HPIM 09

chapter 09

“It’s already been a week since you arrived at Winchester, my lady.”

At Rani’s words, I nodded while munching on an apple.

As she neatly tidied up the bedding I had used, she asked,

“Ah, are you planning to attend Young Master Esteban’s lesson again today?”

‘Hmm… what should I do?’

In truth, ever since the first day I joined Esteban’s lesson after coming to Winchester, I had stubbornly inserted myself into every one of Ellen’s classes.

Ellen, who didn’t know I was a beastkin, simply admired how loyal I seemed—thinking I was just a fox unwilling to leave its master’s side.

‘It’s not loyalty—I’m trying to become human too, human!’

It wasn’t like I had never transformed into a human before, but perhaps because my past-life memories were mixed in, getting the hang of it again was incredibly difficult.

‘It feels like I just need to speed up the mana flow… but how on earth did I do it before?’

Of course, the simplest way would be to stimulate my emotions and trigger the mana channels…

‘Don’t tell me I have to stay angry until my mana speeds up?’

“Whine…”

A sigh slipped out without me realizing.

I had come all the way to Winchester to prevent Esteban from going on a rampage—but what if I failed because I couldn’t transform into a human?

The thought left me with an ominous feeling.

“My lady, are you feeling unwell?”

At Rani’s worried question, I shook my head as if it were nothing and gave my body a little shake.

Coming all the way here only to accomplish nothing would be the worst possible outcome…

‘No. There’s no need to rush. So far, there’s no suspicious person around Esteban, and his mana is stable. That means there’s still some time left.’

Either way, the best way out of this situation was to succeed in transforming into a human as soon as possible.

And for that…

‘The lesson. I need to go to the lesson!’

“Think of it as moving mana throughout every corner of your body—down to your fingertips and toes.”

Alright, so I just move the mana everywhere, right?

“When you spread it throughout your body, you’ll feel the flow slow down, even if only slightly.”

Ah, then I shouldn’t spread it out…

“Once you get used to this, you’ll eventually be able to control it freely—even at the very edges of your senses.”

…Wait, controlling it at the very ends of your senses—that’s essential for transforming into a human, isn’t it?

Then does that mean I should be spreading it everywhere?

“Good work today.”

‘Huh? Already?’

Once again, the lesson ended before I could fully grasp anything. I blankly opened my eyes and looked at Ellen.

He handed a towel to Esteban.

“You’re doing quite well now. I feel relieved.”

“……”

“I know it’s difficult, but you’re truly doing great. Once you get used to it, it won’t feel as hard—so just hang in there a little longer.”

Esteban, seemingly exhausted, buried his face in the towel without replying.

Ellen gently added,

“It’s only natural that this is difficult. If it were easy, most of the Winchester direct line wouldn’t end up losing control.”

‘Right, it’s supposed to be hard. It’s not that I’m incapable or anything!’

Listening to them, I flopped down onto the floor. Honestly, with no real progress, everything felt hopeless.

‘I thought after listening to a couple of Ellen’s lessons, I’d be able to transform again easily.’

I had even planned to boast to Esteban and tell him never to underestimate me again.

‘But I didn’t expect myself to be this clueless.’

Even my first transformation had taken unusually long, and it had been nothing but struggles since then.

The realization that even Ariel—who had been irresponsible and immature—could transform freely, while I still couldn’t, hit me with a wave of self-doubt.

‘…Am I the problem?’

For a moment, I even wondered if it would’ve been better to reform Ariel instead.

Just then, as if something occurred to him, Ellen asked Esteban,

“Come to think of it, I’ve heard rumors that His Highness invited a distinguished guest to prevent your rampages. Is that true?”

Listening absentmindedly, I suddenly felt guilty and straightened up.

No matter how much I tried to deny it, that “distinguished guest” was me.

I considered quietly slipping out of the garden, pretending I hadn’t heard anything, but Esteban spoke first.

“A ‘distinguished guest’? That sounds exaggerated.”

“Haha, well, if they can stop a rampage, it would be fitting—wait, hold on. That reaction… don’t tell me it’s true?”

Seeing Esteban give no answer, Ellen asked again, clearly flustered.

“…Are they already staying at the estate?”

Feeling strangely guilty, I glanced at Esteban.

He smiled brightly at Ellen.

“Someone that capable? We don’t have anyone like that here.”

“What? Really?”

“If we did, I wouldn’t be going through all this effort to slow my mana flow.”

Wow… way to stab my conscience like that.

I just rolled my eyes, trying to hide my embarrassment.

Ellen nodded.

“Well, I suppose that makes sense.”

Hey… could you maybe not agree so easily?

If you agree like that, the useless fennec fox who heard everything is going to feel really miserable.

“It’s just a rumor.”

“Haha, I see.”

“Though honestly, even if such a person existed, who knows if they’d actually have that kind of ability.”

It felt like Esteban was deliberately saying it for me to hear.

‘Hey, that’s unfair. I do have ability! I really do!’

But since I still couldn’t transform, to Ellen I was nothing more than a clingy pet fox. I couldn’t exactly join their conversation.

I narrowed my eyes and glared at Esteban.

As if sensing my gaze, he met my eyes and added with a grin,

“Well, even if they don’t have any ability, it doesn’t matter. Worst case, we can just turn them into a scarf.”

“A… scarf?”

Why does he keep talking about turning things into scarves?!

“As long as they’re useful in some way, isn’t that enough?”

“……”

Just you wait. If nothing else, I’ll transform just to prove you wrong.

So what am I going to do?

What else—if I can’t do it with my own ability, I’ll just use a cheat.

It’s not like I chose this because the lessons were too hard or I was exhausted. Definitely not.

‘I’m doing this for Esteban. Honestly, if he loses control while I’m still a fennec fox, the worst outcome would be for him and the Winchester family, right?’

For a moment, I imagined my own family being wiped out as a consequence—but quickly pushed the thought aside.

…Well, what’s done is done.

Clearing my throat awkwardly, I looked at the bluebells blooming in abundance before me.

If it weren’t for my sharp fennec fox hearing, I would’ve been caught by the servants before even getting here, and my plan to activate my mana flow using bluebells would’ve failed.

‘Well, I didn’t get caught, so it’s fine.’

Deciding I’d repay my “crime” after successfully transforming, I stepped into the field of bluebells.

‘Hmm, just like six-year ginseng is better than one-year, maybe older bluebells are more effective too?’

As I moved deeper into the flowerbed, trying to pick the most potent ones, I suddenly heard someone approaching.

There should still be an hour before Esteban’s lesson…

Instinctively, I flattened myself against the ground.

Then, when I saw who entered the garden, I tilted my head.

…Wait, why is that person here?