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Chapter 7
“Are you uncomfortable, Saya?”
The lighting in the coffee house was dim. It seemed deliberately chosen that way, since this place was meant for lovers. With the low lighting, no one paid much attention even if people kissed.
The man deliberately sat down right beside me. The discomfort seemed to be mine alone, so I shook my head.
“I’m fine.”
“If you sit there with that expression, it’ll be obvious.”
He smiled softly, pointing out my expression. He was right. I forced a wide smile to match his.
He nudged one of the glowing, floating spheres with his hand. The light dimmed further, and soon our surroundings were cloaked in darkness. Now, others wouldn’t be able to see us clearly.
“Much better, isn’t it?”
“…Yes, it is.”
Just like he said, with the light gone it was easier to relax. I didn’t need to keep managing my expression anymore.
“So, who exactly are you trying not to get caught by?”
“Random strangers?”
He said this as he reached out, slipped his hand under the edge of my hood, and pushed it back slightly so that my face showed.
“If that’s your goal, you’ll have to show at least this much.”
His fingers brushed through my hair, leaving the spot tingling.
Our coffee was placed in front of us, and the waitress’s gaze lingered on him before moving away. But he looked completely unaffected, his attention fixed solely on me.
“I have a question.”
“What is it?”
I was glad he asked—talking about anything would make us look more natural.
I was terrible at socializing, and it was worse when the person across from me was this handsome. The only reason I was enduring the situation was because of the circumstances.
“Why are you trying to find that person?”
“I told you, didn’t I? Because we’re old friends…”
“If they were truly precious to you, shouldn’t you have stayed in touch from the beginning?”
Norman Erdonar had wanted me to cut ties with the orphanage completely. In Erdonar, there was nothing I could decide for myself. He wanted me to belong entirely to the Erdonar household, so he isolated me.
Until I was properly trained in manners and knowledge as one of the Erdonars, I wasn’t allowed to take a single step outside the mansion.
His sharp gaze made me feel like I was being interrogated by Chaedy. But his question was personal—something a hired man like him had no real need to know.
“I can explain it once I meet Chaedy.”
“Then you should be able to explain it to me too.”
“…Why?”
At my question, Chadwick was silent for a moment.
“…Actually, I think I may have found someone who could be Chaedy.”
“Really?”
Without realizing it, I raised my voice. Chadwick quickly covered my mouth, pulling me closer in the process.
“…You mustn’t shout.”
Removing his hand so it wouldn’t look strange, he whispered in my ear.
“That person is very suspicious of others.”
The sudden whisper made the hairs at the back of my neck stand on end. He pulled away with a grin, looking so at ease, like a lover teasing his partner.
Chaedy’s childhood obsession with cleanliness seemed unchanged even now. Thinking of the young Chaedy brought a smile to my face without me realizing it.
Chadwick was still sitting close, maintaining that short distance.
“So, you’ll need to give them an answer they can accept.”
I paused to take a breath. It had been a long time since I’d spoken about my past to anyone.
The first person to take that from me was Kirill.
“You might have guessed already, but I’m from the Dorlin Orphanage too.”
“……”
“I was adopted before Chaedy. Even after I was adopted, I tried to stay in touch with the orphanage, but I wasn’t allowed.”
“The person who adopted you?”
I gave a small nod. I’d never spoken even this much detail about my situation to Kirill.
In fact, I had gone to great lengths to hide from him that Norman Erdonar had oppressed me. At the time, I thought I had to become thoroughly one of the Erdonars in order to be someone worthy of Kirill.
‘It was all pointless in the end.’
Shaking off the useless thought, I continued.
“And by the time I was finally in a position to look for it, the Dorlin Orphanage had already disappeared.”
“…I see.”
His face was unreadable, but he nodded slightly.
“Even if I have to explain, I’d rather do it in person. So please arrange a meeting quickly.”
“…I’ll pass that along.”
“Thank you.”
I took a sip of coffee, the rich aroma filling my mouth.
“Come to think of it, I don’t even know your name.”
“My name?”
“Yes.”
He froze, as if I had asked something forbidden. His bright smile from earlier was gone.
Well, I supposed it wasn’t wise for a guild master to reveal too much information about himself. I felt foolish for asking and opened my mouth again.
“Sorry. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to—”
“Chadwick.”
“…No last name?”
“Just call me Chadwick.”
His firm tone made me nod.
Chadwick. I felt like I’d heard that name somewhere before, but couldn’t quite place it.
‘Was it in the noble registry?’
One of the first things I had to memorize after coming to Erdonar was that damned noble directory—who belonged to which family, who was whose son or son-in-law, things like that.
‘So, is he a noble too?’
Just then, the coffee house door opened with a loud jingle. My gaze was fixed on it like someone caught in a trap.
“Someone you know?”
Of course. The ones who entered were Kirill and Giselle. They walked in naturally and were shown to a table.
They hadn’t noticed me yet. I pulled my hood further down.
“Yes. I know them. And it would be better not to get caught.”
“…Hmm.”
I didn’t know if Kirill had read the correction article or not, but the last thing I wanted was to be discovered by him. I still wasn’t ready to endure his contemptuous gaze.
“Let’s leave now.”
“All right.”
Thankfully, Chadwick didn’t press for details. I pulled the hood completely over my face and clung close to his side.
Kirill and Giselle were walking toward us. Please just pass by. Please, please…
“Wait—Saya?”
Giselle’s voice rang out, clear but quiet. The two of them stopped right in front of our table.
When I looked up, Giselle and Kirill were staring down at me.
“So it wasn’t a complete lie, huh? About having a lover.”
Giselle looked pale, as if in shock. Kirill, beside her, simply stared at me blankly.
His gaze suffocated me. There was contempt in Kirill’s eyes.
No—his eyes weren’t on me at all. They were on Chadwick. And the more that happened, the tighter Chadwick’s fingers intertwined with mine.
“Saya, do you know them?”
“No. Let’s go. Quickly.”
I wanted nothing more than to escape Kirill’s gaze. My heart pounded as if it would leap out of my chest.
I passed by Kirill with Chadwick at my side. Even then, he stood frozen in place.
“You’ve looked unwell since earlier.”
I lifted my head at Chadwick’s words.
The carriage was big enough to seat six comfortably. Once again, I almost clapped at the guild’s wealth.
I shook my head slowly.
“I’m just tired.”
“Who was that?”
“……”
He had so many questions. As if he were the client, not me. At first, I answered a few absentmindedly, but gradually I fell silent.
Why should I spill my private life to him? I had only asked him to take on this request. Nothing beyond that was his business.
“You don’t need to know that.”
My voice was colder than before, my bad mood seeping through. Yet he looked unbothered, his expression as relaxed as ever.
“There’s one thing I am curious about.”
“What is it?”
“If Chaedy doesn’t want to see you, what will you do?”
“……”
He knew that if he wanted me to speak, he had to ask about Chaedy.
I met his gaze helplessly. My heart, already heavy from Kirill’s earlier stare, sank even deeper.
‘If Chaedy doesn’t want to see me…’
No matter how much I thought about it, my answer didn’t change. Rejection was something I knew well.
I had never once felt like I truly belonged anywhere. The only future I had ever wished for was with Kirill—but he never wanted me. Rejected, and rejected again.
As if that wasn’t enough, they even tried to marry me off to someone I barely knew.
No one needed me. In this world, I was nothing but an impurity.
Maybe the real reason I wanted to find Chaedy was a selfish hope that perhaps he still needed me.
“I can understand.”
“…Understand what?”
“Understand if he doesn’t want to see me.”
“Yes. If it were me, I’d feel the same way.”
After all, I was the one who broke the promise and left him alone there.
“……”
Before I knew it, the carriage arrived at a spot not far from the Erdonar estate. I had no intention of riding all the way up to the mansion.
“Thank you for bringing me. I trust you’ll handle the rest properly.”
“…Don’t worry. I’ll give you a clear answer about Chaedy next time.”
“Good.”
As soon as I stepped out of the carriage, the cold night air wrapped around me. I let out a sigh, my breath turning white as it scattered in the air.
It seemed winter was nearly here. All I wanted was to leave for the warm southern countryside of Trillin before the season fully arrived.
