TESL 05

Chapter 05

I failed to properly grasp the complicated power struggle, and as a result, I was resented by nearly everyone in the imperial palace.

At the time, it felt as though everyone was trying to obstruct my love—but looking back with a clear mind, it was only natural.

The daughter of the old noble faction’s leader clinging to the Crown Prince who led the new noble faction—of course that would be troublesome for both sides.

My father’s faction, the old nobles, scolded me. Rubelrus’s faction, the new nobles, mocked me and told me to know my place.

Amid all that, when even the Crown Prince turned his back on me, the only person who pitied and sheltered me was Her Majesty the Empress. Ah—should I call her the Empress Dowager now?

Thinking about it now makes my chest ache a little. How frustrating I must have been to my father.

A foolish youngest daughter with flowers blooming in her head, insisting that everything would be solved if she married Rubelrus.

“I should’ve come to my senses back then.”

“But would that even have been possible?”

When I muttered to the empty air, staring off into space, Reni—resting her chin on the open window frame—turned to me and asked. Her ash-gray eyes studied me intently.

She already knew the truth.

As perceptive as ever.

With a bitter smile, I shook my head.

“…No. It was impossible.”

I feel wave after wave of regret, but when I think back to that time, I can’t help feeling there was no other way.

Even I can admit it—I was completely in love.

Yes, I was immature. But it was love.

“…If the Empire held a Most Embarrassing Past competition, wouldn’t I win first place?”

“Not just first. You’d get a special grand prize.”

“Ha.”

I pretended to laugh and leaned my head fully against the carriage seat.

Until I turned sixteen, my catchphrase had been, “When I turn sixteen.”
When I turn sixteen. When I become an adult. On my sixteenth birthday. On the day of my debutante ball.

Whenever things were hard, I would chant those words like a spell.

When I turned sixteen, I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. The cold-hearted His Highness would smile at me again like a flower in bloom.

Everyone who had looked down on me would acknowledge my abilities. Everything would reconcile just the way I wished.

My dreams always ended the same way—surrounded by everyone’s congratulations, sharing a sweet kiss with His Highness Rubelrus.

Reality was different from fantasy. I had believed I was the future Crown Princess, but in truth, I was nothing more than a foolish young lady.

A stupid girl clinging to the Crown Prince, unaware that her father’s influence was already setting like the sun.

…And perhaps the Crown Prince thought the same of me.

To make matters worse, it ended in the most humiliating way possible. That… unauthorized intrusion into the imperial palace.

Damn it. Being back in the palace is stirring up emotions I thought I’d buried.

I had believed I would never return here again… I squeezed my eyes shut in despair.

“I should’ve smuggled in a prohibited item.”

“And as I keep saying, it’s already too late.”

Reni looked at me gently and pointed out the window.

“We’re almost at the main palace.”

Through the window, I saw the golden roof and the beautiful cream-colored palace beyond.

If someone asked how I felt at that moment, I could sum it up in three words:

Ah… I’m doomed.

A deep crimson carpet, distinctively imperial, covered the high staircase leading up to the main palace.

Imperial attendants lined up and rushed to each arriving carriage, politely opening doors and placing stepping stools.

The nobles stepped down and began climbing the stairs.

Finally, it was our turn. The door opened, and a servant brought the stool.

The coachman presented our invitation, and another attendant bowed deeply.

“Viscount Delion of the Delion County and Lady Wildenbiston of the Ducal House of Wildenbiston. Your invitations have been confirmed. Welcome to the palace.”

The future Count Delion—bearing a courtesy title one rank below his father’s—grinned at me, gathered his coattails, and stepped confidently down.

I, however, was still hesitating inside the carriage.

Ah. I really didn’t want to get out.

Did I truly have to go?

“Hey, what are you doing? Get down. The carriages behind us are waiting, Ira!”

“…I’m coming. I said I’m coming.”

As if he had no idea what I was feeling. Look at the confident young heir of Delion urging me along. Of course he had nothing to fear.

With a heavy sigh, I crawled out of the carriage as if I were some swamp monster. The door shut behind me, and the carriage rolled away.

My escape route was cut off.

I stared gloomily at the staircase before me.

The famous Fifty-Six Steps.

Whether noble or servant, anyone entering the palace had to ascend them on their own two feet.

This had once been one of my favorite places in the palace.

Because of a romantic legend.

The story of the first Empress of Jaherd, Shila Devant.

Shila Devant had been the illegitimate daughter of a minor noble family. One day, she secretly attended an imperial ball without her family’s knowledge. When discovered, she fled—dropping a glass slipper on these very steps.

The first Emperor of Jaherd, smitten with her, turned the entire empire upside down searching for the owner of that single glass slipper. And when he found her, he married her.

A perfect love story.

I used to replay that story endlessly in my mind, imagining and reimagining it, believing firmly—

That one day, I too would climb these steps with the one I loved.

I stood frozen at the foot of the stairs for a long time.

The strength drained from my shoulders.

Ah, Ira. You still haven’t come to your senses.

Even as I scolded myself, I had no confidence to climb those steps.

I didn’t want to go up there.

I had only just convinced myself I had forgotten him. Only just believed I could finally let him go.

It seemed I hadn’t forgotten well enough to face the remnants of the past unscathed.

I wanted to run away. Just run—

…Wait.

I casually glanced around.

Countless nobles who had disembarked from their carriages were slowly climbing the stairs. Reni was nowhere in sight.

Bianca, Elphine, Mother, Father—they had all gone ahead.

“Hm.”

Pressing my lips together, I raised one eyebrow.

The attendants looked busy. No one spared me a glance.

So… if I disappeared right now, no one would notice.

The carriage was gone—but was there truly no escape?

A slow grin spread across my face.

I had a very good idea.

From the palace, it takes about five minutes by carriage to reach the Great Imperial Forest. From the outside, it seems quite distant—but in truth, it takes less than two minutes on foot.

The carriage takes longer because the road winds around the forest to create a sufficiently wide route.

Few people knew this. In fact, it was classified information.

The imperial family had to know, since any emergency escape routes from the palace passed through the forest.

And the reason I, someone who was not royalty, knew this secret was simple.

Rubelrus had told me.

As I mentioned before, when I was four, I wandered the palace and got lost in the middle of the forest.

Rubelrus had found me then. After that, whenever I got lost nearby, he would take my hand and teach me the paths one by one.

Yes… he had once been kind.

At least until I turned ten.

After that, he became cold as if none of it had ever happened.

“He really was kind back then.”

No wonder a foolish girl like me misunderstood. I thought Rubelrus liked me too…

No—His Highness Rubelrus… no, soon it would be His Majesty.

I slowly descended the Fifty-Six Steps and slipped away from the crowd at an even pace.

No one paid me any attention.

Had my scandal from three years ago already been forgotten? I wasn’t sure whether to call that fortunate.

After that, it was easy. I could find my way blindfolded.

Follow the left wall, loop behind, cross the grand lawn and landscaped gardens—and the third passage would lead directly to the Great Imperial Forest.

As the fresh scent of the woods filled my nose again, I smiled unconsciously.

“This is it.”

Three years later, and I hadn’t lost my touch.

Satisfied, I gathered my skirts and strode into the forest.

I was glad I had stubbornly insisted on low heels while dressing. They weren’t ideal for long walking, but at least they were strapped securely around my ankles.

“Well, I won’t be walking long anyway.”

Muttering to myself, I ventured deeper into the trees.

My plan was simple: hide in the forest until the coronation ceremony ended, then rejoin my family as they exited and ride home with them.

A perfect plan to skip out, wasn’t it?

I’d always been good at things like this—hiding so well everyone was impressed. It was a particularly useful talent at times like these.

Besides, I already knew several spots in the forest suitable for resting in a dress. I had skipped out in the palace before.

Some of those spots even had foldable stools hidden inside tree stumps, along with handkerchiefs I’d tucked away.

“…Though I probably can’t use those anymore.”

That had been three years ago.

The stools were likely rusted at the hinges, and the handkerchiefs probably shredded by squirrels or ruined by rain.

As I pondered where to go, I suddenly stopped.

There was one place.

One place in this vast forest I had visited more than any other. A place I cherished.

But that place was…

Where I first met Rubelrus.

Should I go, or not?

Frowning, I hesitated.

The reason I loved that spot in the first place was because of him. Wouldn’t it make sense not to go?

But if I avoided it because of him, wouldn’t that mean I still cared too much?

Not that I didn’t care, exactly, but still…

“…I’ll go.”

I couldn’t ignore such a perfect hiding spot just because of Rubelrus.

With that, I began walking briskly toward it.