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Chapter 02
“Please do not let anyone in. Not Father, not Mother, not Jonas. They must not come there. Send someone who doesn’t know me to serve me. If they ask who I am, say I’m a sinner who committed a grave crime.”
“Must you really go that far…?”
“I no longer exist. Farewell.”
Isaac stared blankly at the ceiling.
He tried to empty his mind and meditate, but it didn’t go as intended.
His last conversation with his father resurfaced.
Though it had been 20 years, it felt vivid, like it had happened yesterday.
He still remembered exactly what they had said to each other, not a single word out of place.
In that moment, silence said more than words, and the heavy air weighed more than any speech.
Isaac didn’t want to appear weak.
He didn’t want to hurt the ones he loved anymore.
He didn’t want to lose them.
That was why he resolved never to see his loved ones again.
After that, he shut himself away and devoted himself solely to the study of magic.
He focused only on breaking free from the fate assigned to him.
That was his form of penance and his way of forgetting the pain.
“……”
“Young master?”
At that moment, a man with a sturdy build and gentle face entered the room.
It was Lucas.
He was the only one in the mansion who could speak with Isaac.
“Just… thinking about the past.”
“How far back in the past?”
“About 20 years ago.”
“That’s quite a while. Instead of musty old memories, how about tasting some cheese filled with fresh flavor?”
“I also brought some of the books you mentioned. A scholar from the Azure Tower wrote a new volume.”
“He’s still alive, huh. It’s been over 20 years since he diagnosed my unusual condition. Nothing going on outside? Is everyone well?”
“Yes, of course. His Excellency, the Madam, and the second young master are all doing well. As for more details… due to His Excellency’s orders…”
“Father must have told you not to share outside news. So I wouldn’t be unnecessarily concerned.”
“Yes, that’s correct.”
“Alright. I just asked in case.”
“Thank you for understanding.”
Lucas scratched the back of his head awkwardly.
“Hoo…”
Isaac let out a sigh.
Even without hearing news directly from Lucas, he could vaguely guess what was happening outside.
The latest magic books were heavily focused on lethal magic.
Many of the papers Isaac had published under Jonas’s name while researching magic underground were being cited.
Some were even used as foundational theories for lethal spells or magical weaponry.
Signs of war were unmistakably thick in the air—or perhaps war had already begun.
The frustrating thing was not knowing who was at war with whom.
And to what extent the Goethe family was involved.
“Don’t worry too much. If the Goethe family had truly been caught up in war, we wouldn’t be able to care for you like this.”
Lucas had a point.
“There’s something more important to you than the continent’s affairs. You must focus on that.”
“…You’re right.”
Isaac nodded.
Solving his condition came first.
It was the path he had chosen.
Isaac’s father—Count Goethe—had made the right decision.
And having chosen, he must focus.
The rest is just unnecessary information.
Even after twenty years, his unique condition—the mana explosions—had not been resolved.
There was no room to be distracted.
He knew it too.
It was already far too late to turn back.
Even if he overcame his unusual condition, nothing would truly change.
Still, Isaac did not give up.
He would not give up until the end of his life.
If he fell, he would get back up.
That was all.
That was Isaac.
It was the trait of his family—of the Goethe bloodline.
While Isaac flipped through the books, Lucas began cleaning the room.
He emptied the chamber pot, cleared the laundry bin, and replaced it with neatly folded new clothes and fresh towels.
After more than ten years of doing this, he had become fast.
“Time to get up now.”
“You’re done already?”
“I’m going to be all bruised.”
Isaac chuckled.
If there was anything he enjoyed more than researching magic, it was this time.
“Huff… huff…”
Not long after, Isaac sat down, panting and leaning on a wooden sword.
As expected, his whole body was covered in bruises.
“Hah… I ask you every time, but why don’t you become a knight? Why waste such talent beside me?”
“I’ve told you before. At best, I’m just a soldier who’s slightly better with a sword.”
For quite some time, Isaac had learned swordsmanship from Lucas.
More than ten years, in fact.
It wasn’t because he slacked off, nor because Lucas was a bad teacher.
On the contrary, Lucas was an excellent mentor.
Yet, Isaac still couldn’t reach even Lucas’s toes.
Even now, Lucas could deflect and counter every one of Isaac’s strikes without moving a single step.
After getting smacked around with a wooden sword for ten years, Isaac had developed an eye for things.
There had been times when border knights visited the mansion and received sword lessons, and judging from those experiences, Lucas was already a superior knight.
“Then how about this answer? I, Lucas, vow in the name of a warrior to serve Isaac von Goethe.”
Suddenly, Lucas planted his wooden sword upright and dropped to one knee.
“What are you doing?”
“Isn’t it obvious? A pledge of loyalty. Please congratulate me—I’ve now become a knight.”
“Don’t mess around.”
“There’s no difference. The one I serve is you, young master. And I’ve already been serving you since the day you saved me.”
“You’re no fun.”
Isaac clicked his tongue.
Lucas said without a hint of a smile.
“A joke? That’s the funniest thing you’ve ever said.”
Isaac shook his head.
“It’s not a joke that you saved me. If you hadn’t shielded me back then, I would’ve died.”
A year or two past twenty years ago.
Lucas tried to steal an elixir owned by the family to save his wife, who was suffering from a fever.
But he was caught by the head attendant, and Lucas, who didn’t even know how to lie, was frozen stiff.
At the time, Isaac hadn’t yet gone underground and covered for him, saying he had ordered the elixir to be discarded.
Afterward, Lucas served for several years at the border fortress, Winterband, but when he heard that Isaac’s attendant had quit, he persistently sent letters to the head attendant.
He explained why he should serve Isaac, and what help he could offer.
Letters filled with tightly written words arrived at the mansion’s office every time.
The following year, Lucas got his wish and was allowed to serve Isaac.
Even though Isaac had requested that a stranger be sent to serve him.
“I told you, the elixir was useless to me anyway. It tasted awful too. I just passed it off because I didn’t want to drink it.”
“Didn’t you get whipped until you fainted because of that incident?”
“Even so, you never said a word about me. You only repeated that you threw it all away because you didn’t want it.”
“I was in pain and didn’t feel like answering.”
Isaac shrugged.
“You’re a truly good person, Young Master.”
Lucas said seriously.
“That sounds like a fresh kind of joke.”
Isaac turned his gaze away from Lucas.
It was something he didn’t want to hear.
Those who cared for him always ended up as victims.
“Lucas!”
But then Lucas suddenly coughed up blood.
It was hemoptysis.
One of the symptoms of mana poisoning.
It was because he had stayed by Isaac’s side for too long.
Even if there was no explosion, Isaac’s vessel was always cracked, causing mana to constantly leak out.
The Goethes were a family of mages.
They had an extremely high mana density from birth.
Because of that, Isaac’s mana was like poison to those with weak resistance.
“You’re spouting nonsense, and now you’re coughing up blood. Get out—now!”
Isaac handed him a towel and helped him out of the room.
“Hehe, Young Master, you really aren’t noble-like at all.”
“…Take a break for a while.”
“No, I refuse. If I’m not here, who will take care of you?”
“A prettier maid will do it. Rest until the poisoning subsides. You need at least a month. Until then, don’t come near me. Got it?”
“I can’t do that. You don’t have any friends, Young Master.”
“I’ll throw you out for insulting your lord.”
“Don’t come back. If you don’t cure your mana poisoning, you’re fired. I don’t want you showing up in my already messed-up dreams.”
“That’s quite the fresh threat.”
Lucas gave a weak smile.
“Enough nonsense. Now go for real. You’ll really die at this rate.”
Isaac left Lucas outside the room and shut the door.
“Don’t worry about me. You think I don’t know myself?
You’ve had dozens of explosions down here, but I haven’t lost a single hair. You won’t find anyone as good as me while I’m gone.”
Lucas’s voice came from beyond the door.
“You only have one life. You might have dodged it dozens of times, but you could lose everything in a single moment. It’s fine if you don’t come back. Pass the job to someone else if it’s a hassle and focus on the child you’re expecting.
Don’t make Anna worry.”
“You nag even more than my wife.”
“If you’re going to do it, become a real knight. Anna would like that better too… Now go. I’m going to meditate. Don’t disturb me.”
“Yes, Young Master. It’s been… a pleasure.”
Isaac heard Lucas’s words but pretended not to.
He felt that trying to interpret the meaning behind them would weaken his resolve.
However, he listened until the sound of Lucas’s footsteps completely disappeared.
He was worried that if the mana poisoning triggered a seizure, Lucas might not make it out of the underground.
Isaac muttered after Lucas’s presence had completely vanished.
Isaac muttered to himself again and let out a hollow laugh.
He had said something similar twenty years ago.
So then, had he not made any progress at all?
While blaming his ever-unchanging self, Isaac silently prayed for blessings for Lucas’s unborn child.
At the very least, he hoped it wouldn’t live a life like his.
He hoped it would grow up like Lucas, surrounded by the love of its parents.
And then another year passed.
“Huff, huff, huff…”
Cold sweat made his already cold forehead feel even cooler.
The nightmare was always the same.
Hans, the nanny, and the two maids—killed by a mana explosion.
They were all preparing dinner together.
Outside, a midwinter blizzard raged.
But inside the house, it was warm and cheerful.
Hans hummed a tune as he fed dry firewood into the hearth.
The maids sang along with Hans as they prepared the meal.
The nanny laid a cloth on the table and began placing cups, forks, spoons, and knives one by one.
It was warm and pleasant.
His heart softened.
But something felt off.
A strange anxiety twisted beneath the kind atmosphere.
Thud. Thud. Thud.
Someone pounded hard on the wooden door.
It was a man wrapped tightly in a fur cloak.
His head and shoulders were dusted with snow, as if he had walked through a snowstorm for a long time.
“Sorry I’m late. You haven’t started dinner yet, right?”
It was Lucas.
“Oh my, it must be freezing out. Come in, come in.”
The nanny welcomed him with joy.
“No! Don’t come in!”
Isaac shouted desperately.
But Lucas had already stepped inside.
“It’s been a while, Young Master.”
Lucas smiled brightly.
Isaac’s face twisted in despair.
That was where the dream always ended.
Isaac wiped his cold sweat and stared blankly at the mold on the wall.
It had been a year since Lucas hadn’t returned.
At some point, the head attendant Schiller began taking Lucas’s place himself.
Isaac had asked Schiller about Lucas several times,
But the attendant only repeated the same answer: that Lucas had quit and nothing was heard from him since.
Another month passed.
An unexpected figure visited the hidden underground chamber.
It was Count Goethe.
“It’s been a while, Father.”
After exchanging one line each, father and son stood in silence.
Neither was happy about this reunion.
It was a meeting that only reminded them of the wounds they had left on each other.
Nothing had been resolved, and only time had passed meaninglessly.
After a long silence, the Count finally spoke.
“Lucas is dead.”
The still air in the room began to sizzle, as if something was boiling.
Isaac’s vessel was cracking again.
