Chapter 28
A woman fast asleep entered Jaeger’s view.
Between them, only a single lightstone glowed.
In that faint light, her peaceful face contrasted with her awkward, curled-up posture.
Fair skin without makeup, long eyelashes, delicate features, and a smooth jawline.
Rolled-up sleeves and hair tied carelessly in a bun.
For a moment, over that wretchedly detestable woman’s face, the image of a girl floated up.
When was it again?
Ah, on the day of the picnic.
The three children, having mounted their horses, were fooling around when one kicked the horse’s rump, causing them to be dragged off to some unknown place.
Shhh—
Rain poured down as if the sky had been torn open.
Beneath a steep cliff, the boy huddled, trembling as his body lost heat, when the girl shouted above him:
“I’m not going alone! I’ll never leave you behind!”
And so, until the moment she managed to fetch an adult who rescued them, the girl stayed to protect the boy.
“Ha.”
Jaeger pulled himself out of the memory with a scornful laugh.
It was a memory now dim with age.
He barely recalled it—and didn’t want to recall it.
And yet, why, why now—
“I’m not going alone, never. How could I leave you behind?”
Why was that what came to mind?
Jaeger rubbed his tired face and let out a deep sigh.
Yes, damnably enough, he had once known the childhood of the woman who now smiled so brightly.
But just as the cruel adult had swallowed up the girl she once was, it had all become so blurred he could no longer tell dream from reality.
The Redria he remembered most clearly was one who smiled by day and turned vicious by night.
She struck him with a smiling face, wept and begged forgiveness, then sang cheerily as though nothing had happened.
Sometimes she tormented servants so savagely it was impossible not to call her mad.
And yet, she clung to him alone.
“I’m sick, Jaeger!”
Especially on days he had promised to meet Loeni, she would summon him countless times.
The boy was troubled, but in some secret part of him—glad.
Even though she had changed, he still liked her.
Because she depended on him. Because she called for him.
He despised himself for being so low, but since those feelings came from her, he accepted them willingly.
At least, until the incident that made him recoil in horror.
The girl insisted on a nighttime meeting.
“You must come. No matter what happens, you have to come see me, okay?”
“But that day I promised Loeni…”
“I like you, Jaeger.”
“…”
“…I like you. So please, come to me.”
Drunk on the ecstasy of first love, the boy could only nod as if bewitched.
But that night, when he went to apologize to Loeni for breaking his promise, he happened by chance to save her from danger.
When he heard the assassin’s confession, his blood dripped down his clenched eyes in despair.
“She lured me away to kill Loeni.”
Jaeger raged.
The one he loved had used him to harm his friend.
Shame, humiliation, self-loathing, betrayal—all corroded him.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Loeni.”
Simply because he loved Redria, he felt guilty toward Loeni.
That was when he began to treat her with utmost devotion, determined to care for her, scarred as she was.
And when he grew older, he defied the late Duke’s opposition to join the Holy Knights.
Years later, now a young man, he saw Redria again at a ball.
Despite rumors she had spent time in reflection, she appeared excessively decadent.
A gaudy dress, dripping jewels, heavy makeup. The modest girl who once wrinkled her nose at bitter tea was gone.
Behind her fan, her eyes skimmed him with contempt.
The gaze one gives something beneath vermin.
His chest froze while his head burned.
Redria had not repented in the slightest.
He had thought, one day, she would repent, beg Loeni’s forgiveness.
That maybe the three of them could return to how they once were.
But that was all an illusion.
The girl he liked had always been vicious.
Realizing that, he laughed bitterly at himself for hoping her confession had been true.
He resented her for exploiting his feelings.
He was disappointed in her for betraying and mocking his friend.
That day Jaeger swore—
He would never be deceived again.
Whatever she said, he would always doubt.
He would scorn her, as she so easily discarded people.
And so the bright memories grew darker and darker, until they were blackened entirely.
“Haa…”
Jaeger pressed hard under his brow with a heavy sigh.
His heart sank cold and damp. He knew he had no time to wallow in such worn-out memories.
He needed to get out, secure Loeni, and protect her.
“So why the hell am I still letting this woman sway me?”
His gray eyes slit open, fierce.
“From the start, I should never have cared about her.”
Watching men fall prey to her deception only reminded him of the fool he once was. He couldn’t bear to just watch.
He sighed deeply, leaning his head against the wall.
When he closed his eyes, he suddenly recalled holding Redria’s hand. Grinding his teeth, he clenched his fist on his knee.
“Damn it…”
Just being near her made him restless, uneasy.
Receiving her kindness filled him with guilt toward Loeni.
And yet his head brimmed with thoughts of her.
“Jaeger, will you stay with me tonight?”
“That’s troublesome.”
“But yesterday the curtains fluttered and a man’s ghost appeared! I can’t sleep alone. Please?”
“…Just for tonight.”
“Yay! Then will you come sleep on the bed with me?”
“…That’s not happening.”
“Why not?”
“…”
“Hm? Why not?”
“…You’re not ready to know yet.”
“Then will you at least hold my hand?”
“Just tonight.”
“That excuse again? I don’t believe you anymore. You always give in to my requests.”
“Well, it’s because I…”
The youthful boy’s voice scattered like a mirage.
His long navy lashes trembled, and his lids fluttered open.
Sunlight spilled across his composed face.
Raising a hand to shield his eyes, his gray pupils darkened beneath the shadow.
It had been a long time since he dreamed of that girl so vividly.
I spent the night trapped in the burrow.
When I woke, the tunnel collapsed, leaving the ground flat again.
That meant I was suddenly facing dozens of zombies patrolling above. I almost fainted—until the rabbit monster saved me.
It hopped back to me and opened its maw wide, swallowing the zombies whole.
Grinning in satisfaction, I turned to the rabbit following behind.
“Want some jerky later?”
“Kyuuu!”
The rabbit shook its plump rump happily as it trotted along.
I smiled faintly, supporting Jaeger as we walked.
Though he kept batting my hand away, saying he didn’t need help, I threatened him with, “Do you want to go back to the Empire or not?” Only then did he obey.
At last, we reached the spot guided by the brooch…
“Looks like I wasn’t the only one who had an amazing night.”
Cien and the Crown Prince were a sorry, pitiful sight.
Cien dragged a tattered blanket behind him, his ivory cheeks and eyes marred with thin red scratches.
“Well, those cuts were there a few days ago, but I ignored them since they looked bothersome.”
The real problem was the Crown Prince. His torn shirt revealed a hole in his abdomen—what looked like a gunshot wound. But since he was still alive, it didn’t seem fatal.
I glanced between the two men.
“…What happened to you?”
Cien twirled around with a smile.
“Nothing at all.”
But that smile felt oddly oppressive.
“…”
The Crown Prince glared at him, sneering as if Cien disgusted him.
I studied them, then smiled faintly.
“Hmm, better not ask. Sounds like a headache.”
It wasn’t the first time they fought.
In the original story, every time they met, they’d enter the subspace and try to kill each other.
Whatever the reason, however much they fought—so long as they were alive, that was enough.
The Crown Prince turned away from Cien and rolled his neck.
“Nothing happened to the lady, I trust?”
“Nothing…”
My words stuck. I didn’t know why, but oddly, I couldn’t speak.
Cien smiled sweetly as he stepped closer.
“What happened to you, Miss Ria?”
“…”
…Could you please stop shoving that revolver in Jaeger’s face before asking?
Smack—
Jaeger swatted the gun aside, annoyed.
“There was no incident.”
I scratched my cheek and nodded.
“Yes, nothing at all.”
Well, aside from being stuck a little too close together.
If the Crown Prince found out, he’d make a fuss—this was the man who insisted on separating bunk beds, after all.
If Cien found out, he’d be even more insufferable.
He was already spinning the cylinder, his violet eyes glinting.
So I lied for convenience’ sake. But… it felt strange.
What is this?
A dull, uncomfortable ache pressed inside my chest.
