ITETD 28

Chapter 28

Every time I made eye contact with Calix…
Every time I woke up from a nap and found myself in his arms…
Every time our fingers accidentally touched during a meal…

It was driving me crazy how aware I had become of him.

“It’s weird to feel this way now, especially after we’ve already kissed!”

But no matter how much I shouted that to myself inside, it didn’t help.

It was like being told “Don’t think about elephants,” and ending up thinking about elephants even more.
The more I tried not to think about Calix, the more I couldn’t stop.

“He’s going to notice soon.”

Actually, maybe he already had.
Whenever I stood in front of him, I felt like prey caught in a hunter’s trap.

“Does he even notice me like that?”

He probably did.

But he was very good at hiding it. Unless I paid extremely close attention, I could barely catch a glimpse of how he felt.

Like when he watched me sleep.
Or when I looked away during meals.
Or when I got lost in thought during conversations.

At moments like those, I could clearly feel the heat in his gaze—like a wild animal watching its prey from the shadows.

But outside of those moments? He always looked at me with this calm, polite, emotionless stare. Like he was trying to act like the perfect gentleman.

Should I just tell him to forget all that and act how he really wants?

“But what would he even do if I said that?”

Suddenly, without warning, Calix’s face popped into my view.

“What were you thinking about so hard you didn’t even hear me calling you?”

“……!”

I flinched and jumped in surprise. My mouth hung open and my eyes went wide.

Calix asked,

“Why are you so startled?”

There was no way I could say, “I was thinking about you.”

“I-I was thinking about magic!”

‘Wow, that scared me.’

My heart really felt like it had dropped.

Trying to calm my still-pounding heart, I asked him,

“When did you get here? And why are you here?”

Still flustered, I stuttered a little.

“Just now,” Calix said.

Then he gave me a sly, teasing smile.

“Why?”

And then he said something I never expected.

“Were you having dirty thoughts about me?”

His mischievous words hit my ears like lightning.

“Why is he saying that all of a sudden?!”

Feeling guilty even though I wasn’t, I quickly waved my hands in protest.

“No! Why would I think something like that about you?! Never!”

“But you could have.”

“No way!”

“Alright, alright. Let’s say you didn’t.”

“I didn’t, I really didn’t!”

They say strong denial is basically a confession…

I was flustered and even stood up, shouting in protest.

Calix just leaned against the bedframe, still smiling like it was all very amusing.

“Okay, okay. You’re a pure and innocent Lady Regiana who would never think dirty thoughts about me.”

Then he added,

“Still, I’m not exactly unattractive, you know. Kind of hurts to hear you’ve never imagined anything like that about me.”

“Hey!!”

Yeah. My face turned bright red. Obviously.

“If you’re going to keep talking like that, then get out!”

“Alright, alright! Sorry! I won’t say it again—promise!”

Raising his hands in surrender, he grinned and came closer.

And that’s when I realized:
I had been avoiding him lately.
Now that he suddenly showed up, I fell right into his pace without realizing.

“I need space. Gotta maintain some distance!”

As he came closer, I quickly stepped back.

“Wh-What?”

I gripped the soft blanket tightly in my hands.

“Why are you even here?”

“Why? To ask you to have lunch with me.”

He answered like it was obvious. Like I was the weird one for even asking.

“Oh…”

Well… it was almost lunchtime.

But as soon as I heard his reason, I flopped back onto the bed.

“I don’t feel like eating. I’m not hungry.”

“……”

I lay there, arms and legs spread out, staring at the ceiling.
I firmly decided not to make eye contact with him.

But then… nothing happened.

No usual nagging like:

“You need to eat to stay healthy,”
or
“If you want snacks later, you need to eat now.”

“……?”

I was determined not to look at him—but I gave in.

When I turned my head, Calix was just quietly watching me.

“……What?”

His unusual silence made me ask without meaning to.

Then, as if deep in thought, he opened his mouth.

“You know… sometimes I think you’re just too—”

Knock knock knock.

A knock on the door cut him off.

Both of us turned our heads toward the sound at the same time.

I felt secretly relieved someone had interrupted that tense moment and quickly got up.

“Come in.”

Calix waited for me to get up before answering.

The one who entered was the butler, Mier.
Even seeing the two of us together, he didn’t look surprised—just bowed politely.

“Apologies for the sudden visit, Master. I came to report something. The kitchen says lunch will be delayed by about 30 minutes.”

Calix frowned.

“Why?”

“One of the new assistants got distracted and burned the food.”

“Oof… that newbie is in big trouble.”

I was about to mentally wish the new assistant good luck when Calix turned to me.

“I’m fine with waiting, but Lena might be—”

“I’m fine too. Actually, I’m not really hungry, so please tell them not to prepare anything for me.”

I said it quickly, worried he’d insist.

The butler looked at Calix—as if asking for the final decision.

Calix frowned but nodded.

“Alright. Tell them that. And tell them not to scold the assistant too much.”

“Yes, understood.”

As soon as the butler left and closed the door, I jumped off the bed and walked toward the door.

“Where are you going?”

“To the library. To read.”

I answered firmly, not even looking at him. But I could feel him coming closer again.

“Why aren’t you eating?”

“I’m just not hungry.”

“Skipping meals is bad for your health.”

Strangely, hearing his usual caring scolding actually made me feel better.

“Now that’s the Calix I know.”

I thought I’d say what I usually do:

“Skipping one meal is fine,”
and then he’d say,

“Just have one bite, at least.”

Then I’d pretend to give in, eat a little of his food, and run back to my room.

It was a familiar routine.

But this time, Calix didn’t act like usual.

He paused, as if thinking something over, then said:

“Alright. Read as much as you want and come back.”

Just like that, he let me go. No fuss at all.

…What?

His calm response totally threw me off.

“Why is he acting different today?”

My steps toward the library slowed.

I had wanted to avoid him. But deep down, I also wanted him to act like his usual self.

I liked how things had been. I was comfortable with the shaky but peaceful relationship we had—so long as nothing big happened.

But now, him not insisting, not following me around just to get me to eat…
It made me feel a tiny bit uneasy.

It was dumb.
I wanted to avoid him, but I also wanted him to stay the same.
I was being selfish.

“But is it really so wrong to be a little selfish?”

Even that thought felt selfish.

“Wow, I really don’t have a great personality, do I?”

And that brought back a certain memory…

“I don’t think I had a very nice personality back then.”

Under the moonlight, by the lake.
Holding his hand.

“Regiana Rohelo Troxia.”

“No! Stop thinking about it!”

“Will you marry me?”

“Aaaaagh!”

Just thinking about that made me panic.

How am I supposed to ride in a carriage with him to the capital?
Or sit next to him on the train?
What would we even talk about?

In the empty library, I silently screamed.

In the end, I didn’t even finish one book that day.

I just lay on the library sofa, staring at the ceiling until the sun went down, thinking and overthinking.

About Calix.
And about the challenge we were about to face.

Preparations for the capital were moving along smoothly.

The party the Emperor invited us to was, officially, to celebrate the completion of his glass greenhouse.

Something about being able to enjoy outdoor activities even in winter because of the magic stones and fancy materials.

I think someone explained all that to me. I wasn’t really paying attention.

Anyway, the party was going to last three whole weeks, from late fall into winter.

All to show off that the greenhouse stayed warm even in cold weather.

“How do you even stretch out a party with dancing and eating for three weeks?”

I had to wonder.

But according to Calix, we didn’t have to attend every day. Just whenever we wanted.

The greenhouse would be open all day during the party.

It was impressive—and definitely a flex to show off the royal family’s power.

“Also the perfect excuse to call me to the capital.”

At this point, I was starting to wonder if the Emperor had started building the greenhouse just for this moment.

But my focus was no longer on the Emperor.

Now I was more interested in Calix—who began preparing for the trip to the capital the moment the invitation arrived, like he’d been waiting for it.