TYDSU 06

Chapter 6

I Thought the Youngest Daughter of the Sichuan Tang Family Was Hated

After leaving the Hallucination Grass with Tang Rim, I spent several days focusing on recovery.

I aired out the room often and constantly checked the incense burner to extinguish it.

The poison already accumulated in my body was detoxified using restorative herbal medicine sent by the Medicine Hall Master.

The very tonic everyone said I hadn’t touched lately.

As expected, it contained a weak antidote intended for someone like me living in the Tang Family without poison resistance.

The effects were faint though. If I’d continued burning the Hallucination Grass while drinking it, detoxification would’ve been impossible.

Anyway, after four days, my head felt much clearer.

“Haa…”

I leaned out the window and took a deep breath.

“……”

Unlike my much healthier condition, my mood refused to improve.

Tang Rim’s strange behavior that day and Gyogyo’s sparkling hairpin kept circling in my head.

I looked inside the pouch Tang Rim had given me. The sweets inside glittered brightly under the sunlight.

I stared blankly before popping one into my mouth and chewing slowly.

“It’s sweet…”

Tang Rim seemed to care about me far more than I’d expected, while Gyogyo was even worse than I remembered.

The cruel things my brothers supposedly said to me had all been fabricated by Gyogyo.

For a moment, I almost let myself feel hope, but I quickly steadied my heart.

Still, nothing has changed.

I chewed the candy harshly for no reason.

I shouldn’t recklessly expect affection. I’d always be the one left disappointed.

When my dantian was destroyed and six-year-old me had fallen into despair, did I really want sweet candy or expensive gifts?

I didn’t need sweet candy or expensive gifts.

I just wanted my family.

I used to wait every day, hoping at least one person would come visit me while I trembled without even the courage to leave my room…

But no one came.

After waiting more than a year, the only thing I received was poisoned medicine.

That wasn’t the Hallucination Grass’s fault.

I clenched the pouch so tightly my fingertips went numb.

There’s no way they cherish me. If they did, why didn’t they ever even once—

My vision blurred.

“…Enough. This isn’t the time for this.”

I quickly wiped away my tears with my palms.

Right now, I had something I needed to do: catch the person who harmed me.

I couldn’t afford to get distracted.

“Yeah. I can’t do this.”

“What can’t you do?”

“Wah?!”

That startled me!

“B-Brother!”

Tang Rim suddenly poked his head out from behind me, having entered without making a sound.

“There’s nothing there though?”

Looking out toward the rear garden beyond the window, he tilted his head.

“N-Nothing! I didn’t say anything!”

“Hmmm.”

Tang Rim shrugged and looked away.

While he was distracted, I hurriedly wiped my face clean to hide the traces of crying. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to notice.

“Ahem. Nothing strange happened, right?”

With his hands behind his back, Tang Rim wandered around the room as he asked.

“N-No….”

I answered while calming my startled heart.

It had been four days since he took the Hallucination Grass, and now Tang Rim suddenly appeared in my room.

Did he find something out?

I stared fixedly at his back as he traced the dust on the table with his fingertips.

Feeling my gaze, he slowly turned around and strode toward me.

“……”

Lifting his chin, Tang Rim moved his lips awkwardly.

“I brought something you’ll probably like.”

“!”

As expected.

He found out about the Hallucination Grass.

It took him four days, so he’d probably uncovered everything. With the Tang Family’s information network, something like this would be easy.

“Here.”

Tang Rim suddenly thrust something toward me as my eyes sparkled expectantly.

“Thank you—! Huh…?”

It wasn’t a ledger from the Central Plains Guild or evidence of Hallucination Grass transactions.

“…It’s a doll.”

A wooden doll.

An unbelievably ugly one at that.

Three nostrils, one eye, four ears.

What’s the meaning behind showing me this?

Was he bragging? Like it was the ugliest doll in Sichuan?

As I blankly accepted the doll, Tang Rim nodded proudly.

“Carry it around well. It’s this brother’s clone.”

Ah.

Only then did I realize what this doll actually was.

A gift. Tang Rim had given me a gift.

“……”

Only now did I notice the rough surface. He had clearly made it himself.

Suddenly, my throat stung, and I tightly shut my mouth.

My heart swelled while aching at the same time.

After avoiding me for an entire year…?

What sudden change of heart was this?

Just as bitterness welled up inside me, Tang Rim’s hand landed on top of my head.

“!”

Startled, I squeezed my eyes shut.

“Hah. You startled that easily? Who’s going to hit you?”

I heard Tang Rim let out a hollow laugh.

When I slowly opened my eyes, I saw a jade hairpin.

“Brother… this?”

I held out both hands to receive it, and Tang Rim awkwardly turned his head away.

“It’s a hairpin. Can’t you tell just by looking?”

“……”

The hairpin gleamed smoothly, light enough for even me to hold with one hand.

The little engraved leaves decorating it looked especially cute.

“What? You don’t like it?”

When I stayed silent, Tang Rim tilted his head.

I quickly shook my head.

“Mmm. I like it.”

At that, Tang Rim grinned brightly.

“Really? Then I’ll bring you another tomorrow. The day after too, and the day after that!”

My heart suddenly dropped.

A warmth I’d forgotten spread deeply through me.

So this is what it felt like to be loved.

The feeling I’d longed for desperately.

That cruel feeling you couldn’t obtain just because you wanted it.

The restless emotions swirling inside me began bubbling over.

Then, like an overinflated bubble suddenly bursting—

“…Then, how long will you keep coming?”

“Huh?”

“Will you really come tomorrow and the day after too?”

At my sudden question, Tang Rim blinked.

He looked like he thought he’d misheard me.

I wanted to brush it off like it meant nothing.

“Then when will you stop coming?”

But the words kept spilling out.

It felt like I absolutely had to ask.

“…Why? Do you not want me to come?”

Tang Rim’s face suddenly turned serious.

I could see his eyes trembling.

“No. I like it.”

I shook my head firmly again.

My lips kept trying to pout, so I lowered my head deeply.

“Then if you like it, that’s enough….”

“Mhm. But I’m not allowed to do that.”

I fidgeted with the rough edge of the wooden doll.

For some reason, I couldn’t look directly at Tang Rim’s face.

“I can’t get used to it. I don’t know how long you’ll come. If you tell me exactly until when, I’ll only wait until then. Starting the next day, I won’t wait anymore.”

Old memories kept surfacing.

Someday Brother will come see me again like before.

Those were the days I spent hoping.

“Because otherwise… it gets too lonely….”

But even after ten nights passed, then a hundred nights—

Tang Rim never came.

“……”

An awkward silence filled the room.

I didn’t have the courage to look at Tang Rim’s face, so I just nudged the floor with my toes.

Right when regret over my unnecessary words began creeping in, Tang Rim stepped toward me.

Then he knelt on one knee and met my eyes.

“…Were you waiting for me all this time?”

Tang Rim’s face had gone pale.

As if he’d only just realized it now.

My eyes stung.

I slowly nodded, and Tang Rim spoke in a stiff voice.

“I just… didn’t want to show my face until you forgave me.”

Forgive?

I blinked.

Had Tang Rim done something wrong to me before?

No matter how I searched my memories, nothing came to mind.

“But then you greeted me first, so I thought you’d forgiven me—”

“Why would I… forgive you?”

It was a simple question.

Not meant to attack him at all—just pure confusion.

Yet Tang Rim began moving his lips as though I’d stabbed directly into one of his wounds.

“N-No. I’m not asking for forgiveness… ngh.”

Tang Rim lowered his head deeply and bit his lip.

“You never have to forgive me for the rest of your life, but I just…!”

His trembling voice made it sound like he was holding back tears.

“I was scared you’d hate me. Because of me… your dantian….”

A large tear rolled down Tang Rim’s cheek and dropped.

My dantian?

How exactly had I lost my dantian a year ago?

Honestly, I couldn’t remember at all.

The pain had probably been so overwhelming that I forgot everything.

I was probably practicing cultivation techniques.

But even within those hazy memories, one thing was certain.

Tang Rim had been standing guard beside me that day.

I’d been vulnerable to outside interference, and Tang Rim had been protecting me.

But that was all.

No one had been able to save me then. So how could I blame only Tang Rim?

“I should’ve protected you. Because I’m your brother!”

Tang Rim believed it was entirely his fault.

Even though he’d only been ten years old at the time.

“I’m sorry. I was… scared you’d hate me… ngh.”

He bit his lip hard to hold back his tears.

So hard that blood appeared on his lower lip.

Then when we first met after I returned… that reaction was because…?

I’d thought he looked frightened because he was startled and couldn’t meet my eyes.

And that really had been true.

He was afraid I resented him.

“I’ll come every day. I’ll come without missing a single day, so don’t hate me. Okay?”

Holding my hands carefully in both of his, Tang Rim lowered his head while his shoulders trembled.

“I— sniff— I really like you so much…!”

The dazed feeling in my head cleared as though I’d been struck.

Only the warmth of his hands remained.

My chest overflowed.

Tang Rim… so that means… he…

The tangled mess inside my mind slowly became clear.

Ever since I ran away from the family until now, it had always felt like something inside me was empty.

Like something precious had been stolen.

No matter where I belonged, nowhere had ever felt like home.

That massive emptiness called family that had hollowed me out.

Now that place…

I wasn’t hated after all.

…was finally being filled.

My vision blurred, and my throat tightened painfully.

“…Brother.”

Holding back my surging emotions, I knelt down in front of him and bowed even deeper than he had.

That made me fall straight into Tang Rim’s arms.

I wrapped my arms around his waist.

“I missed you so, so much.”

“…!”

Tang Rim flinched for a moment before suddenly pulling me tightly into his embrace.

“I missed you too… so much…!”

The tears falling onto my shoulder made it damp.

He smelled nice.

Cool and clean.

The scent of poison I hadn’t smelled this closely in a very long time.

To some people, it might have been frightening, but…

“Sniff… my little sister….”

I still liked it.

Because he was my brother.