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chapter 16
The emperor’s piercingly blue gaze lingered on me. I struggled to avoid flinching under it.
“Then, I shall report comfortably according to Your Majesty’s wishes.”
Though I was far from comfortable, I answered as such. Fortunately, my voice did not tremble this time.
Feeling somewhat relieved, I carefully recounted to the emperor the events that had taken place in the southern slums.
After hearing everything, the emperor stood up and began pacing slowly around me.
With each echoing tap of his polished shoes, my hands twitched involuntarily.
The scent he carried—reminding me of a summer forest—was almost intoxicating.
Finally, the emperor stopped beside me, standing slightly at an angle, and let out a soft chuckle.
“Princess, why don’t you breathe?”
It was only then that I realized I had been holding my breath. I exhaled carefully, and he added,
“You can stop trembling your hands too.”
Embarrassment flushed my cheeks. The emperor continued to gaze down at me, and the already deep blue of his eyes seemed even deeper.
“Seeing you like this, I almost feel like the villain here.”
His angled smile was beautiful. That only made it more aggravating, loosening the seal on my lips.
“Are you enjoying this?” I asked.
“Enjoying what?”
“This teasing of me.”
“Well, to say I’m not intrigued would be a lie.”
The emperor chuckled lightly as he answered. Every word resonated warmly, like the timbre of a fine wooden instrument.
For a moment, it felt as though his sharp aura softened slightly.
He paused, seemingly gauging something, and continued to study me quietly.
I blushed but did not look away. An odd feeling told me I would “lose” if I did.
Then the emperor smiled with his eyes.
The sharp, elongated shape of them curved unexpectedly into a crescent, and he seemed like a different person.
I couldn’t help but stare at him, almost entranced.
“Princess Esperanza, you’ve finally graduated from being the rogue of the Duchy. Congratulations.”
His teasing words snapped me back to reality.
“Your Majesty, please stop teasing me. It is not pleasant.”
I spoke without fear, saying exactly what I wanted.
“Princess, I am serious. You successfully delivered food to the poor in the southern slums.”
I tensed again at the echo of his footsteps pacing around me.
“And even when facing the incubus swarm and the threat to your life, you tried to save as many people as possible.”
Finally, the annoying, crisp sound of his shoes stopped right in front of me.
“At that point, I suppose I can no longer call you the reckless rogue.”
Despite the emperor’s seemingly mocking tone, his words were full of praise.
I felt my chest swell at the recognition.
Yet, as if deliberately trying to spoil my pride, the emperor continued.
“However, it seems Count Cairus did not prepare you properly. Had he done his job well, you wouldn’t have faced that many incubuses there.”
His sharp gaze now turned toward Count Cairus.
“If you hadn’t met the royal head magician, things could have gone very badly.”
Every low murmur of his voice carried clearly, tinged with displeasure.
“It was my fault, Your Majesty. I apologize to the princess as well,” Count Cairus said, bowing his head in regret.
I couldn’t bear to see him blaming himself so intensely.
“It’s not my teacher’s fault, Your Majesty. He did his best to educate me before I was dispatched.”
“No, Princess. There are things I failed to teach you. I should have anticipated that this would lead to such a result.”
Count Cairus still bowed, taking all blame upon himself.
I glanced at the emperor, confused, only to notice something strange about him.
Click.
The sound of the emperor stepping back echoed unusually loudly.
He muttered to himself, frowning deeply, one hand pressed against his forehead, looking as if his head ached.
“Y-Your Majesty?”
“It seems the emperor is conversing with the gods,” Count Cairus explained calmly, as if this were entirely normal. Meanwhile, the emperor looked in agonizing pain.
Moments ago, I had resented him for blaming my teacher; now I felt pity.
Count Cairus and I waited helplessly for the episode to pass.
Eventually, the emperor regained composure and looked down at me with those piercing eyes as if nothing had happened.
“Now you understand what it is like when I converse with the gods. They insisted I must inform you as well.”
There was a faint weariness in his deep blue eyes.
“There is always a price for sudden changes in the emotions of a crowd. Disturbing the balance of power, even to the point of summoning incubuses.”
I lost my words for a moment.
Though he spoke in the imperial tongue, I could not fully grasp the meaning.
Count Cairus explained quietly, still looking guilty.
“When you distributed food in the extremely hot southern slums and even created a lake, the poor would have been collectively overjoyed.”
The unusually gentle tone in his words caught my attention. It was a soothing tone, meant to comfort me when I did something wrong.
“…And so?”
“Though it was a positive change, it was so sudden that it seems it attracted the incubus swarm as a consequence.”
As Count Cairus’ explanation sank in, my face turned pale.
“All that suffering for so many people… because of my whim in creating a lake?”
“This matter regarding the incubuses is classified as royal secret, since it would be dangerous if it fell into the wrong hands,” Count Cairus continued calmly, though he looked pained as he looked at my pale face.
“Still, I should have informed you beforehand. It was my fault, not yours, Princess.”
I remembered the people screaming as they were chased by the incubus swarm… those devoured…
The thought that it was all my fault nearly made me lose my mind.
Count Cairus’ words offered no comfort whatsoever.
Then, the emperor’s slightly sharp voice startled me awake.
“You wished to assist the migration of those poor people, right? That is a delicate matter, especially now. But the royal head magician has made you a proposal. Try to pursue it.”
But with my mind consumed by guilt, his words barely registered.
As if sensing my reaction, the emperor continued.
“The rogue of the Duchy has already done tremendous work just by that.”
Another rogue remark, I thought. That one word, subtly dismissive, lodged in my mind. For a moment, I wanted to snap at him. That snapped me slightly back to reality.
Looking up at him with questioning eyes, our gazes met, his icy blue stare piercing as if drenching me in a bucket of ice.
Why does he look like he’s upset?
To an outsider, it might seem he was distressed because of me. A ridiculous misperception.
As I scrutinized his faintly sharp smile, I oddly felt a trace of warmth.
When did he say I graduated from being the rogue of the Duchy?
I mocked him inwardly, though I couldn’t voice it—after all, one cannot sneer at the emperor in his presence.
After the audience with the emperor, I was utterly exhausted, both body and mind. Count Cairus used teleportation magic to bring me back to my room.
“Princess, you are never truly alone. There are many who care for you. Please remember that.”
He spoke with a concerned look, anticipating I might blame myself if left alone. Then he vanished, leaving me my solitary time.
I must have looked dangerously frail in my teacher’s eyes, I thought with a bitter smile.
Yet guilt over the slum incident still pressed heavily upon me.
No matter how I rationalized it, I was still the rogue and heir of the Duchy. Ignorance itself was a sin. That incident was ultimately my fault.
I resolved to sleep, seeking an escape from the guilt. Exhaustion from trying to maintain composure before the emperor also weighed heavily.
After a long rest, my mind cleared, and I could think more calmly. There was, as the emperor had said, a way to alleviate some of this guilt.
When I had stood on the teleportation circle in the slums with Mor, he whispered,
“If we combine the power of the White Dragon within Miss Asha with my magic, we might create a shield strong enough to repel the incubus attacks.”
“You think I could help with that?”
“Until now, my magic alone wasn’t sufficient. But together with Miss Asha, it might work.”
I had trusted his words back then, allowing me to return home with some peace. Now, they served as a light in my heart.
I had to act with Mor and prepare for the next incubus attack. That was the best course for now.
Looking outside, the sky had already darkened. I must have slept for a long time.
Suddenly, there was a knock at my door.
Without knowing who it was, I invited them in. It was Dalia, looking at me cautiously.
“Sis, are you feeling unwell?”
“No, why?”
I couldn’t hide my exhaustion.
“You napped for so long. Mersi said it’s unusual for you to do this.”
“I’m just a little tired.”
Dalia, with her childlike large eyes, stared at me for a while before speaking softly.
“Um… can I sleep beside you tonight?”
“Why?”
“I think I might have a scary dream today.”
A lie. In her eyes, there was only worry for me.
“Then why not sleep with Mersi?”
“Tonight I want to sleep with you.”
The little girl crawled into my bed. I let her, feigning helplessness.
“Sis, please hug me tight.”
I halfheartedly draped my arms around her tiny body. Instead, Dalia hugged me tightly. The feeling made tears threaten to spill.
It was unmistakably the child comforting me. How did she know I needed it today?
As I fell asleep beside Dalia, Count Cairus’ words echoed in my ears:
“You are never truly alone…”
For the first time in a while, the shadow in my heart seemed to lift slightly.
