TLDWAE 43

Chapter 43

“Whatever it is, just tell me.”

“You’re so forward it’s scary. How much do you want for payment?”

“I’m not asking for money.”

At his unexpected refusal, Caria tilted her head with a faint smile. She had never been stingy with Noah. If he asked, she would have reimbursed him for even the cost of buying a title. Why was he turning it down? Wasn’t money supposed to be the most important thing to a mercenary company?

She had already entrusted him with over a million gold. That alone was enough to buy a castle in the provinces and live more luxuriously than a local lord. So what on earth could be so great that it tempted him more than that?

When Caria stared intently at his face with eyes that alone weren’t smiling, Noah parted his lips several times before making up his mind and speaking.

“I want to make my lady smile.”

His beautiful face flushed like that of a boy confessing his first love, and he said something she hadn’t expected in the slightest. Caria’s probing expression instantly collapsed, and she could only gape and ask blankly, “What?”

“I like it when you laugh, even if it’s a mocking laugh. I like seeing you chuckle at something funny. And even more, I want to see you smile because you’re happy. For some strange reason, seeing you smile makes me happy too. That’s why I want to make you smile more.”

Caria’s face went blank with surprise. Part of it was because Noah had suddenly said something strange, but it was also because she had heard almost the same words before.

“Smile. Your smile is the most beautiful thing of all.”

Gilford was a kind and considerate man, but of all things, he spoke most often about her smile. He always said he wanted to see her smiling face. That was why, at some point, she began to smile reflexively even when upset, even when angry.

Because she always wanted to show him the face he loved.

“…I should go upstairs and wash up for a bit. We’ll discuss the details of the request later. Butler, prepare the carriage for an hour from now.”

Caria avoided his eyes and headed to the second floor. She seemed far more shaken than she expected, which left Noah flustered too.

He couldn’t stop her as she hurried up the stairs, and could only watch her back. Just then, Shagal silently stepped up beside him.

“Sorry to ruin the mood when things seemed to be going well with the boss, but don’t forget to ask about the forest when you get a chance. Our future depends on it.”

“…I know.”

Noah shoved away his subordinate’s head as it intruded close to his ear and let out a deep sigh.

Was I too hasty? he wondered gloomily, loosening the cravat that felt strangling. When he’d left the tailor’s shop, he thought he looked perfect—but if there was no one to appreciate that perfection, it was meaningless.

“Late, aren’t you.”

The Archduke, returning late at night to the castle, was greeted by his wife’s composed voice. The Archduchess signaled a servant to take his outer coat. The Archduke nodded in acknowledgment, then turned to climb the stairs toward his chambers.

But unusually, the conversation did not end there.

“What’s to be done about that girl?”

“……”

The Archduke stopped and turned back to her. With a single gesture, he dismissed the servants. In the dimly lit entry hall, lit by only a lamp or two, the two of them stood, unmoving, staring at one another.

“His Majesty has not permitted a divorce.”

“And Caria accepted that?”

“This isn’t something that can be decided by her feelings alone.”

“It’s her marriage. If not her feelings, then what else decides it?”

Her voice, raised in rare agitation, left him momentarily speechless. But after swallowing once, he forced a flat, detached tone as he replied.

“We can’t allow her to bring further disgrace to the Imperial family.”

“She has done nothing wrong. You know that as well as I.”

“Even if it isn’t her fault, it’s because of her. His Majesty had no choice—”

“Caria’s father isn’t His Majesty. It’s you.”

The Archduchess bit her pale lips, glaring at her husband. The Archduke rubbed his forehead wearily, exhaling a deep sigh. His face made clear he had no desire to continue this discussion.

“After all I said then… do I look ridiculous now, worrying about that child?”

“My lady, let’s not bring that up again…”

“Do you—do you resent me?”

The Archduchess closed her troubled eyes, but her lids trembled violently. Whether it was anger, regret, or sorrow, she couldn’t tell. The emotion trickled from deep within her memories.

I hated that child. That child who, with an innocent face, came to shatter my happiness.

When that woman brought Caria to the castle, the Archduchess felt as though the sky had collapsed for the first time in her life.

Born a high noble’s daughter, married to an Archduke, and mother of two sons. For a political marriage, theirs wasn’t a bad one. She was frail in health, but otherwise her life was decent. That is, until that child appeared.

You should have paid a hundred thousand gold, not ten thousand, to send her back! How could you bring into our castle a child you had outside?

She is my daughter. How could I send away my own child? She is of royal blood too.

The Archduke claimed it was a single mistake made in drunkenness, but the Archduchess couldn’t simply take his word. If one child came, what was to stop another, or a third, from arriving?

Yet seeing that golden hair and red eyes, she couldn’t deny the truth. That child was his blood.

And so, choking on her own bitterness, she said:

Fine. Since she is your daughter, she must be granted the rights of royalty. But promise me one thing.

—What is that?

Do not love her. If I ever see you treating her with kindness, the way you do Grenberik or Alcard, I will pack my things and return to my family at once. From that moment, I will never see you or the children again. Remember that.

The Archduke endured her countless accusations and reproaches, and he accepted even that cruel demand. He left Caria’s upbringing to the butler and servants, keeping his distance beyond necessity.

Thus Caria grew isolated and withered within the household. Every time the Archduchess saw her, she felt guilty. Yet whenever she saw Caria shrink in fear of her, she also felt suffocated. Whose fault was it that my life was ruined? And still, it always made her feel like the villain in Caria’s eyes.

“You should be the one to resent me.”

“Yes. I resent you.”

“Then do so until your heart is at ease.”

“But this time, we must help Caria. It was you and I who forced that marriage on her.”

Both the Archduke and Archduchess had found it unbearable to keep watching Caria in their household. So when she came of age and a suitable match appeared, they hurried to force the marriage through.

They told themselves it would benefit everyone—since Caria also struggled to endure life in the Archduke’s house—and entrusted her to strangers they hardly knew.

And this was the result. So now it was a problem the two of them had to resolve. But…

“We cannot oppose His Majesty’s will over something like this. He is not only my elder brother but the Emperor of this nation.”

With that, the Archduke ended the conversation and turned away. But the Archduchess knew it was an excuse. After over twenty years with him, how could she not?

He was running away. He always had. He was never one to take initiative in solving problems before him. He followed rules, or someone else’s orders, so that later, if trouble came, he could shift the blame.

“Coward.”

And weak. Pretending otherwise didn’t change it. Later, when everything was over, he would only be left with unbearable regret.

And yet, the Archduchess could not leave this pitiful man. She thought herself a fool for it, but the anxious trembling of his eyes filled her with pity without end.

“Must you really carry me from here?”

“Why, are you afraid of heights?”

Noah carried a large burden in his arms as he walked, carefully smoothing the wrinkles from his freshly donned knight’s uniform with his free hand. At his teasing, the small child hidden deep under a hooded robe scowled fiercely, though the expression could not be seen.

“I’m only worried your weak arms will strain themselves.”

“I’m not so fragile that a five-year-old should be concerned for me. Though, you are heavier than you look.”

At that, a little foot kicked Noah’s side. The child muttered an apology as if by mistake, but there was no sincerity in the tone.

Just then, as Noah carried the child in one arm and rubbed his sore ribs with the other, a shadow fell across his path.

“You—Caria’s man? What are you doing here? And like that…?”

The voice, full of disapproval, belonged to Alcard, clad in the Imperial Knights’ uniform. His question was only natural.

Because in this early morning hour, they were standing on the path that led directly to the Imperial Audience Hall.

Noah instinctively tightened his hold on the child and arranged his expression into polite formality.

“I’ve come to pay respects to His Majesty the Emperor. I didn’t have the chance to say it yesterday, but—I am a noble, after all. Baron Noah Trantes. My domain is in poor shape, so I also take mercenary work on the side.”