DLMS 16

Chapter 16

[So you’re really going to settle things with Kim Jongpil?]

“Yeah, sometime soon.”

As soon as I got home and finished getting ready for bed, the demon asked me that.

[You think you can handle it?]

“I’ll have to try.”

[Good. I like that—but don’t move too hastily. This is about overcoming your greatest pain.]

“Right.”

[That’s exactly why you need to act properly. That way, your heart won’t get hurt. Don’t rush it, but don’t drag it out either.]

“Yeah. I’m not planning to deal with it right away. I’ve got plenty of other things to do… I just kind of blurted it out today because of the mood.”

[Right, you’ve got to submit that club application tomorrow.]

“Yeah, I’ll take care of the things I need to do first. I’ll deal with Jongpil after that.”

There really was a lot I needed to handle.

And to put today’s resolve into action immediately would’ve been unreasonable.

I’d need proper mental control and simulations first.

He was still too difficult an opponent to just crash into head-on.

[Yeah, take it slow. I’ll help you out, too.]

“Tch, you?”

[Hey! You think I clown around for nothing? I only do that to lighten the mood for you!]

“Sure you do… you probably just find it fun.”

[Y-you…! How dare some arrogant, lowly human talk like that to a demon!]

“Sigh…”

[Hey!]

I ignored the demon’s outburst, but honestly, I thought it might be true.

After all, he had made me laugh with funny stories now and then.

I tried to go for a walk to sort out my thoughts, but it didn’t work.

Even more than during the day, my mind was noisy.
But I did learn one thing.

That sudden meeting with Lee Jongin, and all the talking we did—it was way more effective than organizing my thoughts alone.

I didn’t exactly clear my head, but somehow it felt like a breeze was blowing through one corner of my heart.

I’d read somewhere before:

Sometimes, it’s easier to open up to a stranger than to a close friend.

Back then, I couldn’t understand what that meant.
But now, I think I get it.

People live by making relationships with others, floating along inside them.

‘So this is how it feels…’

Taehyun was already someone who had become “inertia” and “routine” in my life.

But opening even a small part of my heart to someone else turned out to be a bigger refreshment than I expected.

On his way home after meeting Yoo Jaehui, Lee Jongin realized why Jaehui had been on his mind.

In one sense, he felt relieved.
But at the same time, there was discomfort and regret.

Jaehui was so talented in music, yet he’d gone through such a difficult school life. Because of that, he seemed to carry a gloomy corner in him.

The only reason Jongin had looked down on Jaehui until now was simple:

He thought Jaehui was just some poser doing music for show.

That judgment had been based solely on what Kim Jongpil told him.
But now, he was sure his thoughts had been wrong.

It was true he had harbored prejudice.
But it was a prejudice born from his own sincerity toward music.

And today, he gained a big realization.

The reason he had been paying attention to Jaehui was pity. Compassion.

He already knew Jaehui wasn’t very social.
But now, he confirmed what he’d only guessed before: Jaehui never treated music lightly.

Jongin wanted Jaehui to succeed.

Of course, his own success came first.
But strangely, he also wanted to root for him, even help him.

Because he couldn’t stand the thought of a skilled artist like that being alienated by society.

He told himself that these small actions were, in a way, for all artists everywhere.

And one more thing kept nagging at him:
The fact that Kim Jongpil had been a school bully.

Jongpil’s little behaviors had been grating for a while, but now…
Future interactions with him were going to feel very uncomfortable.

Still, it wasn’t a huge obstacle—just one semester left until graduation.

“Hoo…”

Before stepping into his house, he exhaled smoke from a burning cigarette.
Unlike the cigarette, his worries only kept dragging on.

“Damn it. Whatever. I just hope he joins our club.”

“Hey, good morning.”

“Oh, hey. Morning.”

Two days had passed since my performance.

Not a long time at all, yet so much in my daily life had changed.

Or rather, not many things had changed—just one big thing.

“Hyung, I think I’m dying…”

“Didn’t sleep much?”

“No, hangover…”

“Ah… Well, nap until class starts. I’ll wake you up.”

“Yeah…”

Now, people were talking to me first.

Sure, plenty of students still greeted me awkwardly, or pretended not to see me.
But this level felt just right.

Any more people approaching me, and I think I’d break down.

Only two were openly proactive: Kim Taehun and Han Seolhee.

Still, just having someone sit near me now—it felt good.

[Hey, it’s nice you’re making friends, but don’t forget what you need to do.]

‘Yeah, I know. I’m on my way.’

That day, I came to school earlier than usual.

I left the lecture hall and headed to the notice board outside the department office.

—Groovy Nation Club: Recruiting Members Anytime.
…
—Refer to the university homepage for the application form.

“Hm…”

[So you didn’t even need to come early.]

‘So it’s online applications.’

Last time, I hadn’t noticed because there was so much unnecessary text between the “recruiting anytime” and “apply online” lines.

[Let’s go. You’ll have to do it at home.]

‘Yeah, okay.’

—Click.

Just then, the office door opened, and I ran into Kim Jongpil.

“Oh, uh, hey.”

“Oh, hey, Jaehui. I saw your performance. You’ve gotten way better.”

“Ah, thanks.”

“Oh, wait, your voice…”

“Yeah.”

“Sounds a little…”

“…What.”

[He’s right. Ever since you got that vocal ability boost, your speaking voice has more solid projection. Of course, only someone who’s known you a long time would notice.]

‘Ah… Taehyun didn’t say anything though.’

[Guess he’s just dull.]

“Hm… never mind. Anyway, you’re super popular now. All my friends keep asking me about you.”

“Ah… I see.”

“Yeah, let’s get drinks sometime with everyone. Man, Yoo Jaehui’s a total star now!”

“Yeah, thanks…”

[Hmph…]

“Some of our fellow class of ’13 friends saw your performance that night too. Let’s all have a drink. They’re curious about you.”

I had spotted those guys from a distance at the ceremony.
But I wasn’t interested in their reactions.

“Well, maybe if I have time…”

It was my usual response.

Hating it, but unable to refuse outright.

But deep down, my heart was changing—and only the demon noticed.

[Hmph… Good. Very good.]

‘What is?’

Of course, even I hadn’t realized it myself yet.

“Ah, I’ve got class now…”

“Yeah, got it. Have a good one!”

“Yeah, thanks…”

I had decided to deal with him.
But this wasn’t the right timing.

Scratch, scratch…

Because of a surprise quiz in a liberal arts class, the lecture hall was filled only with the scratching of pens and pencils.

[Wow, you’re pretty smart, huh.]

‘Studying is just… whatever.’

[Still, gotta be good at something. Hahaha!]

‘Sheesh…’

[Done already?]

‘Yeah, finished.’

[Of course… even in this age, smart guys are still the ones good at music too.]

After writing my last answer, I looked around. Everyone else still had their heads down, hard at work.

Some students—including Taehun—had their heads down, hard asleep instead.

[You’re not gonna go, right?]

‘No. Absolutely not.’

He meant the drinking invitation from Jongpil.

There was no way I’d let myself be used as a tool for his boasting.

‘Oh, right. Earlier, what did you mean by “good”?’

[Heh heh… Do you know the difference between the strong and the weak?]

‘Hmm… strength?’

[Not wrong. But at the root, it’s whether or not they have fear.]

‘Hmm…’

[I felt anger from you earlier.]

‘I guess I did, kind of…’

Thinking back, I had spoken more confidently than before.
Maybe that was thanks to the anger.

[You were still afraid, like always. But this time you had anger toward him. Before, you couldn’t even bring yourself to hate him—you just cowered.]

‘Now I’ve decided to act…’

After meeting Jongin, I made up my mind.

If I really wanted to change, I had to overcome Kim Jongpil.

Maybe that resolve was what was making me stronger.

[That anger will one day smother your fear. And you’ll stand above as the strong one…]

‘Well, yeah… Oh, right. When I go meet Jongpil, I want you to stay inside me, just in case.’

[Why, you think I’ll yap too much? Hey, no matter how chatty I am, I know when to shut up in serious situations.]

‘No, it’s just… my thoughts might get tangled again.’

[Oh-ho. So you can be considerate of me too? Arrogant brat.]

‘Didn’t you say it’d be tough for you too?’

[Well, I’ll see how it goes and decide.]

He didn’t say he would.

But I thought maybe what he meant was:
If things got hard, he’d stay with me.

Even if that was what he meant, there was no way that tsundere demon would ever admit it.

“Alright, time’s up. Pass your papers to the back.”

[Ha… a perfect score. Perfect.]

“Hyung, what are you doing now? Going home?”

Classes ended at 2 p.m. today.

“Yeah, I’ve got to go home and submit the club application.”

“Whoa, no way! You’re applying to Groovy Nation!”

“Seriously?”

“Uh, well, yeah…”

I answered casually, not realizing how loud Taehun’s voice was.

That loudness caught Seolhee’s attention as she was packing up slowly.
And soon, my other classmates too turned their heads toward me.

“Wow, you’re applying there?”

“Yeah, well… I thought I’d give it a try, once.”

“Haha…”

“Ah, too bad. I was gonna ask you to go to karaoke today.”

“Ah, sorry. How about tomorrow?”

“Oh! You’re free tomorrow?”

“Yeah, tomorrow’s fine.”

“Okay then! Good luck with the application today. See you tomorrow, hyung!”

“Oh, uh, yeah… sure.”

To this day, the only ones who really talked to me actively were those two.

Everyone else just exchanged greetings at best.

Taehun’s over-the-top antics were exhausting, but honestly… fun.

Suppressing a laugh, I headed home.

“Let’s see… of course there’s an audition…”

[Well yeah, it’s a music club. Didn’t you hear it’s tough to get in?]

“Yeah, that’s what I heard. But for something supposedly strict, it’s just a single audition.”

[Guess the process itself isn’t complicated. Anyway, good luck. You’ll do fine.]

—Ping!

“Huh?”

I was skimming the application form when my phone buzzed.

[Whoa, no way, you actually get messages?]

“Stop exaggerating. Taehun texts me all the time.”

[Not during the day. He only texts after work, remember.]

“….”

I had nothing to say.

“Ugh, shut up.”

After losing another round to the demon, I checked my phone.

—Han Seolhee

“Oh, it’s Seolhee.”