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Chapter 23
“Why are you here…? I was going to sleep alone…”
Calisto muttered as he awkwardly hid the book behind his back and glanced at me. I pulled him toward me and sat him down on my lap.
The child hesitated for a moment, but soon let out a long sigh and rested his cheek against my chest. It was almost funny how he sighed like a grown-up after crying like a little kid—but the warmth of tears still clinging to his breath made my heart ache.
I soothed him gently, rocking him in my arms, wiping his wet cheeks with my thumb. His soft cheeks had grown plumper since I first met him, like a round rice cake. As I patted him silently, his sobbing gradually subsided.
“Cali, why were you crying? Did the servants treat you badly?”
I knew the servants’ attitudes had changed since I started raising Calisto myself. Even the stubborn butler Cliff had begun treating him with proper respect. At this point, Calisto was being treated as the second child of the count’s household. So if someone had still made him cry, I intended to deal with them properly this time.
But Calisto shook his head. His black hair swayed softly against his forehead. I brushed his bangs back and pressed a kiss to his warm forehead as I asked again.
“Then why were you crying?”
“…It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”
“What do you mean, don’t worry? How can I not?”
“I can handle it myself…”
It seemed Calisto didn’t like me interfering. His attempt to push me away made me feel a little hurt and disappointed, but this wasn’t the time to worry about my feelings. I tightened my arms around him and tried to reassure him.
“Of course. You can handle things on your own. But… can you at least tell me what happened? I’m curious.”
“…I don’t want to say.”
“There’s nothing you can’t tell me, right?”
As I gently coaxed him, Calisto lowered his eyes in silence. His long, separated eyelashes were wet with tears that dripped down one by one. His cheeks, flushed from crying, were warm to the touch. It was pitiful.
A little time passed before he finally spoke in a choked voice.
“…I can’t… read.”
“Hm? What do you mean?”
I asked absentmindedly, but Calisto immediately closed his mouth again.
Looking down at him, I suddenly remembered how I had seen him earlier—crying alone while staring at a book. A thought struck me.
“Don’t tell me…”
Startled, I looked down. The top of his head was bowed so low I could only see his round crown. His shoulders trembled slightly as he sobbed.
I cupped his cheek and stroked it carefully.
“Calisto… can you not read letters?”
“Waaahh…”
At that, Calisto—who had just barely calmed down—burst into tears again.
I panicked and hurriedly tried to soothe him. I had no idea why I would say something like that. I wanted to bite my tongue.
“Don’t cry, sweetheart. That was my fault. I’m sorry, okay?”
“Sniff… I… can’t read… sob…”
His eyes quickly turned red and swollen. He clung tightly to my clothes, still crying. The sight of such a small child crying because he couldn’t read made my chest ache.
“It’s okay. It’s not a big deal, so why are you crying? Stop crying, okay?”
“Then… sob… you won’t like me anymore?”
“What? Why wouldn’t I like you?”
“Because I don’t know anything…”
“What does that have to do with anything? Whether you know everything or nothing, I like you just the same, Calisto.”
“That’s a lie…”
“It’s not a lie. And if you don’t know, you can learn. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking properly.”
“Sniff… really?”
“Of course. There’s nothing to worry about.”
I kept patting him, repeating it over and over.
In the original story, Calisto was a genius who could do anything effortlessly. Because of that, I had never worried about him.
But the original story only depicted a fragment of his life.
This world was no longer just a novel. Calisto, Lawrence, and Count Winyeates were no longer fictional characters—they were living, breathing people. Each of them had their own stories and circumstances that the author had never described.
Even the seemingly effortless genius Calisto must have worked hard in ways the original story never showed. Learning to read, gaining knowledge—all of that must have been part of it. During the shared classes with Ibris and the others, he had probably been studying on his own in places unseen by readers. The novel simply never described it.
Thinking about it, Calisto had been raised under constant threat from the empress and the Harrington Duke from the moment he was born. After his nanny was killed, he had wandered the slums alone for two years at the age of five.
There had been no environment for him to learn how to read. It was my fault for not realizing that.
Calisto still couldn’t calm down. I didn’t know how to comfort him and fidgeted anxiously.
“Cali… please don’t cry. Why are you still crying?”
“I can’t read… so do I have to learn separately?”
“Yeah. You can learn…”
“Then… will I be kicked out of class?”
“Huh?”
The sudden change in topic confused me.
The classes had originally been started because of Calisto—to help him socialize with Lawrence, the future love interest, and the other children.
So if he couldn’t read, it would be difficult for him to keep up, but removing him from class was not an option. I couldn’t possibly handle four children under ten all by myself for something I didn’t even particularly need.
But forcing him into something he disliked wasn’t an option either. As I hesitated, Calisto tugged at my sleeve. Tears rolled down his soft cheeks.
“Don’t… kick me out. I’ll learn properly. I want to stay in class with big brother…”
“…Calisto.”
So he still wanted to attend the shared classes.
He must really hate being left alone. Calisto was still a child who disliked sleeping alone at night, after all.
I wiped his cheeks again, and he rubbed his face against my chest. My heart ached too much to think about anything else.
“I didn’t even realize you were thinking like this…”
I felt guilty for only thinking about my business and my own survival. I leaned down and pressed my lips to his wet cheek. Calisto was now hiccuping.
His shoulders jumped slightly with every hiccup. I held him tightly and whispered in his ear.
“So you want to stay in class? Really?”
“…Mm.”
“Then should I teach you to read separately? Without telling anyone else?”
He probably wouldn’t want the other children to know. Since he slept with me every night anyway, I could teach him for an hour or two before bed. Given how intelligent and talented he was, as the original story described, he would catch up quickly.
I added gently,
“So don’t cry… okay?”
At that, Calisto suddenly lifted his head.
“…You’ll teach me yourself?”
His tears had stopped completely. So suddenly?
I was a little taken aback, but I was relieved he had calmed down. I wiped his damp eyes with my fingers.
“Yeah. I’ll teach you myself without telling anyone. Let’s study together starting tomorrow.”
“…Every day?”
“Yeah, every day.”
I didn’t expect him to be so eager to study just because he was upset. Calisto looked up at me with tear-filled amber eyes, then blushed and nodded. He grabbed my hand tightly.
“Don’t let that fox guy join. It’s just me and you.”
“Huh? Of course. Why would Lawrence be there?”
It seemed he especially didn’t want Lawrence to know he couldn’t read. He must have been trying so hard on his own that he ended up crying. My heart ached for him.
He held out his pinky finger.
“You promised.”
“Yeah, I promise. I won’t tell Lawrence.”
“No. It’s okay to tell him. Just don’t let him join. Tell him it’s just me and you, okay?”
“…Uh, okay.”
I wasn’t sure why he was so specific, but I couldn’t fully understand a seven-year-old’s mind. I hooked my finger with his. Only then did he finally smile through his tears.
His face, still puffed up from crying, was so adorable it almost disappeared under his smile. I couldn’t help but press kisses all over his cheeks and eyes. He giggled and said it tickled, blushing.
So this must be what it feels like to raise children. They’re so cute it makes it impossible to let go.
As I held him, I found myself wishing—if only Calisto could stay this small a little longer…
