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Chapter 20
Seventeen years ago.
The summer heat was sweltering. Just standing still made sweat trickle down your back.
Whirr, whirr.
An old fan rattled noisily in the corner of the living room. Its racket mixed with the offbeat sound of someone snoring.
“Ugh. So loud.”
Yujin, sitting in the corner with her picture diary, scrunched up her face and covered her ears. Her gaze shifted toward the source of the noise.
Hrrngh. Hrrrgh.
The snoring of her older brother, Lim Yuhyun, was practically tank-level loud. Next to him, sprawled across the floor, lay his friends. They’d finished their exams that morning and gone home early, only to collapse into sleep here. Four tall, broad-shouldered boys filled the narrow living room, leaving not even a foot of space to spare.
“Hmm… where’s pink?”
Her eyes swept over the colored pencils laid out in front of her. She needed pink for the skirt she was coloring, but it was nowhere in sight.
“I’m sure I saw it yesterday…”
She rummaged through the cup for a long while, but no luck.
“Ah.”
Her face suddenly brightened.
“That’s right!”
She’d left it on top of the piano that morning. Yujin’s head snapped toward it. Sure enough, the pink pencil was sitting right in front of the sheet music.
But the problem was obvious. To get there, she’d have to cross over four giant boys.
“Why are they even sleeping here? They’re blocking the whole way.”
Yujin sighed, then rose to her feet. She mentally ran through a simulation of how to get across.
“Should I just wake them up…?”
She poked the air with her finger, tracing possible footholds. The space was so cramped it felt impossible. In the end, she clenched her fists.
Well, no helping it. Even if I trip, I’ll just have to deal with it.
Taking a deep breath, she tiptoed forward.
“Ah—ahh!”
She wobbled, arms flailing, but somehow managed to stay upright. A heavy sigh of relief escaped her lips.
“That was close.”
One careful step, then another. She teetered, almost falling, almost not, inching her way forward. By the time she reached the middle of the living room, her forehead was beaded with sweat.
“Just a little more…”
Only three steps to go. Yujin checked her final path, lifted her foot, and began to step down.
And then—
“Ahhh!”
She slipped and landed—hard—right where she hadn’t meant to.
A piercing yell shook the living room, and the boys jolted awake.
“What the—?!”
“What’s going on?!”
“Ugh, damn—”
Yujin, pale as a sheet, realized she had fallen straight onto Heejae.
“Hey, Kang Heejae! What’s wrong with you? Are you hurt?”
Heejae was doubled over, both hands clamped over the front of his pants. His body shook as he groaned through clenched teeth.
Yujin’s breath caught in her throat. No… no, did I just—?!
Trembling, she grabbed Yuhyun’s arm.
“Oppa—what do I do? What do we do about Heejae Oppa?”
“Yujin! Was this you?!”
“I—I didn’t mean to, I just—”
Yuhyun, alarm flashing across his face, crouched down beside his friend.
The commotion drew their mother, Nam Sunshim, running from the kitchen with a ladle still in her hand.
“What on earth is happening in here?!”
“Ahh—hngh—”
Heejae couldn’t even open his eyes, just kept moaning in pain.
“I didn’t know, I didn’t mean to—Oppa, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry—”
Her panic broke into sobs.
Sunshim, now frantic, grabbed the phone.
“This is 119? Please, hurry! A boy is badly hurt!”
Yuhyun and his friends hovered helplessly, patting Heejae’s back, trying to ease him. Within minutes, paramedics rushed in. Yujin bolted for her room, her face streaked with tears.
Her brother’s best friend. Her first love. And she had just stepped on him—right there.
That night, Yuhyun returned from the hospital.
“Is Heejae okay? What did they say?” their mother asked, voice tight with worry.
Yujin lay under a blanket on the living room floor, eyes squeezed shut but ears straining. Normally she was asleep by eight, but now, even close to nine, she couldn’t rest.
“They did some tests,” Yuhyun said carefully. “We’ll have to wait and see.”
“Oh, heaven help us…”
The words made Yujin’s stomach twist. Her hand clenched the blanket tighter.
What if he’s really hurt because of me?
Her heart pounded, fear swelling until it brought tears to her eyes.
“I should call his mother,” Sunshim murmured. “This is serious.”
“Don’t worry too much,” Yuhyun tried.
“How can I not? For now, you’re going to the hospital with him. And when you see his mother, give her my number.”
Yujin’s palms grew damp with sweat. She replayed the accident in her head. She hadn’t meant to step there. If only she’d chosen another color. If only she hadn’t tried to cross.
It was just supposed to be for pink. Just for pink…
Even with her eyes shut, hot tears slid down her cheeks.
She didn’t know what she would say the next time she saw him. He had always been her crush. Now she was the reason he was in pain.
Hiding her face in the blanket, Yujin cried as quietly as she could.
Several days later.
“Mom, we’re here.”
“Good evening, Auntie.”
Yujin froze. His voice—Heejae’s voice—was at the door. She pressed her ear against her bedroom wall.
“Heejae, welcome. Are you feeling better?”
“Yes, I’m fine now.”
“I’m so sorry, dear. Let this ajumma apologize on her daughter’s behalf.”
“I’m really okay.”
Hearing him laugh softly, Yujin’s heart unclenched a little. The gnawing fear of the past days eased.
But her brother’s words still echoed in her mind:
‘Because of you, Heejae’s ruined now.’
She’d cried endlessly whenever Yuhyun teased her, even warning her that something terrible might happen to the handsome boy she liked so much.
“Yujin! Come out and eat with us,” their mother called.
“I’ll go get her,” Heejae offered.
Yujin gasped. She scrambled back to her desk just as the door opened.
“Yujin.”
Her breath caught. Tears welled instantly when she saw him standing there.
“Oh… Oppa.”
He smiled faintly.
“Why are you crying? I told you, I’m fine.”
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…”
“I said it’s okay.”
But the more he reassured her, the harder she cried. Sighing, Heejae grabbed a box of tissues and gently wiped her face.
His kindness only made it worse. Yujin’s sobs broke loose, raw and uncontrollable, while he stood there patiently, soothing her until she could finally calm down.
