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Chapter : 28
“Your Grace.”
“Oh, Freya.”
When she opened the door and stepped inside, Raiden was pacing near the table. Why wasn’t he sitting? Seeing him constantly avert his gaze, looking both anxious and troubled, Freya tilted her head.
“Is something wrong? Why are you so restless?”
“Well, um… Is it really all right, Freya?”
“All right with what?”
“The engagement papers… the rumor has already spread quite a lot, hasn’t it? People are talking about you too. I was worried it might scare you…”
His deeply furrowed brows and the way he looked at her showed how concerned he was.
‘So he was worried I might be hurt by people’s gossip.’
As soon as word got out that Raiden had sent her an engagement proposal, most reactions were either “That’s surprising,” or “Why the Marquis of Valche’s daughter?”
As time passed, the talk shifted from “How did the Duke of Betelheim and the Marquis of Valche’s daughter end up together?” to “What on earth did the Marquis of Valche’s daughter do for the Duke of Betelheim to choose her?” The curiosity spread, and attention turned squarely toward her.
But it wasn’t scary. Annoying and unpleasant, yes, but not frightening.
Freya answered calmly, “You don’t have to worry. I expected this to some extent. It doesn’t affect me at all.”
“Still, I’m concerned. There are people who say things that cross the line.”
“Those kinds of people can just be ignored. If you engage with them, it only gets more tiring. But if someone goes too far, I’d like you to take care of it for me, Your Grace.”
“Of course.”
Raiden nodded and replied in a firm voice.
“I promised I’d protect you. I won’t let anyone who speaks ill of you get away with it.”
“It’s enough if you just restrain the ones who go too far. Thank you, Your Grace.”
Smiling slightly, Freya stepped closer to him. Startled by the suddenly shortened distance, he felt her take hold of his sleeve.
“It looks like your cuff button might fall off. I’ll fasten it for you.”
“Ah…”
Watching Freya gently fix the cuff button, Raiden stiffened. Her hand brushed against the back of his hand and wrist for just a moment, yet the cool touch of her skin made him strangely tense.
“All done.”
“Th-thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Seeing him quickly pull his hand back, Freya shrugged.
If he gets this flustered over something like this, will he really be able to act like a proper fiancé later?
‘We’ll have to attend plenty of parties as partners. Forget linking arms—will he even be able to hold my hand?’
His boyish reactions were refreshing, but also a bit worrying. If they were going to act, they had to do it convincingly to avoid suspicion. And that was what Raiden wanted too.
Looking at him turning away with a reddened face, Freya asked, “By the way, Your Grace, was that all you came for?”
“Oh, no. I came to inform you about the security corps inspection scheduled in three days. And my mother asked me to pass something along.”
“What is it?”
“She said she’ll announce the engagement as soon as we receive the Marquis family’s reply. And she’d like to host the engagement party at our ducal house.”
“An engagement party?”
Her expression twisted at the unwelcome news.
An engagement party was something nobles customarily held once a match was settled, and to make this plan perfect, of course they needed one.
But since Freya didn’t like parties to begin with, she couldn’t react positively.
“I know it’s something we have to do, but I’m not really looking forward to it.”
“Is it burdensome after all?”
“No, it’s just that I don’t like parties themselves. You have to stay for a long time in uncomfortable clothes, and it’s boring.”
“Ah, I suppose that’s true since ladies wear dresses. As for it being boring… I feel the same.”
“You too, Your Grace?”
So Raiden thought the same. She hadn’t expected him to agree so bluntly.
Catching her gaze, he gave an awkward little smile. “It’s hard to sit somewhere for a long time when it doesn’t interest me. And I’m not fond of chatting with people, so I don’t really like those kinds of gatherings.”
“I see. That’s surprising. You always seem kind and friendly, talking to anyone, anywhere.”
“I’m used to putting on polite kindness. My mother taught me never to make enemies, and in a way it became a sort of shield, so it turned into my default behavior.”
Then he added, “Still, creating that kindness can be tiring sometimes.”
‘So that’s why I sometimes felt a sense of distance.’
He was kind and gentle to everyone, but he always kept a certain line, which made it easy to tell whether he was truly trying to connect or not.
Thinking back, even when he talked with Astella, he always kept his distance and deflected things appropriately.
Why hadn’t she realized that at the time?
‘Was he the same with me too…? It felt a little different, though.’
With that sudden thought, Freya asked him, “Then… do you treat me differently from other people?”
“Of course I do.”
Raiden answered without hesitation.
“How could you be the same as others to me?”
People he barely knew, or those he only exchanged pleasantries with—ordinary people who meant little to him—couldn’t possibly be the same as her. It didn’t even make sense to put them on the same level.
“You’re the only one I can be sincere with, and want to be sincere with.”
“….”
His direct gaze met hers. Before she knew it, heat had filled his golden eyes.
Unused to such blunt expressions, Freya tried to hide the unfamiliar feeling stirring inside her and asked carefully, “Why… do you go that far? What am I, to you…?”
What did she mean to him?
Having never liked someone romantically before, nor been liked in that way, she honestly still couldn’t understand Raiden’s feelings.
What was so special about her that he could be this blindly devoted? She wasn’t particularly outstanding—just ordinary.
“You don’t have to think about it so hard, Freya.”
Sensing her turmoil, Raiden smiled gently.
“There are countless reasons you’re special, but just remember one thing.”
“…What is it?”
“That you’re special simply because you’re you.”
There were many big and small reasons, but if he had to choose just one most convincing answer, it would be this:
‘She herself is special to me.’
If he had to sum up all the reasons in one phrase, wouldn’t it be this? Even if it sounded cliché, it was the best way he could express what he felt.
“…All right.”
She answered, but Freya couldn’t quite accept his words.
‘In truth… if you think about it, the person he loves isn’t really me.’
Even though he was showing such affection right in front of her, she knew his feelings weren’t truly directed at her.
The person Raiden loved with all his heart was the “Freya” who existed before she possessed this body.
‘If he finds out the person inside is different, will he be disappointed? Angry?’
He might even grab her by the collar, accusing her of daring to pretend to be Freya. Maybe that was an exaggeration, but either way, it wouldn’t be a good reaction.
‘What I’m doing now is deceiving him, but I don’t have a choice.’
Having possessed this body, she had to survive somehow. There was no way back, nor even the hope of it.
“If that made you uncomfortable, I’m sorry.”
Raiden said carefully, watching her face. Freya looked at him for a moment, then shook her head.
“It’s not that. I just didn’t understand.”
“Didn’t understand?”
“Yes. That someone could like a person like me… I thought you must have quite a unique taste.”
“……”
At her words, Raiden’s eyes widened for a moment. A faint smile touched his lips, but then he frowned.
“Don’t talk about yourself like that.”
“Why not? I’m blunt, not kind like other young ladies, and not gentle either. That’s why everyone tends to avoid me.”
“That’s not true. You’re kinder and more lovely than anyone.”
“I respect that personal view of yours, Your Grace, but I can’t really understand it.”
It seemed the blinders of first love were firmly in place. For her to make him fall this deeply— in another sense, the former owner of this body was impressive.
