IRFVA 03

Chapter : 3

To get straight to the point, I became the (temporary) owner of this tavern and inn.

“Really, you never know what life will bring.”

Standing alone in front of the shop with my hands on my hips, I kept muttering to myself as I thought about how the situation had changed yet again in only a few days.

Several days had passed since I fell into this village, and so much had happened during that time.

First of all, apparently the son who had been living in the lady’s hometown house and managing it had to leave for somewhere far away.

While she had been worrying about what to do with the now-empty house, she said meeting me—someone with nowhere to go—felt like fate guided by God.

‘Just yesterday evening, I dreamed that a white light descended in front of our house, you know?’

‘Pardon?’

‘Wasn’t that a divine revelation? It must’ve been destiny for you to come here!’

Just because of a dream, the lady had hired a complete stranger like me to work at her inn.

I swallowed back the urge to say that sounded like a cultist’s logic.

The lady nodded and said she would return once her son came back, so until then, she asked me to take care of the inn. She guided me around the place here and there.

For someone like me, who had nowhere else to go, it was an unbelievably sweet offer.

I cried at the first kindness I had received since arriving in this world.

I cried while learning the work, and I cried while sleeping too. Seeing me constantly bawling my eyes out and sniffling at every opportunity, the lady seemed to think, This child is a bit lacking, and treated me even more kindly because of it.

Which only made me cry even harder.

Miss Bell was an extremely devout person.

I’d already guessed as much from the moment she entrusted her shop to a complete stranger because of some “divine revelation,” even though I really hadn’t wanted to know that much.

Anyway, thanks to living alongside such a religious woman, I ended up hearing a few things about the gods that had never been explained in detail in the original story.

She recited tales about the one and only god—who apparently didn’t even have a name—like she was chanting the entire Tripitaka. I nearly fell asleep, but I endured it.

To summarize:

“Because there is only one God, there is no need for a name. God simply exists in the world as ‘God,’ governing all things equally. God is fair to everyone and only sends down a representative from the heavens when chaos descends upon the world.”

…That was the lady’s explanation.

I was so sleepy I felt like I could see the River Styx, but I endured all of it out of gratitude toward her.

And I succeeded.

After reminiscing about the time before the lady left, I straightened my back, stretched lightly, and looked around the now-clean inn.

A large wooden shield in the corner caught my eye.

‘You’ll probably need this.’

Perhaps worried about my safety since I’d be running the place alone, the lady had given me a sturdy wooden shield, even teaching me how to use it before cheerfully leaving.

She even worried about my safety.

Touched once again, tears welled up slightly in my eyes.

Finishing my emotional recollection of the lady, I opened my eyes and lifted my head with determination.

Today was my first day as the owner of the inn.

When I first possessed this body, I never imagined things would turn out like this…

But after being thrown out with nothing and left with no way to survive, the only thing I could do now was safely run the inn entrusted to me and somehow stay alive.

My goal was survival in this world.

Right. Back in my original life, hadn’t I also thought at least once:

I’m quitting my job and opening a café! It’ll become a famous Instagram hotspot!

‘If I think of it as a café with a slightly larger scope, it’ll be fine.’

Life was full of twists and turns, and I decided to turn this crisis into an opportunity.

I’d cut my hair short into a bob and changed clothes too.

A triangular headscarf tied behind my head. A slightly worn apron. A brown skirt.

Perfect! I look exactly like a fantasy tavern owner!

Honestly, living here might even be more enjoyable than dealing with those aristocratic bastards going Oh ho ho, how dare a lowly commoner and all that nonsense.

Those people could throw someone away in an instant.

After finishing the cleaning, I went outside and flipped the signboard.

Click.

The sign reading OPEN swung against the wooden door.

I opened the door, stepped down the two stone stairs, and smiled as I looked around—

Crash—!

With the sound of shattering glass, a massive shadow smashed through the tavern wall.

“……”

Too stunned to even speak, I stood frozen as another figure chasing after it burst through the destroyed wall into the tavern.

Craaaash—

Another loud smashing noise rang out, and I slowly turned my head.

“You swagger around town like you own the place, you fraud!”

“Damn it, not here of all places…!”

Two huge men I’d never seen before were fighting inside my tavern, bleeding everywhere after breaking down the wall.

Panicking, I looked around for help, only to find the townspeople standing about five meters away from the tavern muttering things like, “Oh my…”

No, I’m the one who wants to say “Oh my…”

As I frantically looked around, my eyes landed on the shield the lady had left in the corner, saying I might need it.

And at that very moment, one word flashed through my mind.

Romance Fantasy!

I was inside a romance fantasy world!

And what were taverns and inns in fantasy novels?

Places destined to be destroyed and shattered for the sake of dramatic encounters and plot convenience, while the owner cried:

“Dear customers, please don’t do this in here!”

And this building—with a tavern on the first floor and an inn upstairs?

Craaash—!

“Ugh, throwing a teacup? You coward!”

“The fraud’s awfully talkative. Don’t tell me you still don’t know what you did wrong?!”

“Bring it on!”

Watching teacups fly through the air (which I scrubbed spotless at dawn today), plates soaring around (which I cleaned and neatly arranged yesterday), and chairs flying too (which the lady and I repaired together all night long), my sanity finally snapped back into place.

“Dear customers, please don’t do this in hereee—!”

And so, at last, I uttered the legendary line.

* * *

A tattered wooden building.

Broken walls.

Stone fragments scattered across the floor.

Shattered tables.

Not a single intact plate…

…and the shield in the corner staring at me.

“……Life really is…”

I slumped in a chair, staring blankly at the ceiling.

I felt empty.

Just when I thought I’d finally found a way to survive, this damned romance fantasy ruined things again.

“Damn romance fantasy!”

I’d been sacrificed for the Crown Prince’s romance, and now my life as an innkeeper had been sacrificed for fantasy itself.

Since this was a romance fantasy, it honestly felt like both sides were taking turns torturing me.

I let out a hollow laugh.

They say when life gets too hard, all you can do is laugh.

Seems that was true.

With my legs spread wide, sitting in a comfortable posture I’d never dared use back when I was a duke’s daughter, I leaned back in my chair and counted the stars shining beyond the completely destroyed wall and the clean hole in the ceiling, beyond the endless open space above.

It was beautiful.

Was the sky beautiful because this was a romance fantasy too?

That beauty only made me feel bitter.

“Those bastards wreck someone else’s shop and walk away perfectly fine?”

Whether they tearfully reconciled or cleared up some misunderstanding, the two men eventually left the tavern hugging each other and crying.

While I shouted, “Dear customers~!” neither of them paid me any attention.

And if it had ended there, maybe it would’ve just been one ridiculous incident.

But after that, a man came asking if the ruler of the underworld was here.

Then the guards showed up saying, “Hey, if your business is doing well, pay your protection fee.”

Then a mercenary group smashed the remaining windows.

Then someone wearing a robe—obviously a noble no matter how you looked at him—asked, “How many months is it possible to stay at this inn?”

All of this happened in a single day.

“……This is exhausting.”

I was exhausted.

I had already failed to avoid my death flag and been thrown out, and now it felt like even the one thing I barely managed to grasp had failed too.

It felt like no one would help me.

No… all of these problems existed because this was a romance fantasy world.

Starting today, I decided I hated clichés.

“……Haa.”

Letting out a small sigh, I looked up at the sky.

In the empty night with no one passing by, one star shone especially brightly.

“……”

I knelt on the ground and clasped my hands toward the star.

Then I closed my eyes and prayed earnestly.

“Please give the Crown Prince an M-shaped receding hairline.”

Please make him unqualified to be the male lead of a romance story.

When I opened my eyes and looked at the sky again, it seemed like the star trembled slightly, but my wish wasn’t over yet.

Clasping my hands tightly, I spoke my most desperate wish in a loud, clear voice that hardly sounded like prayer at all.

“Oh God, grant me the strength to punish those bastards!”

Please allow me the righteous fist of justice!

When I opened my eyes once more and looked up, the large shining star that had been there moments ago had completely disappeared from the beautiful night sky.

Only a single shooting star streaked across the dark blue heavens.

Standing in the middle of the tavern where the cold wind blew through, I burst into loud laughter.

I hoped that star would crash right onto those damned bastards’ heads.

Under the moonlight, my silver hair gleamed with madness.