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chapter 29
From that day on, Illei began taking walks in the garden.
Of course, not during the hours when servants or visitors were bustling about—he slipped out only when the estate was quiet.
For example, around five in the afternoon, when the servants were busy preparing dinner.
He sat on a garden bench, bathed in the cool spring breeze and the golden glow of sunset.
It felt strange.
“Is this… really okay?”
Was it alright for things to be so peaceful?
A faint unease, a sense of unfamiliarity, a dazed bewilderment.
Amid those emotions, he gazed at the sunset-lit garden.
It was beautiful.
The flowers blooming in vivid colors for spring, cloaked in golden twilight.
Among the profusion of nameless blue blossoms, the boy’s silver hair swayed gently.
In that moment, his blue eyes—like falling meteors—trembled with emotion.
Rustle—
He heard a faint sound of movement from the nearby bushes.
Illei snapped out of his thoughts and turned toward it sharply.
“……”
“……”
Black hair poked out awkwardly from the shrubs.
He thought seriously to himself:
“Does she actually think she’s hiding?”
Normally, he would have left right away.
He didn’t trust others, and he hated being entangled with anyone.
But for some reason, he didn’t feel that way today.
Perhaps it was the unusually cool breeze.
Or maybe the drowsy golden light of sunset that seemed to soothe his frayed nerves.
Or perhaps…
“The flowers.”
The sweet fragrance carried by the wind.
As Illei stared silently in that direction, the rustling grew louder.
Soon, a black-haired little girl peeked her face out from the bushes.
Illei recognized her at once.
A girl as lovely as the doll she carried everywhere.
This was Lilian Ersione.
When their eyes met, she jumped to her feet.
Her violet-like eyes curved into cheerful crescents.
“Hi, I’m Lilian Ersione!”
The girl trotted over and plopped down just a handspan away from him.
Swinging her legs, she said:
“Do you want to be friends?”
Illei stared at her silently before speaking.
“Why are you saying that to me?”
“Huh?”
“I’m not very useful. You won’t have fun even if you play with me.”
Lilian widened her eyes.
“What kind of roleplay is that?”
“…What?”
“I don’t want to play with you like a toy. I want to play together with you.”
Illei was caught off guard.
“Together…?”
Wasn’t that something people only said to those who were worth something?
When he fell silent, Lilian suddenly leaned close.
Her delicate features filled his view, and he instinctively held his breath.
He had no defenses against this kind of closeness.
As he froze, unsure what to do, Lilian’s eyes sparkled.
“But wow, your eyes are so pretty! They look just like stars—sparkly and bright.”
Did she even realize she herself was shining brighter as she said that?
He felt himself being swept along, yet had no will to resist.
Somehow… the tight, suffocating weight in his chest felt warm and soft instead.
Like her rosy cheeks.
“Strange.”
He still felt uncomfortable, so why wasn’t the “foolish child” inside him lashing out now?
What was this feeling?
While Illei wrestled with confusion, Lilian chattered on about all sorts of things.
About the fried eggs she had for breakfast, how her doll Rose—probably the blonde-haired one—had lost a hairpin, how she planted flowers in pots.
Her topics bounced everywhere.
By the time she mentioned that she was seven years old, Lilian suddenly asked:
“Oh! What’s your name?”
Illei answered automatically:
“You already know.”
“Do I?”
“Didn’t you hear it from the Duchess?”
Lilian tilted her head.
“Why would I hear your name from my mom? I should hear it from you.”
Once again, his words caught in his throat.
Because it was the first time someone’s attention was directed only at him.
And… he couldn’t help craving that attention.
He didn’t know how to respond.
“So? What’s your name?”
Should he run away?
The thought flashed through his mind. A gut feeling told him that if he crossed this line, something would change forever.
“…Why do you keep asking that?”
“Because we can’t be friends unless I know your name!”
“Do we really have to be friends?”
Lilian nodded vigorously, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
“Of course!”
His heart dropped with a heavy thud.
It was fear—
“I want to be friends with you.”
—but maybe also hope.
Heat rushed up the back of his neck. His ears burned.
After a long hesitation, Illei parted his lips softly.
“…Illei.”
“What?”
“My name’s Illei.”
Because he spoke so quietly, Lilian leaned closer, almost pressing against him.
And the instant he said it, Illei regretted it.
“Why did I do that?”
He resolved to pretend she hadn’t heard if Lilian didn’t catch it.
But then—
“I’m Lilian.”
Whispering back just as softly, Lilian’s eyes curved into radiant crescents.
Illei’s eyes widened.
“Nice to meet you, Illei!”
That day, Illei made a friend.
His very first friend.
Becoming Lilian’s friend didn’t turn the world upside down.
But his daily life did change a little.
Knock knock knock!
“Illeeeei! Get uuup! Let’s eat breakfast!”
Startled by the pounding at his door early in the morning, Illei sat up in bed.
What the—?
He had no time to hesitate. The door rattled like it was about to burst open.
So he stumbled out, barely presentable, only for his wrist to be grabbed.
“Wha—hey…?”
“Come on! You have to eat to have energy. That way you can play hard! Kids need that.”
Lilian tugged at his arm.
No one had ever touched him so casually before; his ears burned crimson.
“I’m not a kid.”
“What? But you’re nine, right? Nine is a kid! You have to eat a lot and grow tall.”
And she dragged him to the dining hall.
When they arrived, quite a few people greeted them.
“Oh my, Illei’s here. Welcome! You’ll be eating in the dining hall today?”
“Oh, a new face!”
“Jeril, don’t bounce on your chair.”
Illei was startled to see a crowd of black-haired children—four of them around his age.
They greeted him without hesitation.
He couldn’t ignore it, so he ended up introducing himself… and suddenly, he had four more friends.
“Wait… can friends multiply like this?”
Through the noisy mealtime, Illei could do nothing but eat with a dazed look.
And before he knew it, he had eaten much more than usual.
That wasn’t the end.
“Now it’s time for a warehouse expedition!”
“…Why though?”
In the afternoon, Lilian dragged him off again—this time with a bag stuffed full of “expedition gear.”
On her head, she wore a hat with a glowing magic crystal orb.
He had one too. They were a set.
“Because it’s fun, of course!”
But the warehouse was so big that they got lost.
Illei panicked, but Lilian casually spread out a mat and pulled a huge snack box from her bag.
“Let’s eat!”
“Are we… allowed to?”
“Of course! That’s why I packed it. Food tastes even better when you’re lost!”
“…I don’t think that’s how it works.”
Still, they ate together happily until their bellies were full—and then drowsiness hit.
Both of them dozed off and were eventually discovered by the butler.
And then—
“From now on, you mustn’t ditch the knights and wander off alone together. Understood?”
“…I’m sorry.”
The Duchess scolded them severely.
Not with punishment or blows—just a firm lecture.
When it ended, Illei left her chamber in a daze.
Outside, he met Lilian’s gaze.
“That was fun, huh?”
Seeing her grin so brightly—when she had been sulking in front of the Duchess just moments before—Illei couldn’t help but laugh in disbelief.
“Ah! You laughed, Illei!”
He didn’t know why.
The smile just came.
“Lilian.”
Time flew.
One month, two months, three… and half a year.
The boy named Illei, once wounded and hollowed out by people, had adapted to life in the Ersione estate.
No—he had blended in.
“Why did you want to be friends with me?”
All because of the girl named Lilian.
He stopped blaming himself for everything.
He stopped bristling with thorns and viewing the world askew.
Trust was still another matter—
But at least, he could trust one person.
“Lilian?”
Late one night, the two of them had sneaked up onto the roof, out of the adults’ sight.
If they got caught, they’d be scolded—but as Lilian’s philosophy went: If you don’t get caught, it’s fine.
Tomorrow, Illei would leave this place.
He had only been entrusted here temporarily; he was returning to the Order.
As he gazed up at the sparkling night sky, Illei turned his eyes sideways when no reply came.
“…What is it?”
And he laughed.
