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Chapter 18
“W-When did you get here?”
I reflexively took a step toward the Duke but staggered in place.
My legs still lacked strength, and my ankle twisted under me.
“Ahh…!!”
Without time to react, my body tilted to one side.
At that moment, the Duke rushed over and grabbed my shoulder.
Startled, I opened and closed my mouth in shock.
When I looked up, I saw him staring down at me with a hardened expression.
“I-I’m okay!”
Coming to my senses, I quickly stepped back and raised my hands to show I was fine.
But he didn’t let go of my arm. Instead, he let out a deep sigh and gently guided me to the bed and sat me down.
“You’ve been bedridden for three months. If you move so suddenly like that…”
The Duke furrowed his brows slightly, then stopped mid-sentence and murmured under his breath.
“…It’s fine. I saw that you’re okay.”
Then, without hesitation, he turned toward the door. I quickly called out to him.
“W-Were you worried?”
He paused mid-step and turned to look at me.
His face was unreadable. I started to babble nervously.
“Ah, um, Walter was here earlier. He said Father appointed a new personal physician for me…”
“…”
“He said you brought him yourself because he was highly skilled… that’s what Walter told me. And that person… Ah, no, that’s not what I meant to say. I’m sorry.”
I awkwardly looked away, fumbling my words.
“Um… actually, before I collapsed—when Meyer did something strange to me—I really thought I was going to die.”
“…”
“What I mean is… I’m just really grateful you came to save me…”
My words trailed off slowly. Just before silence took over the room, I quickly added,
“…But I really didn’t know! I had no idea he would do something like that, I just—!”
“I know everything.”
The Duke interrupted me in a cold voice. I snapped my mouth shut.
He stood completely still, staring at me with stern eyes.
Meeting his chilling gaze made my throat tighten.
‘This is bad.’
Honestly, I had been feeling anxious for a while now.
‘I should’ve just kept quiet, but I caused a huge mess instead.’
When I overheard that strange conversation at the mansion—or when I began to suspect Meyer.
I should’ve just confessed everything right then.
The Duke is intelligent and strong. Maybe everything would’ve been solved easily if I had just told him.
“I-I’m sorry!”
I shut my eyes tightly and cried out.
Even if we didn’t get along, he was still the master of this mansion—and my father.
Yet I hadn’t told him anything about this massive incident.
As a result, something terrible had happened in the mansion, and I fell into a deep sleep without doing anything to fix it.
‘…What a nuisance I am.’
My face burned with shame.
On top of that—
When I opened my eyes, it hadn’t been three days or even three weeks, but a full three months. And somehow, I wasn’t in the capital but back in the duchy’s territory.
‘There must’ve been conflict with the temple.’
I bit my lip.
The sudden change in environment, the overwhelming happiness—I had stupidly forgotten for a moment.
That Duke Tigris was one of the Four Grand Dukes who supported the entire nation.
That he constantly walked on a political tightrope.
‘What do I do?’
If he had been sent to the territory in disgrace because of me…
My face turned pale, and I bowed my head deeply. But that wasn’t the only issue.
What to do about Meyer was also a huge problem.
Meyer had committed a heinous crime against me, the Duke’s daughter. If he wasn’t punished, the Duke’s authority would be trampled.
But if he was punished…
‘We’d completely sever ties with the temple.’
The Frater Temple was powerful. And recently, it had even earned the trust of the mighty Empress Grace.
According to Meyer, it might even become the state religion soon.
If they turned against the family in retaliation, it would only be a matter of time before serious consequences followed.
My mind turned cold.
‘Just a few days ago, I promised myself I’d behave from now on.’
Since waking up, I’d been agonizing over how to deal with all this. But I couldn’t find an answer.
And now, finally face-to-face with the Duke, only one thought echoed in my head:
‘I’ve become a complete burden to the family.’
I should’ve just behaved. What did I think I could accomplish on my own?
In the end, I collapsed without doing anything and put the whole family in a difficult position.
Shaking with anxiety, I finally opened my mouth in a trembling voice.
“I… I was wrong. I should’ve told you beforehand. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”
“…”
The Duke said nothing, and I blinked anxiously.
“B-But I really didn’t expect him to attack me like that…”
The Duke simply looked down at me in silence. Something boiled up inside me.
We weren’t that close, but honestly, I was glad he was here.
In my past life, I never even saw my parents’ faces. In this life, having them around was strange but comforting.
‘Sometimes… he really felt like a parent.’
Though it wasn’t often, I felt it whenever we shared a meal.
That he tried to match my pace.
Even when I went to tell Ansen I’d secured a vacation, I remembered what he said:
“Two days off? His Grace gave me a fixed day off. And you know what else he creepily said?”
“What?”
“He told me to eat well and sleep well while I work. Said someone was concerned. Who could possibly be concerned about me?”
Honestly, hearing that made me happy.
I think I even got my hopes up.
That’s why I didn’t want to be a burden.
I just wanted to be quiet and obedient, like I told him before—a good daughter.
When I said I was afraid of being kicked out, I wasn’t lying.
I had seen many parents abandon their children. It happened to me. And it happened to many kids in the orphanage.
Even if it was due to brainwashing, the Duke and Selenea had hated each other for a long time.
I still remembered what I heard on Estelline’s birthday, the day I first woke up here:
“Isn’t she the black sheep of the Tigris family?”
And now this mess again.
Even birth parents abandon their children. Who would love a troublemaker of a daughter who was already estranged?
Especially someone as cold and rational as the Duke.
‘…This was a chance.’
A chance to become part of a family.
I knew from experience what happened when I dared to want more than I deserved.
Unaware my lips had turned pale from biting down so hard, I trembled.
“The temple… no, I mean Meyer…”
My mouth kept spouting nonsense.
But then, the Duke took a step toward me. I reflexively flinched.
But when I cautiously looked up, I saw not anger, but a strange expression on his face.
His tightly closed lips slowly parted.
“…From earlier.”
“…”
“What are you sorry for?”
His jaw was tense. I looked up at him, confused.
“Why do you keep saying that…?”
At that moment, the Duke’s voice trembled slightly. I stared at him in worry.
I could see a complicated expression, like he was suppressing deep emotion.
“If you’re wondering about Meyer… he’s barely alive right now.”
“What…?”
“He’s in the underground prison beneath the duchy.”
My eyes widened. So he had tortured Meyer to demonstrate the family’s power.
Then surely, the relationship with the temple was broken now. The family must’ve suffered a loss. If he was exiled from the capital because of that…
“S-So it’s because of me… I’m really sorry, truly—”
“Stop.”
His sudden voice made me fall silent.
“Please… just stop saying you’re sorry.”
The next moment, I looked at him and froze in place.
The Duke’s expression had completely collapsed.
“Selenea. You’re blaming me, aren’t you?”
Not understanding what he meant, I blinked in confusion.
“Huh?”
“…Yes. I couldn’t protect Hemera. And now, I let you get hurt too. Of course you resent me.”
Letting out a long breath, he covered his face with one hand and slowly bowed his head.
A silence like eternity followed. Then his broad, stiff shoulders began to tremble weakly.
I stared at him, stunned.
“That day… not being able to protect Hemera…”
“…”
“If I could, I wanted to die. I thought about it over and over. But…”
The face that was always cold and composed—it had all been a mask.
“Hemera visits me every night in my dreams…”
His voice trailed off painfully, and he slowly sank to the floor. Now I could see his face clearly.
Tears were flowing endlessly from the Duke’s crimson eyes—eyes I had once found terrifying.
“…Father.”
I spoke reflexively. Even the word ‘father’ felt unfamiliar on my lips.
But—
“Selenea, please. If you hate me, then curse me, push me away. But that word… please don’t say it.”
“…”
“When you say you’re sorry, I just can’t bear it anymore.”
“N-No. I don’t hate you.”
Still dazed, I mumbled instinctively.
Even though I wasn’t the real Selenea, looking into the Duke’s eyes made my lips move on their own.
“I didn’t say that out of hate or blame… really.”
His eyes wavered. I kept talking, as if under a spell.
“It was something that couldn’t be helped. Not everything goes the way we want…”
“Please don’t cry…”
