🔊 TTS Settings
chapter 01
When People Die, They Close Their Eyes
“How long do I have left?”
“At most three months… no, even one month would be dangerous.”
“Is that so?”
The woman who had just been told of her impending death nodded calmly. The one who grew emotional instead was the maid standing behind her.
“Maria, why are you crying? This isn’t something to be so surprised about.”
“Your Majesty… No. That can’t be true.”
“Looks like this stubborn life of mine is finally coming to an end.”
The woman who had received her death sentence looked oddly relieved.
The physician, instead of prescribing any special medicine, left behind only something to ease the pain before leaving the room.
Miren Edgar Warden.
The empire’s one and only terminally ill empress had finally been given a date for her death—quietly and without fuss.
“It’s something I already knew. That I wouldn’t live very long.”
“…Please don’t say things like that in front of His Majesty. He’ll be terribly saddened.”
“Will he? Perhaps. He’s a strange man. To marry me, knowing my life would be this short.”
Miren lifted her trembling hand and brushed back her hair.
The aftereffects of the medicine she had taken were strong—her hands wouldn’t move properly.
Worse still, her breathing was labored, and rough breaths scraped painfully through her throat.
But she accepted it all with familiarity.
It had always been this way. This body had long been frail.
“Your Majesty… His Majesty’s feelings are sincere.”
“I know. That’s why it’s so strange.”
Why would someone love a dying empress?
She couldn’t understand him at all.
When she was born, they said she wouldn’t live past ten.
When she passed ten, they said she wouldn’t reach adulthood.
And yet her husband—the emperor—had accepted marriage to such a woman as though it were the most natural thing in the world.
Even knowing it would damage his political standing.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Bang!
The bedroom door burst open.
When Miren lifted her gaze, she saw the very man they had just been speaking of.
“Miren. I heard the physician came.”
“You’re here, Your Majesty.”
“I told you to call me Ryan when we’re alone.”
“…Maria is here.”
Ryan, who had been striding forward, stopped and glanced toward the maid by the door.
The moment their eyes met, Maria bowed deeply and hurried out.
Now, as he wished, only the two of them remained.
Ryan sat beside the wide bed and quietly studied Miren’s face.
His expression was stiff—uncharacteristically so.
“Isn’t it time for you to rest? Why did you come?”
“I heard you were given… a date.”
Even saying the word “death” seemed to weigh heavily on him.
He lifted his rough hands and cupped her cheeks.
They were cold.
Miren closed her eyes at the touch.
His hands were careful, desperate—like someone holding fragile glass.
“You’re going to die?”
“You already know, Ryan. There’s nothing more that can be done.”
Miren smiled faintly.
Her hollowed cheeks made even that smile look pitiful.
If not for the faint warmth still in her body, she wouldn’t have seemed alive at all.
“How can you say that so easily? Do you know what I feel when I watch you sleeping? I hate myself for being able to do nothing for you. I rule this empire, yet I can’t even save one person…”
“…Ryan.”
“Sometimes I want to die. To hold you and close my eyes together, never to open them again. Is that wrong? Is it wrong that I’m starting to hate you when I see you sleeping like that…?”
At last, Ryan pulled his hands away and covered his own face.
He didn’t want her to see how pathetic he looked.
Why was he the only healthy one?
If only they could die together.
If Miren were gone, life itself would lose its meaning.
But he couldn’t say that aloud.
“Miren… shall we have dinner together tomorrow?”
“…Dinner?”
“I might only be able to swallow some soup, but if that’s okay…”
Ryan let out a hollow laugh at how something so small made his heart race.
He knew it. This was her way of comforting him.
Miren reached out and gently stroked his hair.
An utterly improper act—but neither of them minded.
“You’re cruel, Miren.”
“Am I?”
“Why do you keep touching feelings you won’t accept?”
Miren simply smiled.
They were already married, after all. Refusing his feelings now would be absurd.
But this was the only kindness she could offer.
She had been abandoned even by her father—Ryan was the only one who cherished her life this deeply.
That was why she had ignored his feelings for so long.
“Are you sleepy, Miren?”
“Perhaps… it’s time to sleep.”
Blink. Blink.
The night was already deep. Soon the moon would set and dawn would come.
Time always passed too quickly when Ryan came after finishing his work.
Too quickly.
With drooping eyelids, Miren whispered,
“Ryan.”
“Yes, Miren.”
“My death… isn’t your fault.”
“……”
“So please… live long. For me too.”
Her voice slowed.
By the end, it almost seemed as though her breath had stopped.
Ryan leaned close and pressed his ear to her chest.
Thump… thump…
Her small heartbeat was weak, but still there.
Whenever she slept, Ryan’s heart felt like it was breaking.
Unable to endure it, he climbed fully onto the bed and held her close.
At fifteen, when they first met, he had been much smaller.
Now, at nearly 190 centimeters, the bed shook beneath his weight.
Even so, Miren didn’t wake.
She never knew that he always held her while she slept.
Never knew how many times each night he pressed his ear to her chest just to make sure her heart was still beating.
“Miren.”
Ah… don’t wake me yet.
I don’t want to get up.
“Miren!”
The sharp voice jolted her awake.
She opened her eyes wide—and saw an angry face looming over her.
“…Mom. Don’t wake me up when I’m sleeping.”
“What time do you think it is? The rooster’s been crowing for ages!”
“Then it’s barely dawn!”
“Oh my, you’re so lazy. And your name’s the same as the empress’s, too.”
At the word “empress,” Miren’s shoulders twitched.
But she quickly retorted confidently.
“Mom, the empress is lazy too. She just lies around all day.”
“Oh? And how would you know that?”
“Who in the empire doesn’t know the empress is sick?”
Shrugging, Miren ran down the stairs.
The old wooden steps creaked with every step.
She glanced sideways at the dusty window, tangled with cobwebs.
Reflected in the glass was a girl with pink hair, pale pink eyes, and a healthy flush.
Not a great beauty—but cute enough.
Very different from the terminally ill Empress Miren Edgar.
“Mom! What about the laundry?”
“Your father and Gren went to do it!”
“Then I’ll go to the mountain! Tell Dad I’ll be in the fields by lunch!”
“Eat first!”
Her mother called after her, but Miren shook her head.
She had an errand from the old apothecary and was in a hurry.
“I’ll eat when I get back!”
The cold morning air rushed at her as she stepped outside.
She pressed her straw hat down to keep it from flying off.
Being able to move so freely made her smile.
Since as far back as she could remember, she had lived as both Empress Miren Edgar and commoner Miren Wood.
All through sleep.
For twenty-five years.
At first, she hadn’t thought it strange.
She assumed everyone lived like this.
That was why she once asked her parents:
“Mom, why do I have two dads?”
Her father cried that day.
Since then, she never spoke of her dreams again.
By the time she understood the truth, the empress’s body was already badly deteriorated.
“Found it.”
She had reached the mountain early and found the herb she was looking for.
Sleep grass—high in demand lately due to widespread insomnia.
If she brought it to the old apothecary, she’d probably get one gold.
As she carefully gathered it, she noticed something odd.
The bushes nearby were crushed.
A bear? A monster?
This far down the mountain, it was unlikely…
Still, she approached cautiously.
If there was a wild animal nearby, she’d have to warn her father.
But what she found wasn’t a beast.
“Um… hello?”
“Ugh…”
A white-haired man lay collapsed in the brush.
Blood was pooling beneath him.
As Miren hesitated, the man suddenly reached out and grabbed her.
“Ah—!”
Thud.
Both of them disappeared into the tall grass.
