“No, I mean, I like you too. As a friend.”

“…”

“But for us to date… even you can see that’s a bit much, right?”

“Ah.”

Now that I hear it, I remember.

How could I have forgotten this?

And right after this…

“Haven’t you seen them? The girls I’ve dated. Didn’t you feel anything watching them? What were you thinking, confessing to me? You and them… No, I won’t go that far.”

Right. This is the line that’s supposed to come out.

The line that crushed my self-esteem and plunged me into a pit of depression.

I looked over the boy standing in front of me.

Tall, with soft hair, and smooth features that would probably earn him some ridiculous nickname like ‘The Holy Trinity of XX University.’ On top of that, an expression that screamed, ‘I’m pissed off but I’m holding it in.’

“…Seo Jae-gyeom.”

“Yeah.”

The boy nodded at my call.

Right, Seo Jae-gyeom.

The most popular guy in our school before the idol trainee, Jung Eun-seong, transferred.

Even after Eun-seong’s arrival, he hadn’t really been overshadowed, still commanding a share of the girls’ affections.

My first love.

‘My mom used to work as a housekeeper at Seo Jae-gyeom’s house.’

Whenever I went to his house to run an errand, the dazzling Seo Jae-gyeom was always there.

A handsome boy my age who lived in a clean, spacious house that couldn’t even be compared to mine.

Living with his mother in the best neighborhood, in the biggest house in this area.

Rumored to be the illegitimate son of some corporation.

And I am one of the few people who knows that rumor is true.

‘Oh, Kang Da-hye. Hi.’

‘Kang Da-hye. You’re here again.’

Even though he could have been uncomfortable with me knowing his secret, Seo Jae-gyeom never showed it.

He would give me a half-hearted greeting at school, and offer to walk me home if it was late. He never actually did, but it was the thought that counted.

‘Seo Jae-gyeom, are you dating Kang Da-hye?’

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’

It was the perfect environment for me to misunderstand.

But reality isn’t a drama, and I’m not the main character.

It was truly just a misunderstanding.

“It really is Seo Jae-gyeom…”

I looked at Seo Jae-gyeom’s face, which I hadn’t seen since my senior year of high school, with a sense of wonder.

Like many other friends, I lost contact with him as soon as we graduated.

The contact, which had always been one-sided on my part, was completely severed when I, ashamed of my poor exam results, went into hiding from my friends.

Seo Jae-gyeom never once looked for me.

“Seo Jae-gyeom. When did I confess to you?”

“I don’t know? I don’t really remember that part.”

Seo Jae-gyeom replied to my question nonchalantly.

Just from this, I can tell he has no feelings for me.

It’s March now.

Early March.

The semester has… no, school! School has been in session for less than a week.

Q. Don’t people usually confess on special days like Valentine’s Day, the end-of-year festival, or the graduation trip?

If you get rejected, how are you going to face the same guy at school after confessing to him at the very beginning of the semester? Especially since you’re in the same class as him at this point.

A. No.

I also confessed at the end of the year.

I confessed last December, and I’m only just getting his answer now.

‘Huh? You? Me?’

‘Jae-gyeom! Hurry up! We won’t get seats if we’re late!’

‘Ah. But I have to go now. I’ll contact you later?’

And then, he ghosted me for the entire winter break.

Seo Jae-gyeom didn’t even come to the closing ceremony, saying he was going on a trip abroad.

I was the only one agonizing over whether to contact him or not, clutching my phone and stewing until March. Checking Chasebook dozens of times a day, where pictures of Seo Jae-gyeom surfing at Manly Beach were being posted.

There’s that famous saying that no answer is also an answer.

But just in case. Holding onto a sliver of hope.

For the record, my birthday is in February, and Seo Jae-gyeom didn’t send a single message that day either.

And then, when we ended up in the same class after school started, he saw me and, as if he had just remembered, said, ‘Ah,’ and…

Only just gave me his answer today.

The me of before regression was hurt by this and cried her eyes out.

But the me of now?

“Dahye, you’re a smart girl. You get it without me having to say more, right? I’ll just pretend I didn’t hear what you said that day. You too…”

“Yeah, sure.”

I raised my hand to stop him.

“I understand what you mean. You want to pretend it never happened, right? That’s fine by me.”

It may have been a heartbreaking unrequited love that made me cry every night 11 years ago, but to the twenty-nine-year-old me now, it’s just laughable.

‘Honestly, Kang Da-hye, you have a sixth sense for handsome men.’

But still, how could you even think of confessing?

Was he the only handsome guy around? Then you should have just not liked anyone.

If you had just taken a step back, you would have seen it clearly.

Who was in Seo Jae-gyeom’s heart.

‘Whatever, we won’t see each other after graduation anyway.’

I have things that are far more important than Seo Jae-gyeom.

I dusted off my uniform, which had gotten a little dusty, and looked up at him.

Seo Jae-gyeom narrowed his eyes slightly at my direct gaze.

“Kang Da-hye?”

“Sorry for crossing the line. I won’t do it again.”

“Uh…”

“Well, I’m heading back first then.”

“O…kay.”

“Yeah.”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“Oh, but Seo Jae-gyeom.”

“Yeah?”

“If ‘how could you confess to me after seeing all the girls I’ve dated’ isn’t a harsh thing to say, then what exactly is your definition of harsh?”

I returned to the classroom alone without waiting for an answer.

I couldn’t remember which class was mine, so I wandered around for a bit before finally finding it by looking at my classmates’ faces.

“My locker is… ah, here it is.”

There’s a lock on it, but I don’t remember the combination.

Let’s just break it.

Thwack!

“Gasp.”

“Crazy.”

My classmates stared in horror as I smashed the lock off with a broom.

“Dahye, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I’m fine. I’m great right now.”

I took out all the textbooks from the locker. I hugged them in my arms and turned around.

I asked a girl whose eyes I happened to meet.

“Hey, friend.”

“Uh, yeah?”

“Can you tell me where my seat was?”

I didn’t sleep well yesterday, so I can’t remember. I added, and she pointed somewhere without any particular suspicion.

Second row, third seat.

“Thanks.”

I sat down and piled the textbooks I had brought onto my desk.

Taking a deep breath, I started flipping through them one by one.

-Korean.

Well, it’s Korean. I haven’t forgotten the language. I just need to practice solving problems again. Pass.

-English.

I have a perfect score on the TOEIC, so I should be fine. Pass.

-Korean History.

I know the general flow, but I don’t remember the details. Let’s put this on hold for now.

-Math.

Huh? What was this symbol again? How do you solve this?

-A second foreign language that other kids don’t have to take, but I, who is aiming for Hankuk University, must=French.

The only French I remember are Joan of Arc, Napoleon, and jambon-beurre??????

Wait a minute, but math… this subject, which at this time was more commonly called the ‘Mathematical Inquiry Area’… I don’t remember a single thing…?

“I’m screwed…”

I’m f*cked.

That is the conclusion I can reach without much deliberation.

I am f*cked.

“Wow, crazy. I don’t remember anything.”

I can’t even remember the quadratic formula.

How much time is left until the college entrance exam?

A year and seven months? Eight months?

But just doing well on the exam isn’t everything. My grades are important too.

So I have to study the stuff I’ve forgotten while also keeping up with new material…?

Drip, drip.

“Gasp, Dahye! Why are you crying!”

“Huh? Kang Da-hye is crying?”

“Kang Da-hye is crying.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“Dahye, are you okay?”

“…What’s going on?”

“Jae-gyeom, Dahye is crying!”

“…Crying?”

Just then, Seo Jae-gyeom, who was just entering the classroom, heard that I was crying and looked at me.

Seo Jae-gyeom, seeing the tears streaming down my face, frowned slightly… and sighed.

As if he had expected it.

He must be really tired of me.

I want to tell him, ‘I’m not crying because of you,’ but it would probably just sound like an excuse to him…

Ah, this is so embarrassing.

“I’m just going to go to the bathroom for a second.”

I grabbed the first thing I could, my phone, and left the classroom.

I leaned my back against the hallway wall and took a deep breath.

“It’s okay.”

There’s still a lot of time.

You’ve managed to travel back in time, you’ve been given a second chance that others can only dream of. Are you going to whine?

“No whining. These are tears of joy.”

I wiped away my tears with the back of my hand and fiddled with my smartphone with the other.

It’s a model from 11 years ago, so it’s definitely heavy, thick, and slow.

Let’s see.

What apps did the 11-years-ago me use?

“I used the same music app 11 years ago. …What’s this, a ‘Crush Playlist’?”

[Kang Da-hye’s Crush Playlist]

• Should’ve Just Been Friends

• If It Was Me… The one who loves you… If it was me…

• Always… a step behind… I was there…☆

• I want to tell you… that I love you… I hate myself… for not being able to say anything…

• Even by chance… I would be happy… if I could just run into you… if I could just look at you one more time…

• A Friend’s Confession…☆★☆

• You must really… be comfortable around me…

• One-Sided Love ㅠ

• What do I do~~~ I’m still so clumsy~~~

Note: Is it that hard for you to have one meal with me… I’m going crazy, you stars… I want you. Jae.

“Argh!”

What is this!

I threw the phone I was holding.

The smartphone tumbled, its screen still on, and stopped at someone’s feet.

“Uh…”

Someone slowly bent down and picked up my brightly lit dark history.