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Chapter 84
It had been a while since Lucia last visited Bern, and the two spent some time discussing various matters regarding their engagement ceremony.
“Then, I suppose it would be best to hold the engagement ceremony after the Summer Festival.”
“……….”
“The Summer Festival is only two weeks away. If we try to prepare for the engagement ceremony before then, we won’t have nearly enough time.”
“……….”
“And what should we do about the formal attire you’ll be wearing?”
“……….”
Lucia, who had been looking over the engagement preparation list, lifted her head when she realized she wasn’t hearing any response.
She had felt from the moment they met that Bern was acting strangely, but now he seemed completely distracted, as if his mind had drifted somewhere far away.
Lucia waved her hand in front of his eyes.
“Bern? Bern!”
“……Ah! S-sorry. What did you just say?”
Bern finally snapped back to reality, flustered.
“We were deciding the date for the engagement ceremony, right? I’m afraid I’ll be tied up with work until the festival begins, so that period would be difficult.”
He was now bringing up things they had already finished discussing.
To Lucia, Bern still didn’t seem fully present.
Eventually, she set the papers down on the table.
“At this rate, we won’t be able to discuss anything today.”
“I’m so sorry. Are you… angry with me?”
“No, I’m not angry. It’s just that you haven’t been able to focus at all since we met.”
“I have no excuse.”
Bern hung his head and apologized repeatedly. Looking exhausted, he removed his glasses and rubbed his face.
“It was hard to even schedule today’s meeting. You must’ve been really busy.”
Lucia said it absentmindedly, but Bern flinched as if her words hit a nerve.
He should have made plans earlier to discuss the engagement. But he kept putting it off with various excuses, and only today had they finally met.
“Or… is something worrying you?”
Her sincere concern made guilt rise in Bern’s chest.
The reason he had postponed their meeting so many times… was because of Celine.
Even after the day she injured her ankle, she continued lingering around him.
Each time he saw her limping, unable to fully walk, he couldn’t bring himself to push her away coldly.
And so, unintentionally, he ended up seeing Celine almost every day.
He hadn’t planned on giving her space, but regardless of his intentions, it was true that he had been meeting Celine while neglecting Lucia.
It felt like he was cheating, and guilt slowly weighed on him.
“No, it’s nothing. I’ve just been tired lately. Sorry for making you worry.”
“Work is important, but take it slow. You’ll collapse at this rate.”
“…Yes, I’ll do that.”
“Hmm, your condition doesn’t look good today, so let’s stop here. But let’s at least set the engagement date before we part. You said things won’t settle until after the Summer Festival, right?”
“Yes, once the festival ends, work should calm down. So it would be best to hold the engagement ceremony afterwards.”
“Then how about we push it even further back?”
“Further? Didn’t you want to have it before summer?”
“I did, but there’s more to prepare than I expected. I think it would be better to give ourselves ample time.”
Bern sighed lightly as he looked at the documents spread on the table.
These were all things Lucia had organized for the engagement—tasks she took on because Bern was too busy.
“I feel like I’m making things harder for you.”
“No need to feel sorry. You’re already busy with work—I can’t add more burdens on you. And I’m relatively free compared to you, so it makes sense that I handle this part.”
“But preparing all this must’ve been a lot of work. Everything is organized so thoroughly. I didn’t expect so many things were needed for an engagement ceremony. You’re amazing, Lucia.”
Though Bern meant to compliment her, Lucia felt oddly uncomfortable.
Not because of Bern—but because she had thrown herself into these preparations for an impure reason.
Honestly, I chose this work as a means of escape…
Ever since the day she had kissed Herwin, she’d been thinking about him every day.
He even appeared in her dreams, to the point that she couldn’t function normally. She feared she might run straight to him, abandoning Bern.
So she deliberately took on tasks Bern was supposed to handle and buried herself in engagement preparations.
By constantly reminding herself of her relationship with Bern and exhausting her mind and body, she tried to erase Herwin from her thoughts.
Fortunately, while immersed in preparations, she could keep Herwin out of her mind.
Although… he continued to send letters and gifts, constantly shaking her resolve.
At least he hadn’t come to see her in person—that was the one thing she was grateful for.
“Then shall we postpone the engagement ceremony a little longer, just as you suggested?”
“Yes, let’s do that. There’s no need to rush.”
“Once my urgent work settles down, I’ll help with the preparations too. And since we’re postponing it, you should rest a little.”
“Ah… yes…”
Lucia felt a sudden fear wash over her.
If she had nothing left to occupy her mind… wouldn’t Herwin seep back into her thoughts again?
But she couldn’t let that show.
There was no way she could tell Bern what had happened between her and Herwin.
Realizing she was once again thinking of Herwin, she hurried to change the subject.
“You’ll be attending the Summer Festival this year, right?”
“Of course. It’s one of the Empire’s largest events.”
“Then are you also attending the Hunting Festival on the second day?”
Bern hesitated at the mention of the Hunting Festival.
“Well… to be honest, I’m not very good at physical activities. So compared to others, I’m not much of a hunter. But still…”
Bern gave an awkward smile before looking at her with gentle eyes.
“For my fiancée, I’ll at least try to catch a fox.”
…Was he flirting? Or was this another one of his occasional playful remarks?
Lucia blinked, caught off guard, then smiled.
“Then I should prepare a handkerchief for my fiancé. Do you have any preferred patterns or animals?”
“Anything is fine, as long as it’s made by you.”
“You know that ‘anything’ is the hardest answer, right?”
“Haha, is that so? Hmm, then…”
As Bern thought, his expression suddenly stiffened.
He had unknowingly thought of Celine.
‘Bern, look! Isn’t it pretty?’
Back in their academy days—in their secret room—Celine had proudly shown him a handkerchief she embroidered.
With delicate blue thread, she had stitched small, beautiful flowers.
‘What flower is that?’
‘Forget-me-not. It’s my favorite flower.’
‘Oh? Why?’
Celine had grinned and whispered in his ear.
‘Because its meaning is “true love.”’
They had only been dating for about a year then. Bern had found her shy smile incredibly beautiful.
The handkerchief she finished that day ended up in his possession, and afterward she often embroidered forget-me-nots.
There was another meaning besides “true love,” wasn’t there…?
“Bern?”
Lucia’s voice snapped him out of his lingering memories.
He had now thought of Celine twice right in front of his fiancée.
What are you doing? Get a grip!
He forced a smile.
“Sorry, I spaced out. Truly, anything is fine.”
“You’re giving me quite a difficult assignment, you know?”
When Lucia pouted, Bern laughed.
“Then… please use the emblem of our Casper family.”
Lucia seemed satisfied with that.
“All right. If you’re going to catch a fox, I should put in some effort too.”
“Ah…”
Bern looked flustered, making Lucia chuckle mischievously.
“You’re joking, right?”
“No, I’m not. You promised to catch a fox for me first.”
“A-ah… then I suppose I should start practicing right away.”
Lucia grinned and began gathering the papers on the table.
After organizing them, she stood.
“Even if you’re busy, let’s meet once before the Summer Festival.”
“Yes. I’ll make sure to free up time.”
“You must be tired, so get some rest. I’ll get going now.”
Bern followed her to see her off. Watching Lucia’s brown hair swaying, he parted his lips.
“Lucia.”
She turned back. He knew it was rude to bring this up, but… if anyone might know, it would be Lucia.
“Do you… know forget-me-not flowers?”
“Forget-me-nots? They’re a type of flower, right?”
“Yes. When you mentioned embroidery earlier, forget-me-nots came to mind, but I couldn’t recall their meaning. Do you know it?”
Bern swallowed without meaning to.
Even though Lucia didn’t know the truth, asking about a flower tied to memories with his ex was rude.
Yet he desperately wanted to know the meaning besides “true love.” So desperately he wanted the answer now.
Lucia thought for a moment.
“I’m not an expert, but I’m pretty sure forget-me-nots mean true love.”
“I… see.”
So she didn’t know the other meaning. Bern’s shoulders slumped unintentionally.
“Oh, there was one more.”
Lucia suddenly added.
“‘Don’t forget me.’”
“…What?”
“That’s also the flower’s meaning. ‘Don’t forget me.’ It comes right after ‘true love.’ Now that I think about it, forget-me-nots are quite a lovely flower.”
Bern felt as though he had been struck.
He finally remembered what Celine had told him in the secret room.
‘Ever since I started dating you, forget-me-nots became my favorite. Whenever you see them, think of me. Promise?’
Back then, as lovers, it must’ve simply been a wish to always love each other.
But now that they had broken up, the meaning hit differently.
His heart felt hollow. He remembered the despair on Celine’s face when he told her he was meeting Lucia.
“But if you know forget-me-nots, does that mean you’re interested in flowers? Most men only know common ones like roses or tulips.”
“…I learned about them by chance.”
“Do you like forget-me-nots?”
Like them? He wasn’t sure. But whenever he saw them, he thought of Celine.
“No, I don’t like them.”
“Hmm, is that so?”
His expression didn’t match his words—it clearly held a story behind it.
Lucia didn’t know what memories he had with the flower, but she decided she would embroider forget-me-nots into the handkerchief as well.
“I said something unnecessary. Let me walk you to your carriage.”
Bern quickly regained composure and escorted her.
As always, he sent her off with his usual gentle demeanor.
