MFHSL 12

Chapter 12

“You’re making me angry because you’re such a pathetic liar!”

“…You’re calling me a liar?”

After yelling at him, I turned on my heel to walk away again, but Axyon grabbed my wrist once more.

“Let go!”

I thrashed, practically screaming, but this time he didn’t back down so easily.

Eventually, I realized I couldn’t shake him off with my strength alone. That didn’t mean my anger had subsided.

“Fine! You—stupid—how dare you…”

My words came out broken, tangled by my frustration. Incoherent phrases tumbled out of my mouth. The fact that I couldn’t even speak properly only made me angrier. I ended up screaming again.

“I said let go!!”

“Jen, I’ll let go once you calm down. If you go any farther, there’s only a cliff beyond. Please…”

“Don’t meddle!”

“Jen, please.”

“……”

He was nearly begging. I stopped and looked up at him. His face was calm—so calm it was hard to believe he’d been pleading with me just moments ago.

His hair was only slightly ruffled, completely different from me, who looked disheveled from all the yelling.

All I wanted was to apologize to you. To the you who was upset and jealous. But instead of being jealous or hurt, Axyon hadn’t expected anything at all. And his lack of emotion only made the anger and guilt in me swell up.

“What do you want me to do? Tell me, and I’ll…”

Smack.

Axyon’s head jerked to the side with the sound. I had already slapped him before my rationality returned.

Startled by what I’d done, I gasped.

His cheek was bright red from the force of the slap.

And it wasn’t just Axyon who hadn’t changed.

“Even after killing him once, I still haven’t come to my senses.”

A surge of self-loathing washed over me.

“…Do you feel better now?”

His voice was calm, steady, without the slightest trace of resentment. Did I feel better?

It was strange. I’d just regretted raising my hand against him, and yet again, I lost control. My eyes welled up with tears. I swung my left hand again, eyes squeezed shut, but Axyon caught it—then gently lowered it, enclosing my hand in his.

I had slapped him, but somehow my palm was redder than his cheek. It throbbed, but I forced myself not to show it.

No, it wasn’t something I could show.

“No. I don’t feel better.”

“Then I won’t offer my cheek again.”

So he could have dodged it… and chose not to.

I was furious. But what made me angriest was that he didn’t even seem to understand why I was mad.

Even I hadn’t known why at first.

Why was I so upset? Because he didn’t react with jealousy the way I’d imagined? Because he didn’t care that Maxim Dolan and I were doing something together?

Sure, that was part of it.

But that alone couldn’t explain the depth of the sadness I felt. The more I examined my feelings, the clearer the real reason became.

This wasn’t about whether he trusted me or not. Even if he didn’t believe in me, I could’ve proved my sincerity with actions.

Slowly, I relaxed my body.

Seeing me calm down, Axyon gently stroked the inside of my wrist.

Still, he didn’t speak easily—he seemed worried that whatever he said might set me off again.

Even now, he was thinking about me.

I’d always wondered—how could he go so willingly to the execution block while claiming to love me? Where did he get the courage to leave me behind?

Now, I was starting to understand.

He didn’t care about himself at all. Back then, I hadn’t either, so I never noticed.

There wasn’t even a shred of self-love in him.

He didn’t care how I treated him.

And the one who had made him that way… was probably me.

“Shion, I’m sorry.”

“…!”

He was clearly shaken, not expecting an apology from me.

“There’s no need to apolo—”

“Don’t make me mad again.”

“….”

I growled at him, and he shut his mouth obediently. Looking at him, I felt a whirl of guilt, anger, and pity.

“You’re a liar.”

“….”

“I really hate liars.”

A very simple syllogism. Axyon is a liar. I hate liars. Therefore, I hate Axyon.

He opened his mouth to respond, then closed it again.

“Tell me. Do you want me to hate you?”

It was childish, but effective. His eyebrows lowered, and he shook his head. He was so much bigger than me, but right now he looked like a lost puppy.

I took his hand and laced our fingers together. As the warmth spread through our joined hands, Axyon’s green eyes locked on mine, intense and unwavering.

“I don’t.”

“Then don’t lie.”

“…Can I really do that?”

I nodded. Even then, he looked confused.

Then, as if steeling himself, he swallowed hard—his Adam’s apple bobbing.

I waited patiently for him to speak.

“I hate it when other men look at you. Sometimes I even get jealous of your nanny.”

“….”

“Just thinking about Maxim Dolan touching even a strand of your hair makes my head spin.”

Once the dam broke, Axyon couldn’t stop. His emotions poured out, raw and unfiltered. Especially when he said Maxim’s name, he nearly spat it out like it was poison.

“I just want to wring that bastard’s neck—”

When our eyes met, he trailed off. Like a criminal caught in the act, he couldn’t raise his head. It was as if he feared I’d be scared of him.

Honestly, I would’ve been lying if I said I wasn’t surprised. I’d never seen him this honest before. But it would’ve been stranger not to be surprised.

I stepped closer, hoping to reassure him. His tension was palpable.

“I absolutely don’t want to lose you.”

He spoke in a broken voice, as if barely holding back tears. I said nothing, just approached.

His darkened green eyes reflected my image. He shut his eyes tightly, as if trying to suppress his emotions.

“You did well, Shion.”

He let out a long breath. I reached out and pulled him toward me. Technically, I was the one hugging him—but with his size, it looked like I was the one being held.

I stroked the back of his head.

“…Aren’t you afraid of me?”

As if. I’m probably scarier than you.

I shook my head against his shoulder. Feeling that, he wrapped his thick arms around my waist, leaving no space between us.

“Don’t lie to me again. And if you hate something, say so.”

“…Okay.”

So obedient. Every time I petted the back of his head, he nuzzled his nose into my shoulder.

It tickled, but I couldn’t push him away. He might’ve been big, but he was still just a child at heart.

He hugged me like he’d never let go.

The one thing I missed was the look in his eyes.

If I had seen his sinister gaze at that moment, things might have turned out very differently. But I didn’t.

I only thought—how pitiful Axyon looked.

* * *

After all the commotion, we finally arrived at the fitting room.

“The floor’s slippery.”

As I stepped on the floor—still wet for some reason—Axyon wrapped an arm around my waist and helped me down.

…Was that really necessary?

Since the incident earlier, Axyon had been acting… different. Sure, he’d always been kind, but now—

There was a subtle shift. Something I couldn’t quite explain.

Am I imagining it?

I shook off the thought and lifted my head—only to lock eyes with Douglas Matteo, the vice-captain of the Dierik knights. His face scrunched up immediately, and he quickly looked away.

I didn’t even ask to be held!

Even though it wasn’t my fault, I had to swallow a sigh. If I let one slip now, Axyon would sense it. Then Douglas would glare at me even more. Forcing a cheerful smile, I slipped my arm through Axyon’s.

“Shall we go in?”

“Yes.”

Through the translucent curtains of the massive fitting room, I could see the silhouettes of knights standing in neat rows.

The fitting room was enormous—so large it barely qualified as one.

This was the only place inside the palace where a royal-certified tailor worked—personally approved by the Emperor.

Nobles could use it too, but very few actually had the privilege.

Still, this feels like a waste of space.

As I walked, lost in that idle thought, Azelia rushed over to greet us.

“Lord Regent!”

She grabbed my wrist warmly.

She had been the last tailor personally certified by the former emperor—my brother, Lucain.

Since Lexin was still a child and I was only the regent, I had no authority to certify anyone, so she had retained her position for quite some time.

Not that it matters—her skill speaks for itself.

Honestly, I thought her being recognized by the Emperor had ruined her chances of making a fortune.

No matter how beautiful a gown, only a handful could wear it.

It was a shame.

“The Grand Duke is with you as well. I’m Azelia.”

Axyon nodded wordlessly, his face as blank as ever with strangers.

“What I asked about?

“Of course—it’s all ready. Please, this way.”