? Did you feed her lunch?”
“I thought she didn’t eat dinner yesterday… What if she dies?”
“That’s why we feed her once a day.”
“Why does she cry so much? It’s so noisy I can’t sleep!”
“Hey… should we feed her that? The stuff you eat before bed. Just a little should be fine, right?”
‘Huh?’
…What?
‘What are these memories?’
My body toppled backward like a rag doll, my mouth hanging open.
“You said you were still sick, didn’t you?”
“Mmm…”
“Then just sleep. Don’t be a nuisance.”
Staring wide-eyed at the ceiling, I slowly blinked.
‘…These are Aeyrencia’s memories?’
In the flood of memories, I became a newborn crying weakly, then a toddler barely managing to walk while holding onto a table, then stuffing dry bread into my mouth in a hurry and spilling milk—only to be struck by a governess’s rod.
And now…
I gasped sharply, unable even to wipe my wet cheeks.
My heart hammered violently in my chest.
“Is this really okay? What if His Majesty suddenly visits?”
“It’s fine. Jeff said it seems he’s completely forgotten this child. And His Majesty made preparations in advance. Nothing will happen, so don’t worry.”
In the memories, Aeyrencia lay sprawled on the floor, gnawing on the hem of a worn skirt to soothe her hunger.
Even though I hadn’t lived it myself, my lips trembled uncontrollably.
Heat rushed to my eyes. The world spun dizzyingly.
‘What kind of father lets his child rot like this?’
Come to think of it, in Sword of the Azure Sky, Aeyrencia relied on Gote alone.
The emperor—her own father—turned his back on her, and the crown prince despised her for constantly causing trouble. No wonder they’d even sent assassins to preserve the imperial family’s dignity.
‘It’s not that she refused to open her heart. Gote was the only person she could trust.’
Still—she was a princess.
In a rigid class-based society where even slaves existed, how could someone at the very top be this isolated?
‘Surely people would line up just to make contact with royalty, even if it were a rotten rope.’
Then I remembered that the Mirror Palace stood isolated at the edge of the imperial grounds.
That realization struck like lightning.
‘No—this happened precisely because it’s a class-based society.’
People feared drawing close to a hated princess, afraid they’d be cut down by a tyrant’s blade.
Afraid of falling out of favor with a crown prince who regarded her as less than an insect.
Compared to the risk, the reward for befriending the princess was pitiful—almost nonexistent.
‘She’s the same. The people of the Mirror Palace too.’
Now I understood why the princess’s body had clung to Gote so desperately.
I looked at Isabel, reclining comfortably on the sofa with her eyes closed.
My stomach churned as if it were filled with pudding.
* * *
Despite my stomach burning with hunger and my vision swimming, sleep claimed me quickly.
“Waaah! Waaah!”
In my dream, I was a baby.
A helpless infant who could do nothing but cry.
Standing before me was a man.
A shockingly handsome blond man, so beautiful it sent shivers through my entire body. His face was identical to the princess I’d seen reflected in the mirror.
“…Tsk.”
After looking me over with displeasure, the man clicked his tongue and picked up a sack with one hand.
“Leave it in the Mirror Palace.”
After saying that, the man casually tossed the baby toward the knight behind him.
