TVOWW 44

Chapter 44

If I Had Been by Your Side Then

The dense forest rippled with black flames.

Amid the pouring rain, the flames burned even more fiercely.

“How much should I show you to gain your trust?”

Johan flicked his fingers lightly. The black flames spreading through the forest exploded, sweeping away the Crollins.

Boom! Bang!

Every place the black fire touched erupted in massive explosions. These were monsters the Empire’s knights would normally take down.

Those Crollins…

Johan was massacring them.

Sensing the noise, I instinctively furrowed my brow, and Johan covered my ears.

“It’ll be over soon.”

The Crollins engulfed in black flames screamed in pain as they rolled on the ground, yet the flames wouldn’t extinguish.

Kraaaaah!

Until nothing remained but ashes.

It was a scene chilling to witness, yet I couldn’t look away. Uneasy, I asked Johan,

“Is it really okay to do this…?”

“What’s so scary?”

Johan shrugged.

“I’m just eliminating everything that could harm you.”

My gaze fell on Johan’s wild aura. His uncontrolled dark magic raged without pause.

“It seems like too much.”

These were the Crollins we’d struggled to catch earlier, and this was a monster-infested forest—it wasn’t easy to use this much power.

“And you haven’t fully recovered yet…”

Back then, he had protective magic. Now, without it, I couldn’t even imagine how much pain he was in.

Johan chuckled softly and draped his coat over my shoulders.

“I’m more worried about you. It’s tattered, but better than leaving you without it.”

One sleeve was missing, and his coat was stained with monster blood, yet Johan’s warmth made it feel comforting.

“Now we can go back together.”

He lifted me into his arms, and I nestled quietly against him.

Black flames blazed in the torrential rain, the forest lay in ruin, the ground cracked, and monsters screamed as they burned.

It feels like the world is about to end.

Only Johan and I remained unharmed.

Johan, seemingly unfazed by the chaos, walked calmly in another direction.

After walking some distance, a group of knights appeared on horseback in the distance. They carried the banners of the Blanchet Duchy.

The Crollin hordes were not the only threat.

Sudden incidents involving monsters were occurring throughout the Blanchet Duchy. Thankfully, the Blanchet Castle itself remained safe, thanks to the family’s excellent preparations, as befitting a house that had endured many trials.

Of course, it also helped that Johan had eliminated the Crollins in one go.

Why do I feel like the Crollins were targeting me?

I couldn’t explain it, yet the thought lingered.

Could it be because I’m a fairy?

• Do fairies have anything to do with monsters?

• Perhaps. If fairies are descendants of the gods, monsters are chaotic beings opposed to them. Maybe that’s why.

• But nothing’s ever happened before.

• True. That’s strange indeed. Even in a monster forest, that shouldn’t happen…

Even the trees didn’t seem to know much about this situation.

• The trees in the monster forest can’t communicate with us. They’ve been too tainted by the corrupted land and lost the blessing of summer.

• The blessing of summer?

• Yes. That’s what they prayed to heal you. They shared the summer blessing they had.

Summer Blessing: the primordial gift the gods granted to the trees.

• But is it okay for them to give me such a precious blessing?

• You worry too much. Sharing it was no problem at all!

• Yes. That blessing was originally a gift from the fairies to the trees. Using it for you made them genuinely happy.

It seemed fairies and trees were close, yet it was hard to get information about fairies from the trees.

• If they were so close, why does no one know the details?

• We don’t know either. Perhaps, as trees, we simply forgot…

• We always knew someone was waiting, but until the moment we met you, we didn’t know who. Seeing you, we realized.

• We’ve been waiting for you all along.

There seems to be some secret.

Lost in thought, Johan nudged me.

“Estelle, ah.”

“Alright, here.”

I fed soup to the injured Johan. He accepted my care quietly, wrapped only in bandages.

It feels like I’m taming a wild beast.

This was how I came to care for Johan. When we arrived, the castle was in turmoil.

“Master, what’s happening?!”
“Bring a doctor immediately! The master—”

Johan, the sole lord of Blanchet, was in serious condition.

Beyond the visible wounds, his internal injuries were severe. Yet Johan insisted,

“Examine Estelle first.”

“…Huh? But Master, your wounds are more serious—”

“Don’t you hear my command?”

Thanks to Johan’s efforts, I remained unharmed. The doctor first examined me to ensure I hadn’t caught a cold from the rain before treating Johan.

“Master, even for you, you need at least two to three days of rest.”
“Yes, though I’m sure the master will manage. That’s my professional opinion.”

Yet no one dared to argue with him. Johan was a fearsome master. I cautiously stepped forward.

“May I care for Johan? It doesn’t seem to require advanced skills.”
“The lady? Then we’d be very grateful.”

Fortunately, Johan welcomed my nursing.

I’m glad Estelle is taking care of me. We can also spend time together.

Thus, I attended to his meals and bedroom needs, though the castle staff had already prepared everything.

Come to think of it, the Blanchet staff is surprisingly warm.

I had assumed they’d dislike me for being close to Johan, but I sensed no ill will—only hospitality.

Was this Johan’s doing too?

I asked Johan, having calmed the chaos a bit:

“Any pain?”

“Some discomfort at the wound site.”

“Does it hurt? I’ll check.”

I bent over to inspect him. Johan suddenly pulled me onto the bed and pressed himself against me, brushing his nose along my neck.

“I was uncomfortable without you by my side.”

“What? You were right in front of me feeding me.”

“It’s different holding you.”

Johan wore no shirt over the bandages on his upper body. His strong muscles were distinct beneath.

I tried to squirm away, but he chuckled, “Where are you going?” and didn’t let me go.

“Going to sleep like this?”
“It’s already evening anyway.”

The firm muscles, the subtle movement of his lips by my ear, his faint but heavy scent.

“Shall we sleep like this?”

His sweet voice tickled my ear. My cheeks flushed, but I tried not to show it.

I’m always swayed when I’m with Johan.

Honestly, I never thought I’d be easily influenced, yet here I was.

“Alright. Then let’s sleep.”

I turned to face Johan, our eyes meeting. Sharing a pillow, breathing close, lying down facing each other felt peculiar.

Johan whispered softly:

“But I can’t sleep. Tell me a story.”

“My story?”
“Anything. Whatever’s easy.”

I couldn’t share much about Liberthan. Only one thing I could tell:

“No matter what, it won’t be fun.”

Lavianne Orphanage.

I wasn’t sure if noble Johan would enjoy tales of my commoner past.

He pulled me onto the bed, holding me and gently patting my shoulder.

“Still, tell me. I want to know about you.”

“At the orphanage, dozens of us lived together. There were so many kids; it was chaotic.”

Abandoned children overflowed in every era. I, too, was one of them—an unknown, forsaken child.

No one knew why I ended up there—not even the headmaster or teachers. Too many children were abandoned or ran away.

“I was the smallest and weakest. The headmaster intended to discard me but forgot, maybe because I was too small or too foolish.”

“Probably because you were foolish.”
“Right? I wasn’t smart. When angry, he’d vent on the kids. Once, I was beaten almost to death…”

A flash of anger crossed Johan’s red eyes.

“Tell me exactly what that bastard did.”
“It’s all past. I don’t care anymore.”

I wasn’t protecting the headmaster because I was angelic—it was simply too long ago.

“Small kids were targets. Many boys and girls at the orphanage tormented me too.”

Looking back, I had been disliked in many places.

“Estelle.”

Johan’s elegant fingers gently brushed my cheek.

“Shall I take revenge?”

“Huh?”
“Those who tormented you as a child—I’ll find them one by one and avenge you.”

He was quietly angry. I shook my head, refusing.

“Don’t be mad.”

“I’m not angry at you. I’m angry at those who tormented you.”

I barely remembered how I had been bullied. The orphanage was harsh; children had to bite and claw at each other to survive.

So, I didn’t feel the need for revenge.

“I’m fine now. Johan is beside me.”

Johan sighed softly, drawing me closer. His entire body enveloped me.

“I wish I had been by your side then.”

“Then I could have protected you.”

“Would we have?”

If I hadn’t been adopted into Liberthan and met Johan then, we wouldn’t have met like this. No betrayal, no fear—just reality as it was. Thinking about it chilled me. Reality wouldn’t change.

I became an orphan in Liberthan, he rose as Liberthan’s avenger.

I laughed softly, clasping my hands.

“Could we have been a couple even then?”

“Of course. I would have found you and married you.”

Yet Johan never revealed the truth, nor did I share my secret. We were each seeing an illusion. Even if this warmth and affection might one day vanish, it was enough.

Beg me to save you!

Then you seemed real.

If you beg me in tears, I’ll grant it all.

I was fake. I’d never experienced the real.

Yet if someone truly loved me, I imagined they’d look at me just like that.

Johan kissed my cheek after seeing my smile.

“Estelle, what are you thinking?”
“The other version of us you just told me about.”

Even after so much betrayal, I wanted to trust Johan. But I couldn’t fully abandon precautions. I trusted him while staying prepared.

“I’d be happy if Johan found me like that.”

I nestled into his firm embrace, focusing only on the comfort of his warmth.

Estelle fell asleep like that. Johan brushed her sleeping back.

She sleeps so peacefully.

Truly a lovely girl, like a rabbit. Even when alert, she would soon open her eyes wide and follow him.

I wonder what mischief she expects from me.

A smile unknowingly curved his lips. A memory of Liberthan’s tradition crossed his mind.

She probably hasn’t heard of protective magic before.

Understandable for a magic novice, though Liberthan would have known.

Generations had passed down protective magic. Johan infused a bit of his magic, carefully lifting Estelle’s collar to breathe magic beneath her collarbone—a place Liberthan descendants used for protective inscriptions.

Nothing stirred from her. But there, faintly beneath, a scar resembling a cut appeared.