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Chapter 46
Cecilia, staggering, plopped down onto the ground, frozen for a moment by the unfamiliar sensation, but quickly gathered herself again. Lifting the hem that was in her way with both hands, the cool northern air brushed against her ankles.
Though it was spring, the air still felt chill, reminding Cecilia that she was from the southern regions. Biting her lip, she moved her feet even faster. Then, from afar, a familiar voice faintly reached her ears.
“There you are!”
Turning toward the direction of the voice, Cecilia moved closer, and the faint voice grew clearer. As she expected, Brizny and Eloise were together. Relief washed over her at their calm presence, and she moved toward them—but the words she heard next froze her solid.
“I guess I’m really hopeless! Waaah.”
Hopeless? That was a harsh word for a child just beginning to understand the world. Moreover, judging from Brizny’s tone… Cecilia’s body grew icy with anger. Who dared to insult her daughter like that?
“No, I don’t even need to think… it’s obvious. Who else could it be?”
Slowly rising to her feet, she resolved to punish those who had insulted her child. But the conversation she overheard from the children made her collapse inwardly.
“It was because of me…”
Regret laced the voice. Where had things gone wrong? Cecilia, who had never doubted her best intentions for her children, now saw her past actions in a different light.
Though she had become a parent, Cecilia knew nothing about raising children. What she had cultivated was the refinement expected of nobility. She had thought the best way to care for her children was to hire a nanny and a governess.
‘If I personally raised the children, people would talk. They’d say, “There’s no helping a child of low birth mixed blood.”’
Before, she could easily ignore such remarks. But now that she had children, she could not. While she could endure if people criticized her, she could not bear it if they spoke ill of her children.
Moreover, she did not want them to endure what she had endured. That’s why she left them in the hands of the nanny. She hired a governess to educate them from an early age. No one could meddle carelessly.
“The important thing… wasn’t that…”
Tears of regret streamed from Cecilia’s eyes.
‘The tears Brizny is shedding now… they’re my fault.’
Every action she thought was for her child’s good had been the wrong path. And at the end of that path lay her child’s tears.
“Mom!”
At Brizny’s voice, which echoed through the garden, Cecilia lifted her head. Panting, Brizny stood before her.
“What happened? Why are you crying? Did those crazy southerners say something bad to you again?”
Brizny’s voice was full of indignation, but Cecilia merely looked at her quietly. Trust and affection shone in her daughter’s eyes. Seeing that gaze, Cecilia bowed her head deeply.
“I’m sorry…”
She embraced Brizny as if to protect her from all the bad in the world. And Cecilia vowed: she would ensure no more tears came from her daughter’s eyes. She would fill her life with laughter from now on.
“Huh? Mom, why?”
Brizny, snug in her mother’s arms, tilted her head in confusion. Seeing Cecilia crying, she sighed in relief.
‘Phew, it’s a good thing I didn’t run away when I saw Mom earlier.’
Earlier, Brizny had been rushing to the mansion to show Eloise the Iz collection but saw her mother and thought, “I need to run!” It was fortunate—if it weren’t for Eloise, she might have left without realizing her mother was crying.
‘Brizny, stop and look closely. Cecilia-sama seems to be crying!’
Recalling Eloise’s words that had made her pause, Brizny whispered to Eloise.
“Thanks.”
“No, it’s fine. But… is Cecilia-sama okay?”
Shaking her head, Cecilia reassured her, still holding Brizny as tears continued to fall.
‘It doesn’t seem to be because of those crazy southerners… then what happened?’
Brizny, unable to find an answer despite thinking hard, turned her head to someone who might know.
“Eloise, do you know what’s going on?”
If anyone could understand, it was Eloise, who knew the meanings of even difficult words.
“Well…”
Before Eloise could finish speaking, Cecilia confessed, as if to unburden herself.
“If I had been more careful, I wouldn’t have hired such a nanny and governess…”
Biting her lip as she tried to continue, Cecilia realized that was not the important point. Refocusing on her true feelings, she continued.
“I’m so sorry. As a mother, I should have considered your feelings first…”
Brizny, quietly listening while nestled in her mother’s arms, shook her head. Then she gently wiped the tears from Cecilia’s cheeks and said:
“You don’t need to apologize. Surely, it wasn’t your fault at all.”
“But…”
“I know how much you care about and love me! Someone who loves me wouldn’t hurt me, right? Even if it happened, it wasn’t intentional. So don’t cry. I like you more when you’re smiling than when you’re crying.”
The gaze Brizny gave her, filled entirely with trust and belief, made Cecilia suppress the surge of emotion in her chest.
“I love you, my daughter.”
A warm smile spread across Cecilia’s face.
“I love you too! Mom, Dad, and my brother, all of you!”
Feeling that words alone were insufficient, Brizny made a large circle with her arms to show her love. Then, realizing she had forgotten the most important person, she hurriedly added:
“Oh, right! Eloise too! I love Eloise too!”
Chiding herself silently for forgetting to include her in her declaration of love, Brizny raised her voice.
“Me too! I love you, Brizny!”
Eloise, quietly observing, returned Brizny’s feelings, making Brizny’s cheeks flush red. Forgetting to say it didn’t matter—Eloise had said it back.
“You’re an angel! Totally like Iz-sama!”
“Weren’t you fighting earlier? I thought you two weren’t on good terms because Brizny said something bad.”
Seeing them exchange affectionate words one after another, Cecilia looked on in astonishment.
“I already apologized to Eloise for what I did earlier! And we made up!”
Her daughter’s words made Cecilia’s hands tremble uncontrollably. Could this really be happening?
“We talked just now, and now we’re friends!”
It seemed unbelievable, but it looked like an undeniable fact. Eloise was smiling while holding Brizny’s hand, and Brizny was bouncing with delight.
“Mom, hear that? We’re friends! Eloise, don’t bite, okay?”
“Of course! Why would I bite? I wanted to be friends with adorable Brizny.”
“The best! I get to be friends with an angel!”
Once again, the two showered each other with praise, and Cecilia watched in stunned silence.
What conversation could have made them friends after what happened earlier?
She tried to recall, but nothing came to mind. After all, she had been too shocked by the words she heard upon first seeing the children to catch the rest of the conversation.
“How can they be friends? After what happened back then…”
Cecilia muttered absentmindedly.
“Oh, Mom doesn’t have friends, right?”
“What? No! I have friends!”
“If you mean those people you meet occasionally for tea, that’s not really friends, it’s social acquaintances.”
“…Uh…”
Cecilia opened her mouth to argue but fell silent, lowering her head. Brizny was right; there was nothing incorrect in what she said.
“Brizny, saying that will hurt Cecilia-sama!”
“Eh?”
Brizny widened her eyes in surprise at Eloise’s words.
‘Did I say something bad again? There weren’t even any difficult words…’
Brizny sighed deeply, realizing that the standards for “bad words” in the world were far too complex and varied.
