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chapter 12…
It felt like her arms and legs were stiff from tension. Just coming this far was enough to start rumors if anyone wanted to spread them.
She had the excuse of an assignment, so she could come up with something if she had to. But rumors didn’t need to be true to spread—and rumors about someone as famous as Damian Krasnov would spread even faster.
Luckily, it was dinner time, so the dormitory hallway was empty. If they had been working on the assignment in the dorm from the beginning… Ugh. She didn’t even want to think about it.
After a long chain of anxious thoughts, the two of them stopped in front of a door that looked like it belonged to a professor’s office. Afraid her school uniform might show, Tislin pulled Damian’s coat tighter around herself.
“What is this place?”
“The Royal Guard Knights’ lounge.”
“Is it okay for outsiders to come in?”
Even as she asked, Tislin followed Damian inside. Going anywhere was safer than standing out in that hallway.
Inside, it looked like the sitting room of an ordinary noble mansion. In the early morning, sunlight would probably pour in and make the gold threads on the sofa shine. It was a bright, elegant room—nothing like the stiff atmosphere of the Knights Department dormitory.
“No one uses it anyway. It was originally made for students affiliated with the Knights, but since there’s already a dorm lounge, no one comes all the way here.”
He added that the neighboring rooms were similar lounges, so there was no need to worry about people coming and going.
“I didn’t know a place like this existed…”
Being in a familiar-looking room helped her relax a little—except for the fact that the table was small, so the seat across from her felt too close. Tislin sank into the soft chair and placed her hands on her lap.
Damian went into the inner room and returned with a steaming mug.
“Huh?”
“It’s something you like. Isn’t it?”
It was rich hot chocolate. Tislin nodded blankly.
The Grand Duchy of Luxen was much farther north than the territory of Ermis. When she visited Luxen in winter, she used to wrap herself in blankets and constantly drink warm milk and hot chocolate to fight the cold.
Adelinde, who always wanted to copy whatever Tislin did, had insisted on drinking chocolate too. She ended up with cavities and had to avoid it for a while, but once she recovered, she went right back to it.
Tislin had made it for Damian a few times as well, but she hadn’t thought he would remember.
“That’s right! I haven’t had this in a while.”
It tasted exactly like the one she used to drink in Luxen.
But why was it in the Royal Guard lounge? Even when he was in Luxen, Damian hadn’t liked sweet drinks like chocolate. Could it be…
No.
Tislin firmly cut off the branch of imagination growing in her mind.
It must be a coincidence. Or just simple kindness. It couldn’t be anything more.
“Thank you.”
She lowered her gaze to the chocolate.
Damian had brought plain tea for himself. It was the same kind he used to drink in Luxen. There were probably better teas in the capital, but people tended to reach for what was familiar.
In truth, their engagement was probably similar. A familiar person was comfortable. Someone close to Adelinde was preferable. At least he was someone she could trust.
And now… well, maybe breaking an already arranged engagement would just be troublesome?
But for something this important, could that really be the reason?
“I don’t understand.”
Tislin muttered while staring at her cup.
“So I must have fit some condition of yours or His Grace’s. But I’m not the only person who meets those conditions, am I?”
Damian didn’t answer. That was answer enough.
See? Tislin gave a bitter smile.
“Then why won’t you break off the engagement?”
“Tis. Even if I withdraw my intention to marry you, the engagement won’t be canceled immediately.”
That made no sense. Her parents had accepted the engagement without even asking her opinion, but there was no way the Grand Duke of Luxen would force Damian into an engagement against his will.
“As you think, my opinion was asked when the engagement was decided. But canceling it requires more than that. It’s already been set.”
“You mean a political reason.”
But there couldn’t be such a thing between the Count of Ermis and the Grand Duchy of Luxen. In simple terms, the two families had no political ties at all.
“Yes. Whatever it is, there has to be a proper reason that makes it impossible to continue the engagement.”
Tislin blinked blankly. Damian emphasized again,
“Even if, by some chance, I agreed with your desire to break it off, I have no intention of actively participating in creating such a reason.”
That was firmer and more definite than simply refusing to break it off.
She couldn’t understand at all.
She had truly believed that if she just asked him to cancel the engagement, he would agree. It hadn’t even been publicly announced yet. Couldn’t they just end it by mutual agreement?
But now Damian was saying there would be no cancellation without a proper justification.
‘It’s not like you even like me!’
Anger suddenly surged to the top of her head. Tislin shot to her feet and glared at him.
“Y-you—so you’re really going to marry me?”
“Yes. I am.”
The answer came without a single moment of hesitation, leaving her speechless.
“You…!”
“Why? Is that not allowed?”
When their eyes met, Tislin flinched. His smooth and elegant face showed no sign of agitation, but there was heat in his blue eyes. She couldn’t understand it.
The anger that had flared up quickly sank back down. She squeezed her eyes shut and practically collapsed back into her seat.
What on earth was she doing?
“Why me in the first place? There were other people. His Grace even arranged introductions, didn’t he?”
She had heard that he had rejected all those well-qualified young ladies, but that wasn’t important right now.
“You chose me? Why?”
“Well…”
Damian lowered his eyes as if choosing his words. After a short silence, he answered.
“Our eyes met often.”
For something she had been so curious about, the answer felt absurdly empty. The strength drained from her body.
‘That’s it?’
It was no different from saying he had picked just anyone. And that couldn’t possibly be the real reason.
“I didn’t know you would hate it this much.”
Of course he wouldn’t. Right before he chose her as his fiancée, she had confessed to him!
‘But if you remembered that, shouldn’t you also remember that you rejected me on the spot?’
Was he making fun of her?
At the start of the conversation, she had so many things she wanted to ask. But after going in circles and hearing only “no,” her motivation had drained away. For a fleeting moment, she even thought it might be better to live with someone she truly liked than be forced to live with some stubborn man like him.
Even though she shouldn’t think that way.
“So, Tis. Why do you hate the engagement?”
The question pierced straight through her wandering thoughts. She almost answered without thinking. Tislin stammered, then narrowed her eyes and firmly shut her mouth.
If this turned into an interrogation, Damian would obviously have the upper hand. But this wasn’t a prisoner’s interrogation. Gripping the hem of her skirt tightly, she turned her head away.
“I can’t say. …It’s an embarrassing reason.”
She meant it.
To her, it was the most important issue in her life—but to others, it would probably sound trivial.
The moment she said it aloud, she would be belittling herself. Especially to someone she liked, she could never say it.
Things like that truly existed in the world. Even if Damian Krasnov didn’t know it.
Damian stared at her as if trying to judge whether she was telling the truth. It felt as though his gaze had weight, brushing against her cheek. She turned her head away. Her face grew hot again.
After slowly looking over her wandering eyes, flushed cheeks, and reddened ears, Damian’s lips curved slightly.
“Fine. If that’s the case, then I’ll tell you another reason why we can’t break off the engagement.”
Another reason?
With those words, Damian held out an envelope. Without thinking, Tislin took it—and almost screamed.
The sender’s name, clearly written on the envelope.
“Adelinde.”
Her vision went dark.
With trembling hands, Tislin opened the envelope and checked the end of the short letter. Just as she thought.
“She’s on her way here…!”
