🔊 TTS Settings
Chapter 1
Life Is Unpredictable, and Therefore Life Is…
“…What a miserable mess.”
Sitting alone on the sofa while carefully retracing the memories of my past life, that was the only conclusion I could come to.
Losing Mother had already been hard enough, but the memories that resurfaced at the moment of her death were hardly pleasant either. Honestly, I had been in a terrible mood these past few days.
I swung my feet that couldn’t quite reach the floor.
Reliving unhappy memories wasn’t exactly enjoyable, but I had no choice. The memories I possessed as Asha contained very little useful information, so I needed to examine my former life instead.
So then…
Before I was born as Asha—the treasured jewel and only daughter of the proud Grand Duchess Rosalind—my name had been Beatrice Ricard.
Truthfully, even back then my status had not been inferior to what it was now.
The House of Ricard was unquestionably the greatest noble family in the Empire. The very first Duke of Ricard had been one of the founding heroes who established the Empire alongside the first Emperor himself. Even nobles who held the same ducal title had to bow their heads before the Duke of Ricard.
Beatrice Ricard—that is, my former self—had been the precious jewel of the reigning duke. I was also a much younger child, born long after my only older brother.
Naturally, I should have received all the family’s affection.
But reality was different.
Because I wasn’t a mage.
In the Empire, “mage” was practically another word for “noble.”
Even if someone was born a commoner, the moment they awakened magical power, they would immediately be granted knighthood.
Only mages could purify the mysterious corruption that devoured habitable land. Only mages could defeat the monsters that emerged from the devastated demonic territories.
In an Empire where desperate battles to preserve humanity’s living space were a daily reality, mages were resources more precious than anything else.
“Cheap noble titles! Dear mage, please stay with us!”
That was basically how it worked.
I didn’t even need to look far for an example. The current Duchess of Ricard—my mother in my previous life—had originally been a commoner herself. Yet through mastering extraordinary magic, she rose to enter the greatest noble house in the Empire.
In a country where even commoners could become high-ranking nobles so long as they possessed powerful magic—
I had been born a noble, yet incapable of using magic.
That was me.
“I heard the young Lady Ricard still hasn’t awakened magic?”
“Forget magic—I heard she can’t even sense mana.”
“Good heavens. The Ricard bloodline is supposed to be blessed above all others. How could such a thing happen?”
“A fine horse giving birth to a pig, I suppose. Perhaps it can’t be helped when half her blood is lowborn…”
“If I had given birth to a child like that, I’d rather die with them.”
“I agree. I don’t know how she even dares show her face.”
In a world where magic was called a blessing—
my nickname was the Cursed Lady.
Normally, children awakened magic before the age of six at the latest. Some exceptionally gifted children could sense the flow of mana as early as three or four years old. In the Empire, people described it as “magic visiting in the middle of the night to leave behind a gift.”
The timing differed from person to person, but no one ever went beyond ten years old without receiving magic’s gift.
At seven years old, people began openly voicing doubts and concerns about me.
“Still no news from the young Lady Ricard?”
“Strange. I heard her mana evaluation at birth showed extraordinary results.”
“Extraordinary? It was the highest score ever recorded. The measuring device even broke. His Majesty himself had high expectations for her…”
“Well, she’s only seven. Perhaps good news will come if we wait a little longer.”
Only magic could inflict meaningful damage on corruption beasts.
Without magic, the world humanity lived in could not survive even a single day.
The first Emperor of the Empire had himself been a mage from the Golden Age, when magic flourished far more than it did now. A great mage who defended humanity’s lands from massive waves of corruption and monster invasions.
The mages of the Golden Age who fought alongside the first Emperor founded the Empire after the war.
Every mage born since then was descended from the first Emperor or one of the founding heroes.
In other words, anyone incapable of using magic had effectively lost the right to call themselves descendants of the Empire’s founders.
So every night, I clasped my hands together and prayed.
“When will magic come to me too?”
No answer ever came.
Another year passed uneventfully, and I turned eight.
Even more desperately, I asked:
“Why hasn’t magic come to me yet? Is it because I’m a bad child?”
As the days passed, my anxiety only deepened.
Every night I knelt in prayer, repenting for sins I didn’t even understand, begging for magic to come to me too—even just the tiniest scrap of it.
But in the end, I became the child who never received magic’s gift.
On the most miserable tenth birthday in the world, I cried so hard I thought my eyes might melt away.
And even then, I hid myself while crying because I feared being mocked if anyone heard me.
I wish I had at least… been unable to see.
Or unable to hear.
Unable to speak.
I would even have accepted crippled legs, or never walking at all.
Anything was better than being completely unable to use magic.
Please.
Even afterward, I still fell asleep hoping for a miracle—for magic to finally arrive.
But just as before, nothing happened.
At last, Father officially gave up on me.
“There’s no point expecting anything more from you. I’m done wasting money on pointless nonsense.”
“Father…!”
Trying to stop him from leaving the room, I threw myself onto the floor without hesitation. I clung desperately to his pant leg and begged.
“Please, Father. Please.”
“Let go.”
“I won’t disappoint you again—ah!”
Father twisted his lips coldly and violently shook me off.
Kicked aside, I rolled pathetically across the floor.
After that day, everyone began treating me with contempt as though they had finally received permission.
“My apologies, Lady, but could you stand farther away? What if your curse spreads and weakens my mana?”
“I do feel sorry for His Grace. If only she didn’t resemble him so perfectly, perhaps they could at least pretend she wasn’t truly his daughter…”
It was true.
I possessed the dark blue hair and blue eyes passed down through generations of the Ricard family. Outwardly, I looked every bit like a proper and dignified daughter of the ducal house.
If only I hadn’t possessed that appearance, perhaps I might have been cast out and allowed to live another life somewhere else.
But as though fate were mocking me, no such option was ever given.
And so, I couldn’t bring myself to give up.
Around that time, if I heard even the slightest rumor about something that might help awaken magic, I tried it without question.
Of course, there wasn’t much I could do. Father had already withdrawn all support meant to help me awaken as a mage.
“Did you know, Lady?”
Even knowing the girl my age was only speaking maliciously—
“They say drinking dew touched by moonlight on a crescent-moon night strengthens magical power. So who knows? Maybe if you gathered a hundred bottles of dew and drank them, even you might finally be able to use magic.”
—I still couldn’t let go of even that tiny straw of hope.
